Michelle Law attributes much of her success as a playwright, screenwriter and author to her understanding of — and guilt over— the difficulties her parents faced coming to Australia.
"There's less of an expectation from them, and maybe a pressure we put on ourselves to make that sacrifice worthwhile," she told the ABC.
"My siblings and I were very aware that my parents put aside their own interests and their own passions for us to have a bright future and for us to do what we want to do in our lives."
The 32-year-old, a rising star of Australia's cultural scene, is a finalist in the 2022 40 Under 40 Most Influential Asian-Australians Awards.
The awards, now in their fourth year, seek to confront Australia’s "bamboo ceiling" – the under-representation of Asian Australians in leadership positions.
The ABC spoke to Law and fellow 40 Under 40 finalists Angelina Inthavong and Charis Teh about the role their families have played in their success.
Guilt and gratitude
In 1975, Michelle Law's parents, Jenny and Danny, moved from Hong Kong to Queensland's Sunshine Coast.
Law admitted she occasionally felt ashamed of her parents when she was younger, wishing they were more "assimilated".
"There are a lot of cultural differences, from the lunches that you're getting packed for school to just cultural practices," she said.
"Like if we go out to a restaurant, I was kind embarrassed that my mum would be asking for some hot water with a meal, instead of just drinking something that I thought was normal."
But when she started university and met a wider cross-section of the community, she began to feel "extremely lucky" to have grown up with access to two different cultures.
"I felt like I was more like a citizen of the world than a lot of people that I knew," she said.
"I was connected to something bigger than Australia.
"[My parents] migrated to this country for a reason, that was for us to have a better quality of life and to pursue things that were fulfilling for us.
"I feel very grateful for that."
Law is best known for her smash-hit play Single Asian Female and the web series Homecoming Queens for SBS.
She's also a cultural commentator, prolific writer for magazines, newspapers and online and has screenwriting credits on a range of popular TV shows.
Her latest play, Top Coat, was staged by the Sydney Theatre Company and ran from June to August this year.
Her brother Benjamin Law (a past 40 Under 40 award winner) has also made an impact in Australia’s arts scene, most famously using their family's experience as inspiration for his book and a co-authored television series The Family Law.
Michelle Law said her parents had "always been very supportive from the get-go" in anything she decided to do.
"Whatever happens, whether it's personal or professional difficulties, I can always rely on them," she said.
"My parents, as they've gotten older as well, they only just keep getting more proud."
'My parents really forced me to apply for scholarships'
Angelina Inthavong told the ABC she would always be grateful for the sacrifices her parents made after coming to Australia from Cambodia in the 1980s to escape the Khmer Rouge and the Vietnam-backed People's Republic of Kampuchea.
Ms Inthavong said her parents prioritised her education and did their best to guide her despite the family's financial difficulties.
"Since my parents came from very under-funded state schools, my parents really forced me to apply for scholarships for private high schools, and to apply for scholarships for university," the 18-year-old said.
Ms Inthavong now works at the US Embassy in Canberra and with child sexual abuse prevention NGO Bravehearts, while finishing her undergraduate degree in public health at the Australia National University.
Her parents are quite proud, she said.
"If you come from a migrant or immigrant household, there is the importance placed on education," she said.
"Because a lot of the time, [education] is seen as the way to getting out and having social mobility or opportunity to pursue whatever you want in the future."
'Leave the world a better place'
Ms Inthavong said she was still guided by her father's values.
"He always says, 'no matter what I do in life, I should aim to leave the world a better place'," she said.
"I really apply that in all aspects of my life, whether it's just me being a genuinely good person and down to earth, or if it's through my advocacy."
However, she was still determined to choose her own path.
The two advocacy areas Ms Inthavong is passionate about are young people's sexual and mental health — two "taboos" in her family and for much of the wider Asian-Australian community.
"Though they [my parents] don't completely understand what I do, I think they understand that I love what I do and I'm passionate about it," she said.
"They see that I'm happy. I think that's all that matters to them."
Educating the next generation
Charis Teh, who came to Australia in 2003 from Borneo, Malaysia, now researches cancer therapy strategies at the Walter and Eliza Hall Institute of Medical Research and is an Asian migrant parent herself.
Dr Teh was the first in her family to attend university, and she told the ABC that her parents' influence was crucial to her success.
"What [my mother] did for me is really instil that spirit of hard work and discipline in me," she said.
Her oldest daughter, who is five, attends weekly piano and Chinese lessons based on the same educational concept in an effort to "cultivate a good discipline with them".
But she has found that getting kids to learn is "so hard".
"I do have a certain expectation that if I set her an activity or lesson, that she would try her best," Dr Teh said.
"I don't know whether I am a 'tiger mum'. But I hope that if I am, I'll be able to do that in a very loving and nurturing manner.
"I hope that they [my daughters] will be able to hold on to their cultural heritage and be the best that they can be so that they can contribute to the world as well."
The ABC is a media partner of the Asian-Australian Leadership Summit's 2022 40 Under 40 Most Influential Asian-Australians Awards. The winners of the awards will be announced at a ceremony on Tuesday, October 4.
