Many people have learned firsthand that bullies can make school a living hell. Redditor ‘pasanquecosas’ was no exception, but for her, things took a turn for the better when one of the popular guys started to defend her.
He didn’t do that out of completely altruistic motives, though, as she was expected to take care of his homework. After graduating, they never spoke again, until one day he messaged her with a rather unexpected offer—he wanted to buy her a house.
Bullies can make one’s years in high school a living hell
Image credits: Towfiqu barbhuiya / unsplash (not the actual photo)
This redditor’s classmate would defend her from the bullies in exchange for her doing his homework
Image credits: Annie Spratt / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Jonas Leupe / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: pasanquecosas
Many school-aged children have had to face bullying, be it at school or online
Image credits: Keira Burton / pexels (not the actual photo)
It’s clear to anyone who’s ever stepped foot into a school that bullies can make the years there needlessly more difficult. And unfortunately, they do to quite many of their fellow students. Data from the US suggests that roughly one-in-five of students aged 12 to 18 have experienced bullying nationwide, usually by someone physically stronger or larger or by someone with more social influence or more money than them.
While the majority of bullying reportedly happens in the hallway and stairwell or the classroom, it tends to follow students outside, too, both on and off school grounds, ‘thanks’ to bullying online and over text. Pew Research Center emphasized that nearly half of US teens have experienced cyberbullying, and more than half of them say that it’s a major problem among kids of their age.
The grim statistics only prove that finding a bully is fairly easy, but stumbling upon someone who would ward them off is arguably far more difficult. Which is unfortunate, considering that having a defender can have a significant impact on the well-being of the person being bullied. Research suggests that defenders can mitigate the negative consequences of victimization by making the victims feel less anxious, less depressed, and increasing their self-esteem.
Acts of kindness can benefit both the receiver and the good doer themselves
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While the OP’s defender wasn’t exactly warding bullies off solely out of good will at the time, their “symbiotic” relationship seemingly benefited both sides. That might be one of the reasons the redditor didn’t feel like she “did something worthy of such gratitude”, as she pointed out in the comments, when she learned that her classmate wanted to buy her a house.
But such a gesture, too, can arguably benefit both sides—research suggests that kind deeds positively affect both the person on the receiving end and the good doer themselves. “Prosocial behavior—altruism, cooperation, trust and compassion—are all necessary ingredients of a harmonious and well-functioning society,” the lead author, research assistant professor at the University of Hong Kong, Dr. Bryant P.H. Hui, pointed out for the American Psychological Association. “It is part of the shared culture of humankind, and our analysis shows that it also contributes to mental and physical health.”
Moreover, the research suggested that a kind gesture of any proportion matters, as they add up to a significant impact at a societal level, and found that random acts of kindness seem to benefit people the most.
While the situation came as a shock to the redditor, it was seemingly well-thought out by her former classmate who paid for three years of her physical therapy when she politely refused the house—the same number of years she took care of his homework back in school. Fellow redditors seemingly paid notice to the fact and suggested that he knew exactly what he was doing, which is why they encouraged the OP to accept the classmate’s wholesome gesture of gratitude.
People in the comments shared their thoughts, they encouraged the OP to take the offer
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