![The Battle of Bramall Lane in 2002.](https://media.guim.co.uk/4872f6e727f3a24f1418d048260f18919843ac57/0_95_1616_970/1000.jpg)
“During the Red Star v Maccabi Haifa match, Milan Pavkov entered the pitch in the 78th minute and scored an own goal in the 90th minute. Surely we’ve never seen a more catastrophic substitution before?” tweets @Terunoumi89.
Pavkov’s wretched own goal settled a cracking Champions League playoff, which had been heading for extra-time with the aggregate score at 4-4.
Incredible scenes last night as Milan Pavkov's last-minute own goal ensured Maccabi Haifa qualified for the Champions League group stages at the expense of Red Star Belgrade! 😮#UCL pic.twitter.com/n13KNVhSkH
— Football on BT Sport (@btsportfootball) August 24, 2022
Of course, sporting catastrophe is in the eye of the beholder, so we’ll leave it up to you to decide whether the following examples are better or worse.
“I imagine it can’t get much worse than what happened to Marco Etcheverry,” writes Jörg Michner. “Imagine the situation: your country, Bolivia, are playing their first World Cup since 1950, facing Germany in the opening game of USA 94. Despite being your country’s star player, you are starting on the bench having suffered a knee injury months before. Finally, in the 79th minute, you are subbed on with your team 1-0 down. Four minutes and two touches later, the ever-lovable Lothar Matthäus brings you down with a flailing arm and, after play is halted, you give him a harmless, arguably deserved yet unnecessarily petulant kick. The referee is having none of it and sends you off … Bolivia ended up losing, Etcheverry was suspended for their final two group games and never played in the World Cup again. Ouch.”
Fast forward to 2013, and St Johnstone’s Rory Fallon was sent off 35 seconds after coming on, for an elbow on Aberdeen’s Michael Hector. Rewind to 2002 and ‘ouch’ was the operative word at the Battle of Bramall Lane in 2002, when a couple of substitutes played unforgettable bit-part roles.
George Santos and Patrick Suffo being subbed on for Sheffield United in the 64th minute, both being sent off in the 65th minute and the match being abandoned shortly thereafter has to count. https://t.co/nWnMWpx8BJ
— country dude (@country_dude_) August 31, 2022
Next up, we have the curious case of the ineligible player. “Manny Omoyinmi came on as a substitute for West Ham for the last eight minutes of extra-time in the Worthington Cup quarter-final against Aston Villa in the 1999-2000 season,” begins Alun Thomas. “West Ham won on penalties after a 2-2 draw. However, the match was ordered to be replayed as Omoyinmi had played in the competition for Gillingham earlier in the season and was thus ineligible. West Ham lost the replay 3-1.”
Earlier this year, Didier Deschamps threw on Jonathan Clauss in the 79th minute to try and get France over the line in their Nations League tie against Croatia. Four minutes later, the defender clumsily brought down Andrej Kramaric in the area, and the forward converted the penalty to earn Croatia a draw.
In September 1992, Andy Comyn made an even quicker impact at the Baseball Ground:
Not shown in full here but Andy Comyn had come on as sub for Derby after this free kick was awarded, which makes it an own goal after around 5 seconds of “ball in play”. Crazy game - Derby 3 Bristol City 4https://t.co/rIkROufsqz
— Andrew McGill (@AndrewRMcGill) August 31, 2022
And finally, Jim Hearson has a new take on an old favourite.
Ali Dia's introduction as a sub was pretty catastrophic for Graeme Souness's reputation.
— Jim Hearson (@JimHearson) August 31, 2022
Players out-scoring teams over a season
“After six games, Erling Haaland is single-handedly ahead of 14 Premier League teams on goals scored,” writes Shaun Forster. “When was the last time a player finished the season with more goals than an entire team?”
It has happened in seven Premier League seasons, most recently in 2020-21. The most notable is probably 2017-18, when Mohamed Salah outscored three teams in his debut season at Liverpool.
2002-03 Ruud van Nistelrooy 25, Thierry Henry 24, James Beattie 23, Sunderland 21
2005-06 Thierry Henry 27, Sunderland 26
2007-08 Cristiano Ronaldo 31, Fernando Torres 24, Emmanuel Adebayor 24, Derby County 20
2013-14 Luis Suarez 31, Norwich City 28
2016-17 Harry Kane 29, Middlesbrough 27
2017-18 Mo Salah 32, West Bromwich Albion 31, Harry Kane 30, Swansea City 28, Huddersfield Town 28
2020-21 Harry Kane 23, Mo Salah 22, Sheffield United 20
We’ll level with you, we don’t have the will or time to go through the entire history of English top-flight football, hence the convenient 1992 cut-off. But it would be remiss not to mention Everton legend Dixie Dean, who scored a record-breaking 60 goals in the 1927-28 league season. Goals were easier to come by in those days, so he didn’t outscore any teams – the lowest scorers were Blackburn and Portsmouth with 66.
![James Beattie on his way to outscoring Sunderland in 2002-03.](https://media.guim.co.uk/02a11c10ba620d2b04efbbdcb00c17fee5e19451/0_0_1637_932/1000.jpg)
Do-doo-doo-doo …
“What is the first reference to a football club pulling off ‘the great escape’ by avoiding relegation from a seemingly doomed position?” asks Ralph Burns. “Presumably this expression was used for the first time after the film of the same name was released in June 1963.”
We don’t know whether it’s first time, but Stewart Beard has found a reference from May 1965. “In the Essex & Thurrock Gazette, the headline proclaimed ‘The Season of the Great Escape’,” he writes. “Grays Athletic of the Athenian League Premier Division had survived on the final day, by winning 5-2 at Walton & Hersham, having ‘from September until April lived with the threat of relegation hanging over them’.”
Knowledge archive
“I was recently watching the third Test between India and West Indies,” wrote Manas Phadke in 2011. “I was quite surprised to see Billy Doctrove (who is an umpire) sitting in a stand named after him wearing a Liverpool jersey and kissing the badge for the cameras. Are there any other umpires in international cricket (present or past) who have publicly pledged their allegiance to a football club?”
Roy Proctor was on hand with a few answers. “The most obvious cricket umpire to have a publicly acknowledged football affiliation is the incomparable Harold ‘Dickie’ Bird, who in an article for the Guardian in 2008 proclaimed: ‘I’ve supported Barnsley for 70 years so there’s no way I will miss this afternoon.’ The afternoon in question was an FA Cup quarter-final between the Tykes and Chelsea, a match that Barnsley won. Another umpire was Ian Gould, a wicketkeeper who played in goal for Slough Town and Arsenal, earning him the nickname ‘Gunner’. In July 2009, Gould became chairman of Burnham FC of the Southern Football League. And although I’m not sure which team he supports, the legendary West Indian umpire Steve Bucknor, like Gould, was a goalkeeper, playing for Jamaica at schoolboy level. He went on to be a referee and took charge of a World Cup qualifier.”
Can you help?
“Bournemouth sacked Scott Parker after four games of the Premier League season. Is that the quickest sacking of a manager who gained promotion in the previous campaign?” asks Michael Booth.
York City played last week at Maidenhead's York Road ground. Any other examples of teams playing away at grounds with their names? Windsor going to Windsor Park? Spain going to Spain Park? #ycfc
— George Davidson (@MrHenryGee) September 6, 2022
“What is the first instance of surname+ball to describe a manager’s football philosophy?” muses Daniel Marcus. “I thought it was ‘Sarriball’ but a friend pointed out that for a time Stoke played ‘Pulisball’. Are there any earlier examples?”
When Werder beat Dortmund in injury time on August 20th after losing 2-0 at 88 minutes, it was pointed out that this was the first such turnaround in Bundesliga history - and "the first in 13 years", or something to that effect, in big European leagues. What was the previous one?
— Yes, That's A Twitr (@yesthatsatwitr) August 31, 2022
“While we quite rightly like to chide our American cousins about the word ‘soccer’, we all know that our nation’s greatest shame is that it is in fact a British word,” begins Ethan Mackintosh. “To that end, I wondered if there have ever been any clubs in the UK who officially called themselves soccer clubs at any point in their history? Just typing out ‘soccer clubs’ feels like a criminal offence, I’m so sorry.”
Conor Coventry made his debut for West Ham vs. Man City in the 1st game of the season. The last time a player with a «league club surname» played in the PL was perhaps Reece Oxford (?) - incidently also for West Ham. Are there any other players in the PL era with club surnames?
— thisisntipswich (@thisisntipswich) September 6, 2022
“Have two managers ever swapped clubs?” asks Tom Solan.
@TheKnowledge_GU Has anyone scored more English top-flight goals in a calendar month than Erling Haaland did in August, with 9?
— Francesco Lopez (@FrankLopezCoach) September 2, 2022
Mail us your questions or tweet @TheKnowledge_GU.