I would like to thank all Guardian readers (Letters, 18 August) for reading the article about my son John Balson (The life and tragic death of John Balson: how a true crime producer documented his own rising horror, 14 August) and also for contributing so generously to the fundraiser set up to help his wife and daughters for the next few years.
Thank you, Sirin Kale, for your patience and understanding in telling his story. To say that we are heartbroken is an understatement. Our hearts have been shredded, put into a blender and blitzed.
What John himself will miss is what hurts us the most. Hearing his daughter giggling as she splashed in the sea last week, hearing her voice as she asks when she can see Harry Potter. John always told her that she could watch the movies after she read the books – a while to wait for a three-year-old. She remembers things she did with her daddy and says that she still loves him even though he has died. Her voice is so like his voice. At least that is something left behind for us. He will miss the joy of seeing his new daughter being born – very soon, we hope. The list is endless.
If anyone is considering ending their life, please, please talk to someone. No other family should suffer this pain. There is help available.
Margaret Balson
Romford, London
• In the UK and Ireland, Samaritans can be contacted on freephone 116 123, or email jo@samaritans.org or jo@samaritans.ie. In the US, you can call or text the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline on 988, chat on 988lifeline.org, or text HOME to 741741 to connect with a crisis counselor. In Australia, the crisis support service Lifeline is 13 11 14. Other international helplines can be found at befrienders.org
