Christmas is the time of the year when families gather to celebrate and spend time together. At the same time, all families have members that attend these gatherings despite not being wanted there for various reasons.
In this story, the unwanted family member ended up being this woman whose sister vented online about not wanting her over during Christmas. Then, when netizens asked the OP to name what was actually so bad about her sibling, she started rambling about a difficult personality, but it didn’t convince all online folks, which turned the post’s theme from a Christmas party to a rivalry between sisters.
More info: Mumsnet
Despite Christmas being a family celebration, sometimes not all family members are wanted there
A woman came online to complain about how her sister coming to Christmas with her two kids is going to be too much for their parents in their mid 70s
She implies that it would be better if her sister didn’t come, as she has other social circles she could spend Christmas with
Netizens noticed how unwelcoming to her sister the woman is and called her out on it
Image credits: Birminghamx
This made the woman start defending herself, explaining how difficult her sister was ever since her teen years and into adulthood
The OP is one of three siblings. A few years ago, she and her elder brother hosted Christmas for their family. Basically, they took the hosting wheel over from their parents, who had been doing it for decades, even though their health is decently good.
Last year, as the author put it, her sister also “invited herself” to these parties for a 5-day stay. During it, her kids, one 5 months old and the other 2 years old, were fussy and tired everyone out. For instance, the OP’s mom’s friends reported the woman cancelled her engagements for a couple of days after the stay with the family.
The reasons why kids are fussy can be numerous, from lack of sleep, hunger to frustration. The OP didn’t specify any of them, just wrote that they were fractious without any more context.
Now, this year, the sister told her family she wants to come again, but her siblings think it’s unfair, as she would not only cause a commotion, but would occupy a space too. Sounds a bit harsh, doesn’t it? Well, the thing is that neither the OP’s, nor her brother’s places are big enough to host all the family members.
The parents aren’t against their daughter coming to a family party at their place. The woman is a single mom and accepting her is a nice and even helpful thing to do.
Plus, her place is way too small to host a party at all. Yet, don’t think she’s living poorly – the reason for her place’s size is because she lives in an expensive part of London. For a better understanding of the prices, currently the average annual rent in this city costs £26,316. Not cheap, is it?
So, while the parents are okay with hosting a party with their daughter and her kids attending, their other kids aren’t okay with it. They want to convince them to change their decision, as in their opinion, this situation is too demanding of them.
When netizens brought up that it seems like the OP and her brother are campaigning against their sister for no reason, the author provided some more context.
She went on and on about how her sister is a difficult person to deal with, who sometimes throws tantrums, gets in fights with basically everyone in her life, and so on.
At some point, the author and her mother have even researched autism and personality disorders hoping to get some “explanation” for the woman’s actions. While their intentions of researching what could be troubling her might be well-intended, taking it upon themselves to “diagnose” her isn’t.
After all, they aren’t mental health professionals who can diagnose anyone; they’re simply people who Googled symptoms and tried applying them to a person they know. Therefore, it’s possible that while they deemed some symptoms applicable to their family member, an expert would have a different opinion.
In addition to all that, some netizens pointed out that maybe the story from the OP’s sister’s point of view might sound different. For instance, the author describes her sister as having a happy childhood, but maybe her difficulties in keeping up relationships with other people would signify something else.
In the end, the post that started with a woman asking if it would be unreasonable to convince her parents to uninvite her sister from Christmas turned into a reality check from netizens against the author’s bias.
And while the original poster tried defending her position in the comments, at the end of the day, it still looks like there might be some underlying issues going on in that family. Not to sound too naive, but maybe the online folks’ reaction will be something that forces them to figure it out. Or bury it even deeper.
Still, even these explanations didn’t convince all netizens and left some with the impression that the woman has some kind of vendetta against her sister
