Can you consider yourself a busy, city-dwelling professional in a committed relationship (with another person as well as a smartphone) if you’ve never fantasised about running for the actual hills?
In today’s digitally reliant culture, we’re always on. We rise and we grind, our lives geared towards productivity and networking. Society tells us to connect – which usually means to see and be seen – leaving us at the mercy of apps, meetings, ringtones, deadlines and plans. But being busy comes at a cost, and often it’s our most meaningful relationships that pay.
For many couples going at full pelt on life’s treadmill, it’s hard to carve out space for each other and easy to forget that connection is a matter of quality, peace and privacy.
This is why the idea of escaping to remote log cabins with no internet to wear Fair Isle knits and live off the land indefinitely sounds like nirvana. However, it is also not a long-term solution for most of us. But the daycation is.
A daycation, as the name suggests, is simply a day away from real life. You press pause on pavement-pounding to hike through landscapes patchworked by field and forest – a salve for any couple with punishing timetables. And happily, here in the UK, it’s not difficult to find yourself in what feels like a wilderness just an hour out of the city. From a hike through the Surrey Hills, from London, to a day exploring the West Pennine Way, from Manchester, there’s always somewhere a train ride away that offers a complete contrast to metropolitan life.
“The change in scenery, with its fresh air and open spaces, allows couples to step away from the pressures of work, noise and screens, reconnecting with each other in a tranquil environment,” says Dr Elena Touroni, a consultant psychologist and co-founder of the Chelsea Psychology Clinic. “Research has shown that time in nature lowers stress levels, boosts mental clarity, and enhances emotional wellbeing – all of which can positively impact your relationship.”
This is certainly the case for Reza Moaiandin, 35, and Nichola Morgan, 36, who live in the suburbs of Leeds, a city shrouded by moorland and just a couple of hours away from the Lake District. They’ve been married for a year and a half, having met on a dating website in 2016.
They are both professionals: Moaiandin runs his own marketing company, Salt agency, and has also launched a supplement brand, while HR consultant Morgan works part-time for Moaiandin’s agency and teaches leadership and management at Leeds Beckett University.
Safe to say, they’re a busy couple. But hiking has always been an integral part of their relationship.
“As life has got busier, walking has become more of a staple part of it for us,” says Moaiandin. “We find a mountain in the middle of nowhere and go off walking for the day,” he says, adding that he only uses the phone to check the route. “Walking lets us escape from work: it’s like therapy.”
Morgan agrees, citing turning off devices as a key part of why their daycations work.
“We met on the internet, we’re in techy worlds, we’re always on chats and WhatsApps,” she says of their marriage. “So when you walk together you actually talk: there’s a proper back and forth where you’re both being heard. When you’ve had a frustrating week, you get time to debrief and open up.”
The couple has found that the most important and pivotal conversations of their entire relationship have taken place while out walking in England’s green and pleasant land.
“Over the years, walking has been when we’ve asked, ‘Do we want children?’, ‘Where do we want to live?’, ‘What’s your ideal job?’,” says Morgan. “We unpack deeper conversations because we’re more connected. Even if we start quietly, at some point we’ll start to talk about what’s really going on: you peel it out of each other.”
Hiking means that, unless you’re both particularly dexterous, you can’t have eye contact. This might seem avoidant or anti-intimacy – especially given how eye contact is lauded as the magic bullet of communications – but actually not looking at each other can make conversation less intense. Tricky topics can be unpacked and unpicked without the pressure of one another’s gaze.
“Walking side-by-side rather than face-to-face creates a unique dynamic where couples can communicate more freely without the intensity of direct eye contact,” says Touroni. “This relaxed posture often encourages open and honest conversations, allowing thoughts to flow naturally.”
Her thoughts are echoed by Barbara Santini, a psychologist specialising in relationships: “Walking together creates a rhythm that fosters synchrony (where you’re both in step), both physical and emotional. This shared pace naturally promotes non-verbal bonding, which is vital for emotional attunement. Additionally, the simplicity of walking allows couples to engage in unpressured dialogue, making it easier to address feelings, or simply enjoy each other’s company.”
Then there’s the sense of communion that comes from being together as you scale inclines, read maps and share sandwiches on windy summits.
Santini believes this is endlessly important for any relationship: “These shared achievements create lasting memories tied to positive emotions, cementing the relationship through mutual trust and accomplishment,” she says.
It’s a scenario Moaiandin and Morgan both recognise. “If it’s a more challenging walk, it feels like we’re winning something,” says Moaiandin. “Reaching a destination together makes us come back happier. We’ve achieved something together.”
Morgan agrees, especially when it comes to walking down mountains, something she finds more difficult. “I have to go really slowly, so it tends to be that I drag [Reza] up and he helps me back down, so it’s quite good teamwork really.”
The beauty of a hiking daycation is that, even as you descend back to real life, you aren’t disappointed. Instead, you return renewed, with lungs full of fresh air, memories made, energy topped up – and the promise of getting that celebratory dinner you’ve truly earned.
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