The Latest Breaking News from Gwynnie

Folks, we finally know what Gwyneth Paltrow thinks about the mysterious bed shitter who fled the scene of the crime (AKA her house in Montecito).  Apparently, some insiders close to the stinky incident have claimed she was “horrified” by the whole shebang. As she should be! ICYMI, there was a…

"The story goes that a recent houseguest of Gwynnie's catastrophically shat themselves in bed while staying there, then fled back to the city so they didn't have to face the music."

Poor Gwynnie. She’s in the dock in Utah at the moment channelling serious ‘I only eat bone broth’ energy where she is being sued by a retired optometrist who says she skiied into him. He says the opposite.

That was... weird.

There was only one way to find out the benefits of a milk bath that Gwyneth Paltrow enthused about and that was to plunge into a bath of milk myself