ANY relief that clerical abuse survivor Scott Hallett felt after hearing of paedophile priest Vincent Ryan's death made way within minutes for frustration.
"I was happy at first, ding dong the witch is dead type thing, but the biggest thing is more that there's still unfinished business," Mr Hallett told the Newcastle Herald.
"While it's good he's gone, I was initially 'Yeah great', but then thought 'Oh no, hang on a minute, I personally know of people who still haven't come forward in regards to him' and sometimes I think those people are not going to have the chance - they've missed the boat a little bit.
"That's the saddest thing, because it felt so good actually looking him in the eye and saying 'Remember my name'... I think a lot of people have been robbed of that. So many people have missed out."
Mr Hallett and Gerard McDonald went to police in 1995 about their abuse at the hands of Ryan, who preyed on them while they were altar boys at St Joseph's Merewether.
Ryan went to jail for 14 years for abusing 34 boys between 1973 and 1991.
Mr Hallett and Mr McDonald were at court when Ryan was sentenced in 2019 to a second jail term of three years and three months after a further two survivors came forward. Ryan was released on parole in April 2021.
"I bailed up Ryan in the corridor and said 'Mate do you remember me?' and he said 'No'. I said 'My name is Scott Hallett - make sure you don't forget it again'.
"The look on his face... it was very therapeutic."
Mr Hallett said if Ryan had lived longer, there's a chance further survivors who came forward may have lead to him being jailed for a third time, possibly until his death.
Instead Ryan died a free man and still a priest, because he wasn't defrocked.
"If there is a God I wonder how he handles that one," Mr Hallett said.
The Herald reported on Monday that advocates for survivors were concerned why the Diocese of Maitland-Newcastle hadn't notified the community of Ryan's death - or contacted his victims.
Clergy Abused Network chairperson Robert O'Toole said Diocesan Administrator Father Greg Barker told him last Wednesday Ryan had died several weeks before.
"It's very secretive," Mr Hallett said.
"[Because] they had not defrocked him are they worried about backlash? I don't know.
"That's the thing with the church, there's no rhyme or reason, it's just about covering their backsides.
"If it was me and it was someone on my team who had been really bad, you'd be going 'He's dead, let's let everybody know he's dead and maybe everyone will leave us alone'. But nothing? [He died] weeks ago.
"A lot of people know of him, but nobody's found that out until Bob was told?"
Mr McDonald said he was "utterly disgusted" at how the diocese had responded to Ryan's death.
"I was happy, but angry - very angry that they could not even have the balls, they just don't want to remember him and yet they covered up for him for years... they wiped their hands of him, but they buried him a priest," he said.
"[They've said] 'We don't want anyone to know, so forget about it, forget about the victims, he's dead now'.
"They're the ones who let him rape all these children and they need to be accountable."
A diocesan spokeswoman told the Herald Ryan died on April 13 and "his remains were dealt with respectfully but privately and without ceremony".
"The diocese has no further comment regarding his death," she said.
The spokeswoman said the diocese "had an arrangement" with Ryan "which was intended to minimise any potential risk of his release in the community".
She said the Pope has authority to remove a priest from the clerical state on advice from the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith (CDF).
She said the late Bishop Bill Wright petitioned the CDF twice.
She said support was available to survivors and families through the Zimmerman Service.
"The diocese recognises the past is with us today," she said.
"The diocese has, is and will continue to acknowledge the shameful aspects of its history where children suffered abuse and some of its leaders failed to protect them from harm.
"The pain and damage caused is current each day for some survivors and their families."
Mr Hallett said the legacy of his abuse was extreme and ongoing.
"I've always relied on myself, I don't trust anybody, apart from my wife and kids and very close friends," he said.
"Authority, I'm not real good on... I can't handle people telling me what to do."
He said while some survivors felt it helpful to talk about their experience, he preferred to leave it in the past.
"I've tried to do stuff to myself but I've learned to get over that and I can't go and see a psychiatrist because that actually makes it worse if I go and talk to anybody," he said.
"I'd rather put it in the back of my mind and forget about it, like half of us do.
"I've got all the books and stuff like that and I don't even read them because even reading other people's stories gets me thinking about mine and it ends up bad.
"I don't talk to anybody about it, I don't read anything about it, I don't spend my life dwelling on it because I know where I've been and I've worked hard not to be there anymore."
Mr McDonald said his abuse had been a "life sentence".
"I'm still dealing with it to this day," he said.
"When you sleep you dream, I have nightmares... and the older you get the more you remember and I've been remembering so much more it's not funny.
"The impact on my life is full on.
"It affects generations, my son is affected by what happened to me.
"Where are the payments for the suffering of the spouses?
"People have suicided and left children behind."
Fellow survivor Stephen Murray said he believed the diocese had "covered up" Ryan's death, because it was "customary when a priest dies that it's published".
He was abused by three brothers and knows several of Ryan's victims.
"This is a man who has been maintained as a priest to buy his silence," he said.
"Attempting to cover [his death] up and keep it a secret from everybody only adds to the pain of people like Gerard and Scott and their families."
Greens Senator Elect David Shoebridge said the church's silence following Ryan's death "matches the church's inaction during his abusive career".
"Ryan's death will be a tough time for his victims, especially those who have not had justice and they should all be in our thoughts right now.
"It's hard to comprehend why the church can't recognise this and at the very least make a public statement of regret, apology and compassion."
