There is, for the most part, a very good reason why we mostly pay more to consume lager out of a pump.
Beer in cans has a tendency to go flat, warms up quickly when left in the sun and just generally feels a bit less fancy.
However, it's summer and with summer comes barbecues and with barbecues comes canned beer. And despite it being a second-class citizen to beer on tap, there's a clear difference between elite canned beer and tastes-like-feet canned beer.
To save you from the latter, Lancashire Live have ranked the best and the worst of the lagers you might typically find in supermarkets and on the shelves. Yes, you might find a brand missing and yes you might cite unfairness in the difference between stubby cans and big ones. But we make the rules here and that's how we have done it. Tell me in the comments what a heathen I am.
Carling
Goes flat very quick, is quite bitter and really rather metallic. Doesn't save itself from any of those traits in any redeemable way. 'Not quite Carling' adverts are charming but entirely wide of reality.
Carlsberg
Not quite the pure can of water that it might have been a few years ago, it's actually not a terrible thing to drink.
Fosters
Or Tuborg. Some of these are quite difficult to write about in any tangibly different way to be honest, a bit like when I ranked Zizzi, Ask Italian and Prezzo. It's bottom of the barrel stuff, you can drink it, you don't feel good about it.
Grolsch
The can someone always passes me at Kendal Calling when I've run out. A bit beige and doesn't really excel at anything in particular.
Kronenbourg
A strange one in that it thinks it is a beer for the connoisseurs among us. A beer for people who think drinking is a serious business, whether down the pub or at a garden buffet with the kids and little sausage rolls. Better on draught, being in a tin spoils it somewhat.
Staropramen
Lots of fans of Staropramen out there so I'll be switching my emails off for the day that this goes live, much as I do whenever we reference where the Lancashire border is in any way. My problem is this: it is far too thick. Wouldn't be surprised if I heard someone had taken two slices of bread and butter, a bowl and some salt and pepper to get a can down.
Bud Light
For people who need a can in their hand at a social event but don't actually want to drink on that day. For example, an increasingly exhausted me during the World Cup last year. Just don't drink, you'll feel better for it. Completely inoffensive, otherwise.
Stella Artois
Unfortunately Stella Artois might still have something of a branding problem, in that I associate it with people who look like they're going to cause me harm in some way. That association is actually unfair, as of all the long-standing, been-around-the-block tinnies on this list, it actually does very well. Not bad at all.
San Miguel
Like Staropramen but tastier, less soupy, has less of an air of snobbery about it and is ubiquitous enough that nobody pretends it is a treat. It's better on draught than in a can by some distance.
Lost Lager
Lost Lager is surprisingly okay even if it feels its not quite happening for them. It's usually one of the more expensive options on the shelf and never quite justifies that. Doesn't help that they've had something of a controversial time over the last few years and the brand consequently feels about as punk as my big toe.
Never, ever as good a lager as it thinks it is.
Amstel
Like Fosters, but good. Very basic, very safe.
Birra Moretti
One of the better "premiums" by quite a distance is Moretti and sees off Kronenbourg, San Mig and Staro with minimal fuss. Reminds me a bit of James Milner in that I never really get excited about it despite the fact that it always delivers a solid 7/10 in any form.
Budweiser
Probably the most safe and dull option on the list, but it scores points for its staying power when left out on a sunny day. Being a bit warm doesn't temper the enthusiasm for Budweiser quite like it does with the others.
Red Stripe
The beer of choice for people who have been to gigs for years. Never seen it on draught and frankly I never want to. As normal drinking it from a can as drinking Guinness from a glass is. Drinkable, light, carries an unmistakeable air of mystique to it and your local off licence sells out of it when the sun comes out for very good reason.
Corona
A newcomer to the canned world. Took a battering for about a year we all displayed our intellect/ability to hive mind a joke by leaving it on the shelf throughout the pandemic. You can't put a slice of lime in a can (or you shouldn't) and it is always better without lime.
As a sidenote, it's also made an appearance in many pubs on draught of late which has really done a lot for my general perception of Corona. Once my go-to if we went into a pub that typically served sewage in the taps, it has now gone far beyond that.
Heineken
Was top of my favourites until Estrella swanned into my life to steal the crown. Has been around forever - but it has not been elite forever. I would never, ever order it in a pub, no matter how tempting the frozen pump looks. But in its little can, it has a lot of flavour and reliability to offer.
Estrella
You have probably detected a theme over the last few entries: stubbies win. Far less time is spent at the foot of the tinnie where the flat bits merge with your saliva to yield something that no longer resembles the original product. Nearly lost the top spot on account of Boris Johnson raising one that time. Always a treat when you spot one though, and though this is an article about cans, it would also nab the absolute top spot if we were ranking draught lagers too.
