CATFISHING is a term usually reserved for creeps pretending to be better looking than they really are, so its not often people get catfished by a children’s “winter wonderland” light extravaganza.
Pity the poor people of East Lothian, then, who recently suffered that rare insult when Enchanted Balgone rolled into town.
We’ve tracked down the promotional pictures that were released before the now-cancelled event welcomed its first visitors at the beginning of this month.
Organisers Enchanted Festivals have pulled the event, held at the Balgone Estate near North Berwick, after an avalanche of bad reviews and a scathing report in the East Lothian Courier in which a ripped-off mum called it an “absolute shambles”.
Santa
Promotional pictures released hoping to lure people to the event and part with their hard-earned cash promised a Santa who bears a striking resemblance to Richard Attenborough in Miracle on 34th Street.
What did they get?
A hands-less mannequin doing the famous “Tory power stance” wearing a piece of electrical tape for a belt.
In one picture, he is seen standing beside some festive palm trees and appears to be twice the size of a North Pole post box.
Light show
Attendees were advertised big impressive lighting set ups which would transport them to a slightly garish festive park.
Another picture showcased a light display which would illuminate nearby trees and reflect on a pond.
What did they get?
Something that looks like it came from a low-budget American slasher film from the 70s set at a cursed barn dance.
Or strings of lights illuminating a walkway that look like they were hung by a drunk person.
Meanwhile the star frame budget seems to have all been spent on Santa’s outfit so they have been replaced with A frames flanked by Children of the Corn-style fields.
Tunnel of lights
It’s not clear whether this made the final cut. The Jouker was unable to arrange an expensed trip to the winter wonderland so we have to rely on the East Lothian Courier’s pictures as evidence of this horrific artefact.
The tunnel of light doesn’t actually look that good, even in the promotional pictures. Perhaps a subliminal hint to potential marks to lower their expectations.
The only thing we have to compare it to is the dismal picture of the entrance. On the scale of things shown here, the enormous puddle on the left manages to look more inviting to the dark door highlighted with a sign saying “activities” written in blood-like spray paint. We’re not sure whether attendees were advised to wear wellies for their visit.
What has Enchanted Balgone got to say for itself?
A spokesperson for Enchanted Festivals said: "We are sad to announce the cancellation of Enchanted Balgone following disappointing feedback from some visitors.
"Our vision was to create a family-friendly Christmas experience in a stunning rural setting and while much of the event was wonderful, there were some shortfalls that we do not feel confident that we can address before the event this weekend.
"We would like to thank those who have attended and apologise to customers who will be disappointed by the cancellation, please be assured it was a difficult decision.
"Refunds will be issued automatically. Have a wonderful Christmas with your loved ones."
