Something has got Tory MSP Graham Simpson a "little sad".
Fair enough, there is plenty to be sad about at the moment. Perhaps it’s his law-breaking boss, who jaunted from party to party as thousands of people died under his watch? No, he's kept tight-lipped on that. Is it the UK Government sending innocent and vulnerable people to Rwanda? Wrong again.
So, just what could it be?
Violins at the ready, Graham Simpson is mourning the lack of Union flags in Edinburgh.
Yes, you read that right. While his party continues to make morally questionable decisions, what's got the Central Scotland MSP down in the dumps is Scotland's limited Jubilee propaganda.
Aw Tory Graham Simpson is sad Scotland isn’t smothered in Union Jacks. #bbcdn pic.twitter.com/oRshNqGBfJ
— Phantom Power (@PhantomPower14) June 2, 2022
Speaking on BBC Debate Night on Wednesday, Simpson revealed he wished Scotland's capital was just a bit more like London.
"I was walking out of the Parliament, just the other day, and a couple of American tourists approached me and said, 'what are you doing for the Jubilee?'
"They'd be down in London and it was all flags and bunting, but nothing here. It's a little sad."
Well, Graham, the Jouker would wager that maybe Scotland has enough Tory-induced disasters to deal with instead of festooning the streets in red, white and blue - the cost of living crisis, Brexit - take your pick, the list goes on.
Of course, if there were more flags the Tories could use them to balance out the skyrocketing energy prices. Can’t afford to pay your heating bill? Wrap yourself in a Union Jack, keep calm and carry on! Doesn’t quite have the same ring to it …
But it’s not all doom and gloom for Graham! Some Scottish Tories have taken decoration upon themselves. Why bother with morality when you could simply cover your office in Jubilee-themed balloons? This is certainly the tact of Andrew Bowie, who seems keen to keep his Twitter followers up to date with every Union flag raised in his constituency.
Maybe Graham should keep a closer eye on his mate’s social media to buoy his spirits through this tough time.
