Wayne Barnes has revealed he considered walking away from refereeing after his wife and children were subjected to online threats following South Africa's loss to France in November.
Barnes took charge of his 100th Test match as France overcame the Springboks in Marseille but the game was quickly overshadowed by the actions of Rassie Erasmus, the South Africa director of rugby, post-match. Erasmus posted a series of video clips on Twitter that appeared to highlight decisions by Barnes that went against South Africa.
He would later receive a suspension from World Rugby. However, Barnes and his family became the target of online abuse - with the referee even reporting two perpetrators to the police. Speaking publicly about the abuse for the first time with The Good, The Bad and The Rugby podcast, Barnes said that his wife, Polly, was threatened with “sexual violence”.
“Criticism on social media quickly becomes abuse,” Barnes said. “That is the world we live in. That is social media. But I make the decision to be a referee, make the decision to be on social media. Polly, my wife, doesn’t make the decision to be a referee.
“On the Saturday night, there started to be some direct abuse at Polly. Then, the following two or three days, there was direct abuse to Polly, threats of sexual violence and threats against the kids.
“That takes it to a different level. When you’ve done 100 games, you think you can prepare for most things. You can’t prepare for that.
“I don’t mind people criticising my performance and, if they want to abuse me directly, that’s their choice. But that wasn’t just a line that was crossed. You couldn’t even see the line, it had gone that far. It affects you and it affects your family.”
When asked if he believed Erasmus' actions had contributed to the level of abuse his family received, Barnes said: “I don’t know the answer to that.
"What I would say is that if people see people in positions who are meant to uphold the values of our game openly criticising referees then it allows others to say, ‘People in positions of power can criticise, why can’t I?’”
He also revealed he had contemplated packing in refereeing due to the abuse his family received.
“I sacrifice, but it’s a family sacrifice and you do think, ‘I’ve got this other decent job to go to. I’m a partner at a law firm and they’re keen for me to come back full-time’,” he told the podcast. “Of course you question it, and that’s a constant conversation you have with your family.”
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