The festive season is a time for families to come together, celebrate traditions and relationships, and ideally make happy memories. That being said, holiday burnout is a thing, and tensions can run high if there are unresolved issues between family members.
Having done it for 13 years running, one woman is sick of spending every Christmas with her husband’s family. She says the occasion has all the charm of a funeral parlor and often ends with her mother-in-law in tears. She went online to vent.
More info: Mumsnet
Christmas is meant to be a joyous occasion, but for this woman, it’s hell on earth
Image credits: stockboy / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Having spent the last 13 Christmases with her husband’s family, she doesn’t know if she can handle another one
Image credits: user25451090 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Apparently, her siblings-in-law are a nightmare to deal with and have a habit of leaving their mother in tears by the end of the special day
Image credits: DC Studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman spoke to her husband about it, but he said they’d spend the next Christmas at home or leave early if things got too bad
Image credits: Oopydoops
Dreading the occasion, the woman went online to ask whether or not she was being unreasonable in not wanting to spend another horrible Christmas with her hubby’s family
OP begins her story by telling the community that she and her husband have been together for 13 years and have two daughters aged 8 and 5. She adds that every year since she met her husband, they’ve spent Christmas with his family. Apparently, the past few years have been awful, mainly thanks to her toxic siblings-in-law.
She goes on to say that this will be the last Christmas spent in her husband’s family home because her mother-in-law is selling the house. OP says the thought of another Christmas spent in the company of her unpleasant siblings-in-law makes her feel sick, but her husband wants to be there to protect his mom.
OP says she wants to stay at home and possibly have her parents over but knows that her husband will put his foot down and leave her at home if need be. In an edit to her original post, OP adds that she and her husband used to split Christmas day between her husband’s family and her own, but that’s become too much for their kids to handle.
She says they’d always have her parents over on St. Stephen’s Day or the day after if OP had work, but she suspects her husband is so adamant on going because he knows his mother will be vulnerable to his sibling’s bickering and verbal abuse otherwise.
OP spoke to her husband who told her they could do Christmas at home next year, or up and leave if things with his family get too bad. OP concludes her post by telling the readers that she’s working this St. Stephen’s Day, so perhaps that’s making everything worse, but wonders if she’s being unreasonable to not want to have another horrible Christmas with her husband’s family.
Image credits: DC Studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
If you’ve ever experienced family friction during the holiday season, you’ll know just how much potential it has to ruin what should be a joyous occasion.
In some instances, it can even lead to holiday burnout, leaving family members emotionally exhausted by the pressure to put on a “perfect” celebration. So, how do you minimize the risk of an unpleasant outcome?
In her article for Psychology Today, Dr. Sherrie Bourg Carter suggests 7 smart strategies to avoid holiday burnout. A few of these include picking your priorities, pacing yourself, shopping online, avoiding overcommitting yourself, delegating, and being realistic with your expectations.
In her article for Healthline, Rachel Ray puts forward 5 ways to thrive with your chosen family during the holiday season. Some of these include setting boundaries when it comes to time constraints, locations, and who you spend the holidays with; being kind to yourself; honoring your emotions; and taking time to reflect on your personal accomplishments for the year.
From what OP tells us in her post, it would certainly seem like she needs to put her foot down with her demanding husband or at least set some ground rules before agreeing to another miserable holiday spent with her husband’s family.
What would you do if you found yourself in OP’s shoes? Do you think she’s within her rights to take back Christmas for her own sanity? Let us know your opinion in the comments!
In the comments, readers slammed the woman’s husband for his dictatorial stance and urged the woman to put her foot down and reclaim her Christmas
