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Wales Online
Wales Online
National
Vicky Castle & Neil Shaw

What Wetherspoon staff think about you, according to ex-employee

A woman who used to work in Wetherspoon has revealed secrets of what she says staff really get up to when they are at work, and what they are thinking about the customers. Vicky Castle used to work for a branch of the popular pub chain, reports KentLive.

She has put together a list of 21 behind-the-scenes secrets including what staff think when you try to get their attention, what they think of early-morning drinkers and what they think of Spoons toilets.

Vicky said: "My first ever proper job was at 'Spoons, but I won't tell you which Kent branch I worked in. I'll just share a few secret thoughts that I guarantee every former soldier on the nightlife frontline is having while they serve you."

1. I'm not asking you if you mind that it's Pepsi because I actually care

I just have to, it's the law. Besides, they taste exactly the same and you know it.

2. If you're queuing up at 9am for a pint of Ruddles I am judging you

Particularly if your Ruddles comes with a side of whisky.

3. If you have a strop about being ID'd you definitely will not be served

The paddy you're throwing is just highlighting how young you are. Get out, underage chancer.

4. I will quietly swear at you if you order a coffee at 10pm on a Friday night when it is six-deep at the bar

Don't expect it with a smile.

5. It's not cool when you come in and shout my name

I know you're mates with my mum, Sharon, but you're not getting your jug of WooWoo any quicker just because you're shouting my name.

6. I really don't appreciate it if you click or clap at me

And if you do, I will serve every single person in the whole town before I even acknowledge you are here. It does not work.

7. There is nothing quite as vile as the men's toilets in 'Spoons at 2am on a Saturday morning

What? How? What is wrong with you people?

8. We really don't get tips, ever

Instead you just get shouted at because John Smiths has gone up 2p.

9. If you are a regular, you probably have a nickname based on what you drink

Or what you get up to after having a few too many. That's right, bum-pinching Pete, we're watching you.

10. I curse you when you order drinks slowly and one by one

I can remember more than one drink at at time. And please don't wait until the end of the order to ask for a Guinness...

11. There is a definite hierarchy of cleaning jobs, depending on the time you've served on the frontline

If you are new, you will have to brass down and mop. If you've been there a while you can probably just bottle up and sit in the cellar while everyone else finishes cleaning.

12. When I am pretending to clean upstairs on a split shift, I am actually taking a nap on table 21 instead

Or under, depending how many people are upstairs.

13. Just. Remember. Your. Freakin. Table. Number

It's not that hard to remember, it's one number. No, don't just point in a general direction, that is not helpful.

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