A black labrador sizes up a leafy lookalike at a festival celebrating all things canine.
Elsewhere a poodle with bright pink ears prances around in the sun, while in the agility area labradors are clattering into the jumps, rather than clearing them.
We’re at unique Goodwoof, at the Goodwood estate near Chichester, in West Sussex.
Billed as the ultimate dogs’ day out and now in its second year, around 5,000 people enjoyed the weekend event, most bringing their four-legged best friend.
All entrants are invited to try a host of activities: dog yoga, sound baths (that’s meditation with dogs), sledwork lessons and Canicross (running attached to your dog by a harness).
My dog Muffin and his brother Otto, two-year-old flat-coated retrievers, are on their best behaviour. Mostly...
Muffin recently had his “gentleman’s procedure” and is not meant to leap around.
But there are hundreds of doggy rear ends to sniff and a woodland walk that holds the promise of un-chased squirrels.
His tail is flying back and forth so fast that I worry he might take off.
By the time we reach the have-a-go hurdles he slips out of my grasp and runs around like a demented greased piglet, woofing with joy.
Next it’s off to watch the professionals. Collies drive sheep and cocker spaniels collect goodies and leap over fences.
I tell Muffin to watch and learn. He gives me an ear wash instead. Otto, drooling, gazes at a dad devouring a burger.
Other pooches are better behaved. The pink-eared poodle is called Darla and she is loving the attention from passers-by.
Owner Debbie Simms-Walker says it is the first time Darla has had a pro dye-job.
“It took five hours for her to be groomed,” she admits.
“She gets washed, combed and blowdried every couple of weeks, so there is a lot of maintenance.”
Over in the wacky Barkitecture corner, Grand Designs host Kevin McCloud is chatting to comedian Bill Bailey about the best kennel designs for offices.
Ex-footballer Peter Crouch is also around with his dog.
Miniature poodles Coco and Nina sashay past in pink tutus.
Groomer Bev Jordan, 57, from Fetcham, Surrey, says: “The girls just love getting dressed up.”
Last up is a dip at Fido’s Lido. Muffin locks eyes with a yellow lab and the pair splash around.
The trip home is a soggy one. But tired Muffin nods off, no doubt dreaming of those squirrels.
