Person on Reddit sparks debate after asking if they are wrong for hiding their salary and job title from their boyfriend
(Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)Money is often one of the biggest factors that leads to couples breaking up.
Whether it’s due to the fact that one party feels like they are contributing more during the relationship than the other or vice versa—it’s never an easy conversation to navigate.
Even more so, it’s just plain uncomfortable to have to talk about something as transactional as wealth with someone you care about. The alternative, though, is almost always hidden resentment, resulting in heartbreak for all.
So when a person took to the popular Reddit forum AITA, an acronym for Am I the A**hole, to ask whether they were in the wrong for refusing to share their salary with their partner, people had some pretty strong thoughts.
“My bf and I have been dating almost a year and he doesn’t know how much I make. I’ve been taken advantage of financially by bfs in the past so I keep what I make and signs of any wealth out of sight,” the Reddit user’s post began.
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They then explained that they don’t “have a lot of obvious expensive things” that would hint at how much they have in their bank account but they do have a few expensive bags, clothes and other items. The Redditor’s boyfriend has yet to catch on though, as they typically leave the pricey items at their parent’s home.
“He isn’t wealthy. He’s told me he makes around 60k and I don’t feel like letting him know what I make. I pay more of our dates but I usually split it and we never go anywhere fancy,” they added.
All this secrecy though has resulted in a very frustrated partner.
“He’s been annoyed that I will never discuss money with him or really what I do for work,” they said, explaining that while they shared that their job is in tech, their boyfriend still doesn’t feel like it’s enough information.
They concluded, “I’m still trying to decide whether I should trust him with any more details around what I make since money immediately changes a lot of people’s behaviour. He’s gotten mad over this as he’s been trying to get me to disclose what I make and what exactly I do.”
Surprising, the reaction to the post have almost overwhelming been people declaring the Reddit user as the as***** in this situation.
“You've been dating a year and he doesn't know what you do? Maybe he suspects something underworldly. Set the man's mind at ease. If you can't trust him after a year, aren't you wasting both your and his time? And if he changes once he knows, then you may be waited too long to disclose,” read the top comment with 8.2K likes.
Another replied in agreement, “We all spend such a huge amount of much time at work, it's literally a part of us...I can't imagine never telling my partner how work was and what happened. Or what I'm doing in general.”
