An Irish League footballer has opened up on the mental health battle that has helped shape his life and career - and he hopes his experiences can help others in need.
Stewart Nixon hit rock bottom following the sudden death of good pal and former Carrick Rangers teammate Jerry Thompson in December 2019.
The 25-year-old also went through the trauma of watching his father Andrew's health deteriorate during lockdown.
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Over two years on and Stewart admits he is in "a good place" with his own mental health, and believes those past experiences have made him a stronger person today.
But he also accepts he wouldn't have got through those dark days if he hadn't opened up on his troubles and spoke to someone.
"I started struggling with my mental health around the time my dad wasn't well. And also Jerry's death," the Carrick Rangers forward said.
"Jerry died at the start of December and that was a really tough stage for me. Then my dad wasn't well around March/April time, when Covid hit.
"He had Covid and also struggled with lockdown and isolation. He really wasn't well and there was a lot of uncertainty, and it was a really tough period. And it all came at once and I didn't know how to deal with it or fix it.
"It was difficult trying to speak to someone, and it was around the time of the lockdown so I was in the house most of the time. You couldn't meet someone for a chat.
"I didn't want to pass on my own problems to other people. I didn't want to burden them.
"And I still feel like that now, but it is definitely easier to talk to people now than it was back then."
Stewart added: "I felt responsible for looking after my dad during that time, and it did become a bit overwhelming at times.
"I had a fiancee and then my young daughter arrived. And also football was halted due to Covid.
"The positive I take is that I came through it, and I managed to get through it by talking to people. I just had to admit that I was struggling.
"I didn't know what to do, but friends and family were able to help me. They were a massive support."
Stewart says he often thinks about former Carrick teammate and close pal Jerry Thompson, who died suddenly just before Christmas in 2019.
But he believes the struggles he came through helps him cope with life, and his football career.
He he believes it has given him strength as he continues his recovery from a serious ACL injury which is set to rule him out of playing for several months.
"Dealing with grief after losing Jerry was tough, and I still haven't got over that," he added.
"It does get easier as time goes on, but it never leaves you. That was very overwhelming.
"But I feel like I have got the tools to deal with things a lot better now. I think you have to go through those tough situations to get to where you are now. And they make you stronger.
"If I didn't go through those things with Jerry and my dad, I don't think I would have got through the injury ordeal.
"But the process now is easier to control and easier to manage. "
Stewart believes attitudes around mental health have changed for the better in recent years, admitting the "message is starting to get through".
He added: "I think there is less stigma attached to mental health, and I have only noticed it myself in recent times.
"There are a lot more people, and more groups, who are coming out and saying 'speak to someone'. And it isn't just about men's mental health, it is everyone.
"We all need to chat to someone and share our problems and concerns. Gradually the message is starting to get through and more people are opening up."
Stewart's club Carrick Rangers recently marked World Mental Health Day by dedicating a new 'Wellbeing' section on the club's official website.
It features a range of useful resources and tools to help anyone struggling.
"It is brilliant seeing Carrick Rangers having this wellbeing platform on their website, and it is the way forward," he added.
"And we need more clubs doing likewise to share that message.
"We need Linfield, Glentoran and the other bigger clubs promoting it even more. They have massive fan bases and it would be great to get that message out there.
"People suffer in different ways. It is not just one thing, it can be multiple things. Alcohol, drugs, gambling, cost of living - there are so many things that can impact on your mental health.
"And it doesn't have to be a footballer or sportsperson who can go and read this info, anyone can.
"And if it helps one person out there, then Carrick have done a brilliant job."
He added: "My message to anyone struggling is to speak up and share your concerns with someone. Speak to someone.
"Whether that's a close family member or friend, or a complete stranger. Speak to somebody.
"Whether you're under pressure at work or within your family, or you're struggling with money. Just speak up.
"Don't think twice about it.
"Bad times don't last forever, just like my injury. I know there are brighter days ahead."
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