Here's an incredibly dull trivia question for you – how many Waitrose stores are there in Wales?
Fifty, you say? Lower. Thirty? Way lower. Ten? Getting closer, but still lower.
In fact there are just six – compared to more than 60 Lidl stores and 50 branches of Aldi across the country. Across the border in England there are around 300 Waitrose stores.
Read more: Find more supermarket stories right here
It begs the question – where on earth do the good people of Wales go when they need quail's eggs or artichoke hearts or organic rosemary and rock salt focaccia in a hurry?
Waitrose has, of course, long been the target of such mockery due to its reputation as the UK's poshest supermarket. A parody Twitter account with more than 15,000 followers posts conversations that you may overhear in the store from: "Don't you have any organic dog food?" to: "Mummy, does Lego have a T in it like Merlot?".
In 2018 the chain was also widely ridiculed for its list of 'essential' student storecupboard items – which included Swiss vegetable bouillon powder and organic cyder vinegar – while everyone was making similar jokes when the store's Queen Street branch in Cardiff closed down the previous year.
Earlier this year Waitrose was named the most expensive supermarket in the UK, with a Which? study finding that the average cost of 45 popular items in their stores was £68.69 – around 60% (or £26.02) more than a similar shop at Lidl.
But while a lot of the items on the shelves look frankly unnecessary – and their cost frightening – perhaps there's something to be said for a little bit of indulgence.
In search of answers I headed to the Pontprennau branch in Cardiff (the others are in Abergavenny, Monmouth, Cowbridge, Menai Bridge, and at Cardiff Gate services, FYI) to see if the fanciest items available at the store lived up to the hype.
The store
Arriving at the Pontprennau store on a Wednesday evening it wasn't too busy and parking was very straightforward.
It certainly didn't look much from the outside but, credit where it's due, there was a lovely selection of plants and flowers at the front of the store next to the hand sanitising station.
Inside it was light and airy and the colourful shelves were incredibly well-stocked given the recent shortages. Right by the entrance was a display of Waitrose's essential own-brand items – including bourbon creams and apricot wheats cereal – with prices as low as 30p for a pack of custard creams.
But I wasn't here to stockpile canned goods or pasta – I wanted extravagance. Here's what I bought and, crucially, whether or not it was worth its price tag.
The items
No.1 Mushroom and Truffle Sourdough Pizza - £6
The first of many items I tried from Waitrose's 'No.1' premium range, this pizza both sounds fancy and looks fancy – but lacks any real flavour.
It's nice enough, with a creamy salsa truffina béchamel sauce topping and a crispy base, but doesn't quite do enough to justify its £6 price tag or put it above less fancy pizzas available at discount retailers in the taste stakes.
Verdict: Not worth it
Christmas Black Truffle Hand Cooked Crisps - £2
Somehow Christmas is just around the corner – and I got in the festive spirit by sticking another truffled item in my shopping basket.
These crisps were full of flavour but their surprisingly intense sweetness meant I could only stomach a small handful. While they would be nice for a festive get-together when you realise you can get a tube of Pringles for 50p less at Asda it puts everything into perspective.
Verdict: Not worth it
Celeriac Remoulade - £2
It sounds like the name of a French lord but this is actually just posh coleslaw, essentially.
I felt pretentious eating it but, the truth is, it's really nice. Creamy, crunchy, and flavoursome – it is more than worth a couple of quid.
Verdict: Worth it
Roasted Beetroot and Mint Houmous - £1.60 (reduced to £0.59)
A frightening colour but just like the remoulade, this was another favourite item of mine.
Rich and refreshing, the houmous was definitely worth the 59p I paid for it (thanks to the much-loved yellow sticker) and just about justified its original £1.60 price tag.
Verdict: Worth it
No.1 Strawberry and Pink Champagne Preserve - £3.50
I wasn't sure how I felt about this jam before I put it in my basket and I wasn't impressed after spreading it on my morning toast.
Honestly it just tasted a bit weird, which I'm guessing was due to the pink champagne, as otherwise it just tasted like a standard strawberry jam with some sweetness missing.
At £3.50 it may the most overpriced item on this list. In fact, for the same price, I could buy three jars of strawberry jam from Lidl's Meribel range.
Verdict: Not worth it
No.1 Saint Marcellin cheese - £3
Not much to say here other than this was really, really nice. It was so smooth and so creamy that it was essentially some amazing cheese-butter hybrid.
Admittedly my judgement is impaired as frankly I would pay pretty much anything for any amount of cheese.
Three quid for 80g of the stuff? Take my money. I don't care. Cheese is the best.
Verdict: Worth it
No.1 Spiced Quince and Pear Relish - £2.75
Another item from the No.1 range, this worked well with the cheese but was pretty underwhelming on the whole.
If I'd done a blindfolded taste test I would have believed this was a standard Branston pickle as the flavour of the pear and quince was virtually non-existent.
Verdict: Not worth it
No.1 Rosemary and Gruyere puffs - £1.50
Crisp, flaky and nutty, these snacks are relatively cheap and nice enough – but, again, nothing special.
If you put them out in a selection of standard crisps and breadsticks (from Waitrose or other retailers) I wouldn't be surprised if they were the ones left behind.
Verdict: Not worth it
No.1 Three Cheese Macaroni - £4
You can't really go wrong with mac n' cheese but this was incredibly average to say the least.
It was tasty and a decent-sized portion but wouldn't stand out among a sample of other supermarket offerings.
Waitrose's premium range is beginning to feel like a bit of a rip-off.
Verdict: Not worth it
No.1 PDO Comte Cheese Saucisson Sec - £5
Made up of more words I don't understand than those I do, this is probably the fanciest item I bought.
While it's certainly chewy it's also very rich and full of flavour – and it would just about be worth it if it wasn't five whole pounds.
Verdict: Not worth it
No.1 Sicilian Blood Orange Juice - £3
Blood oranges are meant to have a lot of benefits over other oranges but I couldn't quite get over the bitter aftertaste.
There's nothing majorly wrong with it but I'd take standard orange juice every time.
Verdict: Not worth it
No.1 Salted Caramel Miso Brownie - £3
Probably the most disappointing item of the lot.
It promised a lot but in the end it came out a squishy mess that was very rich but also very claggy and not that exciting. I couldn't even taste the salted caramel, which is not a great sign.
Three pounds is not a bad price for a dessert like this but you can get cheaper at Sainsbury's and Tesco – let alone Lidl or Aldi.
Verdict: Not worth it
No.1 Milk Chocolate with Feuilletine and Salt - £2
I'll admit it – I had to Google what Feuilletine was. It's wafer in case you're wondering.
The chocolate was very rich but not unpleasant – although I just don't get the point of adding the salt. Apparently it's meant to bring out the flavour of the chocolate but really I think it just makes it saltier. There's no need.
I'll just have a Twix I think.
Verdict: Not worth it
The overall verdict
In total the above 13 items came to £38.34 – averaging just under £3 per item.
None of it was unpleasant – in fact a lot of it was nice – but most of the food wasn't good enough for it to justify its high cost.
Surprisingly it was the cheaper items – those not in the No.1 range, including the houmous and the remoulade – that were the tastiest overall while those in the premium range were not great value at all and tasted no different to their equivalents at other supermarkets.
Having made a fairly sizeable dent in my bank account it's safe to conclude that Waitrose's fanciest items are, on the whole, not worth it – and that the supermarket won't be shaking off its reputation anytime soon.
Whether it's food and drink, shopping, news or reviews you're after then make sure you never miss a beat. Get the latest email newsletters from WalesOnline by clicking here.
