Some folks say a happy home is a team effort, but it seems some husbands never got that memo. Often, that teamwork comes from the mom and a super-nanny rather than a wife and a husband. You know the type—those who think “family time” means covering the cost of Happy Meals while leaving everything else to the invisible “help.”
Meanwhile, the real heavy lifting is done by the nanny, who’s juggling everything from cooking and cleaning to helping with homework and managing school events. And that’s exactly our Redditor’s story, a mom who decided to replace her husband with a super-nanny.
More info: Reddit
Marriage is a team sport, but some husbands think the bench is the best seat in the house
Image credits: Benjamin Manley / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
One woman decided to replace her husband with a nanny, who does more for the family than her ex ever did
Image credits: karlyukav / Freepik (not the actual photo)
When the wife is away at work, the husband feeds the kids fast food, doesn’t clean the house or wash the kids’ clothes, and doesn’t even want them in the house
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The woman files for divorce and hires a nanny to help her with the kids, who does everything around the house
Image credits: MelodicGeologist2465
The husband wants his wife back, but she refuses, telling him the nanny does more for the family than he ever did
The OP (original poster) of this story married this guy, they had two kids, and he promised to be home every night by 5:30 or 6. But after hiring a nanny, the OP finds out that her husband was already home before her most days, kicking back with “me time” while making the nanny keep the kids at bay.
If he didn’t want to see his own kids, fine, but making them—and the nanny—stay in their rooms while he ignored them? Not a great look, Dad.
One time, the husband didn’t even want to open the door to let the nanny and his hungry kids into the house, because they would’ve disturbed his precious “me time.” The OP had to leave work early to let the kids into the house. Things got so bad that she finally reached her breaking point, filed for divorce, and moved out.
After the separation, the OP hired Amina, a 24-year-old super-nanny and mother of three herself, who’s been a total game-changer. Amina manages homework, makes delicious home-cooked meals, cleans, does the grocery shopping, organizes school events, and even goes clothes shopping for the kids. Basically, she’s a one-woman army, and she’s turned the OP’s house into a home.
Meanwhile, the soon-to-be ex-husband fed his kids McDonald’s and pizza for a week while the OP was on a work trip, and bought new clothes instead of running a load of laundry. Nice going, dude!
Now that the OP’s thriving with Amina’s help, her ex suddenly decides they’re better together “for the kids,” as if he’s had some grand epiphany. But when the OP rightly asks him why she’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than he ever did, he fires back that he “provides for them.” Right, because parenting is all about who makes more money.
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Not to mention, the OP has a full-time job too, with a similar income, so it’s not exactly like he’s the sole breadwinner here. But, of course, his family jumps in, claiming the OP is a “bad mom” for not wanting her kids to have “two parents.” Newsflash: Two parents are only beneficial when both actually want to parent.
Sure, having both parents in the same home can be beneficial, if both are equally engaged, that is. But the quality of parenting is far more impactful on a child’s well-being than the quantity of parents. It’s true that kids thrive in a stable family with two parents who love them, as long as they also love each other and there’s no conflict or abuse between them.
However, the pros say, “In the long term, divorce can lead to happier outcomes for children. When parents are arguing or incompatible in a deep and lasting way, divorce can be a relief for children, a chance to breathe healthier air, free of the tensions of an unhappy relationship.”
If both parents are under the same roof, children can sense when one parent is checked out. And the OP’s ex isn’t just checked out—he’s actively choosing to ignore his kids, leaving the real work to the nanny, then calling his ex-wife a “bad mom” when she decides she’d rather rely on someone who actually cares.
So, if OP’s ex really wanted to step up, he could start by building a real relationship with his kids—one that doesn’t involve pawning them off on grandma every weekend. Until then, maybe he should keep his “bad mom” remarks to himself.
To find out more about the situation, Bored Panda reached out to the poster for some comments. She told us that she and her ex-husband are currently not on speaking terms. She explained that her husband’s behavior only worsened over time, and that they had a few conversations about his role in parenting, where he promised to do more but never did.
We asked the poster how her kids responded to the nanny’s presence and what specific changes she has noticed since hiring her, in terms of both the children’s behavior and the general atmosphere in the home. The poster told us that her kids love the nanny and enjoy spending time with her, as she brings them to work with her.
The poster continued by saying that the nanny was able to get her kids to have a routine, which has significantly improved their behavior. She also created a relaxed environment in the house, by doing chores and helping the kids with the homework. “Now I get home to a clean house, food on the table, and homework done, allowing me to enjoy my time with my kids,” the poster explained.
We wanted to know how the poster handles conversations with her children about their father, especially given the tension around his lack of involvement. She told us that they haven’t had too many conversations about their dad, but they know he isn’t ready to be a partner or parent in the way they deserve.
What do you think of this story? Drop your comments below.
Netizens side with the woman, saying that her ex-husband is a jerk for not taking care of the kids
