Former X Factor finalist Janet Devlin has revealed her eating and alcohol troubles left her feeling that she would not live past 20.
The Northern Irish singer-songwriter finished fifth on the 2011 series of the ITV talent show - the same year Little Mix sprang to prominence.
But while she won praise for her performances on the show, she was struggling with private health battles - which she has opened up about in the Sun.
She said that she felt a wave of emotion when turning 30.
She said: "I absolutely bawled my eyes out on my birthday because, you know, there was a period in my life where I couldn’t see [living] past 20.
"Luckily, I did – and turning 30 was just the best feeling in the world, because I believe it’s a blessing to grow older. Not everybody gets that privilege.”
Devlin has recently released her fourth album Emotional Rodeo and thinks her best music yet is down to her developing maturity as an artist and a person.
She has come a long way since the X Factor, but has now shared that her struggles began well before her time on the show.
In an interview with OK magazine, she added: "I’d love to say the show heightened my issues; that would be an easier narrative!
"But I had a wealth of mental health issues before. I already had an eating disorder, self-harmed and had quite a bad relationship with alcohol because of the relationship I was in at the time.
"So, the show was what I needed; I needed something to get me out of bed and to work towards."
Another breakthrough was to receive a diagnosis for borderline personality disorder, a condition which impacts a person's ability to manage their emotions.
"Oh my gosh, the freedom I felt when I got that diagnosis,” she added.
“It was really helpful. I knew I was not a bad person. I have this condition that is notoriously hard to deal with, and I’m dealing with it the best way I can.
"Then I was able to go and get the help necessary because I’d been fishing in the dark before.”
