Andrea Price-Morgan said she knew from the age of six, but it was 26 years before she decided to live as her true self. Now aged 32, she came out as trans for her family and friends six months ago
Despite feeling more confident than ever before, she admitted it was hard to explain why she chose to come out later in life to her loved ones. "It's not part of the education of children growing up. But I've known since I was 6. When I came out, I knew I needed to be who I am and now me and my wife are living our best life." You can get more Swansea news and other story updates straight to your inbox by subscribing to our newsletters here.
Andrea, from Pontardawe, and her wife Mary Price-Morgan, 32, are regulars at regular LGBTQ+ "cuppa and chat" sessions in Swansea. Through them they have met new people of all ages and backgrounds.
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As someone who was often the youngest person at the sessions, Andrea said: "It's great seeing the older generation coming out and spending time with us. My dad is a similar age and I know how hard it was when they were my age. I respect them, because it's not easy."
In many ways attitudes towards LGBTQ+ people have changed over time, but living more rurally can bring its challenges for couples like Andrea and Mary. "We live in Pontardawe and it's not very open to change there. We don't drink in the area, we feel so much more comfortable coming to Swansea. It's been great, having people accept me for who I am. They respect us for who we are here, that's what we want - for everyone to be educated."
"Some people aren't even happy to recognise the community," she continued. "I suffer with mental health myself and that was on my mind before I came out. It's so much harder when you've got people close to you who don't accept you. It's not a choice though, it's who we are. I'm comfortable as a woman and I'm the happiest I've been in a long time," she said
'We're just normal people trying to live our lives'
Rachel, 63, who did not wish to share her surname, comes down from Cardigan just to meet with the group each week. "It's a safe and non-judgemental place for people to share with each other and make friends. You know you're accepted for who you are and you find that within the group we all have certain issues, whether that is mental or physical health or disabilities. It's all about talking to someone and it's a good way of preventing your mental health from developing."
"There's a lot of misconceptions because of the way the media portrays certain groups," explained Rachel. "We're just normal people trying to live our lives. The council are very supportive, bringing multi-faceted parts of the community together. We get a lot of allies coming to this who are straight too."
Steven Lewis-Jones said Swansea had almost taken a step back when it came to its gay scene
This week was Steven Lewis-Jones' first time at the coffee session. He moved to Swansea from London with his partner just over a year ago, having grown up in the Valleys and later spending his time in Swansea as a student during the late 70s and early 80s.
He was shocked when he returned to see the gay pubs and bars he used to frequent were long gone and there was nothing to replace them. "We were looking around and thinking, 'Is there not a bar or a cafe?' It's surprising that they've almost taken a step back.'" You can read about the fate of the much-loved Champers bar here to find out more about Swansea's dwindling LGBTQ+ nightlife.
The pair found out about the coffee sessions from a friend and were excited to go along this week. "It took us a long time to meet new people. It's great that there's this group, it's absolutely fantastic." On why it's important to have groups like this for the LGBTQ+ community to meet up, Steven said: "You can just talk and not be ridiculed. That's what I'm looking for."
Taryn said she sometimes felt like the only gay in the village when she was younger
Taryn Kristel, 64, has lived in Neath her whole life and has been going along to the sessions since October last year after reading about them in a leaflet. A lot of LGBTQ+ groups tended to be catered towards under 25s nowadays, explained Taryn, and when she was younger many of the groups were male-dominated. "I'd be the only gay in the village," she joked.
"I've not heard of anything else like this in the area," she said. "I don't ask what people's preferences are, we can just be ourselves and things are much easier." Taryn said she was once in a nearby pub in Swansea Marina with a female friend who she was talking about gay issues with and a man who was eavesdropping on their conversation asked them to "tone it down".
'You're not the problem'
Such a hostile environment could not be more opposite to the warm and welcoming feeling upstairs in Coast Cafe, a small business which group organiser Donna Markie said had been extremely supportive. "I always tell people, you're not the problem, it's their issue," she said and described the sessions as being all about relaxing and socialising in a safe space.
Running groups for the LGBTQ+ community in Swansea is a "labour of love" for Donna, who said it was her husband and his experience as a transgender man that inspired her to be a champion for inclusion in the area. "The community needs a voice, there needs to be more acceptance and we need more education," said Donna. "These groups are so important and vital in the community."
Donna also runs the transgender support group, Sadies Butterflies, which was set up four years ago and started the "cuppa and chat" sessions in partnership with Swansea Council in February last year, as part of the council's Ageing Well work.
Swansea Council's Ageing Well co-ordinator Rhys Thomas said: "These sessions are a lifeline for a lot of people. We have people coming every week and we're seeing around 30 people just in the morning sessions. There's definitely a need for it."
Read next:
- 'It should never have taken me until university to feel at least mostly accepted by society'
- Norena Shopland: The woman who has dedicated her life to uncovering Wales' LGBTQ+ history
- 'I felt panic and anxiety every time my baby was out of my sight and thought it was normal but I had postnatal depression'
- The Italian family who started with nothing and created a fish and chip shop empire in a small Welsh town
- How Swansea community was shaken to its core by fatal explosion
