A Falkirk in-person event for people interested in becoming foster carers is to be held later this month, in a bid to help keep local children as close to home as possible.
It is the first in-person event for two years – and it will be invaluable for anyone who is thinking about opening their home and heart to a child.
Falkirk Council’s Sharon Laing hopes that the event will give people an insight into the challenges – and rewards – of fostering.
Current foster carers will be there to share the day to day reality of the role while social workers will explain the assessment process and the kind of support you can expect.
Youngsters who have been in foster care will also be there to talk about what it meant to them.
Sharon said: “It’s fantastic that they are involved. It’s an opportunity to find out what it meant to them to have someone who is on their side and caring for them at a really difficult time in their life.”
Sharon said that what children coming into foster care are looking for is someone who can provide safety and stability when the rest of their world is upside-down.
And that’s also why it is so important to have local people who are willing to share their homes.
“We want carers to be local so the children have less disruption in their lives,” said Sharon. “They can still go to their local school, they still go to their football club or go to see Granny for their tea if that’s okay.
“It’s important that we keep all the other connections and get as much stability as we can for them.”
To become a foster carer, all you need is to be over 21 and have a spare room the child can call their own. The main quality they’re looking for is what they call “stickability.”
“We’re looking for people who are prepared to be there during the difficult times and really celebrate the good times,” explained Sharon. “We need someone who will champion the young person.
“They may be struggling a bit at school or need a health appointment – and we need someone who will put them at the centre of what’s happening.”
They have had successes with people taking on more a ‘big sister’ or grandparent role with children – what matters is that the child is treated as part of the family, not just someone who happens to stay with them.
Sharon added: “We want someone who will take them into their heart and their home – and also someone who is up for a bit of fun and who’ll do the daft stuff that kids love.”
The placement might be for a weekend or a week in the holidays. Or it might be for the rest of their childhood and beyond – and foster carers often stay in touch with children, even if its only a text now and then.
The attention and love that foster carers give to a child makes a world of difference – and the benefits are not all one-sided. Many foster carers have spoken of the huge pride they feel the first time they watch as a wee one rides off without stabilisers.
And sometimes the smallest moments matter most.
Sharon recalls a carer telling her about a child who could’t tolerate touch, until one day when they were sitting together on a sofa, watching a film, their head just tipped over onto the carer’s shoulder.
“That’s where there’s a real spark of joy for carers – they’ve made that difference, they’ve made that child feel so safe and secure that now they can seek a bit of warmth and affection from the carer, whereas adults before had maybe been really scary,” said Sharon.
Taking children into care is very much a last resort and will only happen when children cannot stay with their birth families. Unfortunately, it can mean siblings being separated.
Sharon said: “It’s with great sadness we have to have siblings separated because we don’t have the carers with space in their home to care for them.”
“It’s our moral aim to keep them together but it’s not always possible because we don’t always have enough carers with the space and the skills to support them.”
But the skills that are needed can be learned.
“Values, ethics and passion – that’s the stuff we can’t help to develop, that’s on them,” said Sharon. “But all the structure around caring for children, we can absolutely help to develop those skills.”
She promises that carers will never feel alone or unsupported – and that starts even before an application is submitted.
The process can take up to six months to make sure that the carer is going into the process with open eyes – and that they know what the challenges and the joys will be.
Those who do become foster carers will find themselves a vital part of a team that includes social workers, psychologists and speech and language therapists.
She said: “You’re very much part of the child’s team – and a vital one because often the foster carer knows the child best and really gets to understand the child.”
Crucially, they will also work alongside the birth parents to help prepare for the child returning, keeping routines in place so that everything is as smooth as possible.
The Fostering Open Evening is on Wednesday, March 30 – drop in anytime between 5 and 8 pm at Camelon Social Work Services, 108b Glasgow Road. Camelon, FK1 4HS.
For more information visit : https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/fostering-open-evening-tickets-294453667847
