It's big and blue and there's no missing the star attraction, Slip n Slide, at this year's Nottingham Beach. The Arrow, the largest inflatable urban waterslide in the UK, dominates Old Market Square.
At 55m long and 13m tall it towers over the sand, paddling pool, stalls and rides. And here I am about to give it a go. I can count the number of times in my life I've been on a waterslide on two fingers.
On one of those occasions a wardrobe malfunction as I splashed into the pool was the ultimate embarrassment. As work assignments go, this one fills me with dread. I'm not afraid of daredevil challenges: standing in the Globe of Death as motorbikes zigzaged around me and having knives flung my way were less daunting.
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Because I don't like heights it's right out of my comfort zone. I'd rather be trying out the latest restaurant or bar, feet safely on the ground.
It might be a breeze for some but the anxiety is real as I go into the changing room to swap my dress for a swimming costume and shorts. Wetsuits are available but there's no lockers so leave your valuables at home.
One of the assistants says to me: "Have you seen how high it is? I got to the top but I couldn't go down it." There's a time and a place for such comments and it's not just as I'm psyching myself to go on.
It's a beautiful warm, sunny day with blue skies and couldn't be more perfect weather for a dousing. Shame my stomach is in knots and my legs are shaking like a leaf.
I let a couple of young girls go ahead of me in the queue at the slide, not just out of politeness but as a delaying tactic. Sadly one is too short - you have to to have at least 1.17cms so she has to go on the smaller 7.5m Little John inflatable instead.
Sadly I'm short but still meet the required height limit, so there's no getting out of it. You can also be too tall to go on the inflatable. The maximum is 6ft 5in so for Nottingham YouTube star LadBaby, at a reported 6ft 8ins, I'm afraid it's a no go, mate.
On the whistle myself and an excited young lad clambers on. I'm not racing, just clinging on for dear life as I hoist myself up the 30 steps using the straps at the side. One plus point for height-haters is that it's undercover so you can't actually see the outside world or the tall office blocks nearby. Just focus ahead and carry on, I keep saying over and over.
Reaching the top is another matter. My heart is pounding so loud it might actually be heard over the bongs of the Council House clock. I wave to the photographer below that I'm about to descend, grit my teeth, close my eyes and go... whooshing down the slide. It's fast and furious and, before I've even had time to think about what I'm doing, I'm being sprayed with water and it's all over. I didn't make it into the pool at the end - there's more chance of that if you go down on a body board - but I still got a good soaking.
My heart's thumping even harder now but in a good adrenaline-pumping way. I can't deny by the end of it it was fun and I survived apart from a broken nail. Sometimes it's good to push yourself out of your comfort zone.
It's £12 an hour (or a tenner if you're a Nottingham city resident). All the kids (and some of the parents) are loving it. Sitting on the sidelines is Mary Gaskin, of Selston, who is watching her husband Adrian and children Matilda, 13, and Freddie, nine.
Mary said: "I think it's absolutely brilliant. It's probably one of the best things they've had here. It's very well organised and really good fun and safe. I daren't go on it, I'm scared of heights but they're all loving it.
"I think it's really good value for money considering how expensive things are these days." Matilda declared it "sick" as she splashed into the pool. Freddie said: "It's like a lightening bolt that strikes when you're going down."
Slip n Slide is open every day from 11am with the last admission at 5pm and it will be there for the duration of the beach, which runs until September 4
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