Come October, I am in my element. Layers? Fifteen-denier tights? Hot chocolate? Gilmore Girls? One-pot recipes? Red (Taylor’s Version)?
But there’s one thing about this time of year that actually frightens me: the shorter days caused by daylight saving. And the reason I’m scared? Because I’m a woman.
When the clocks go back, our fears for our safety go up in direct proportion, as we are forced to navigate poorly lit streets and parks on our way home (or simply stay indoors).
My mum is a cleaner at a school and ordinarily starts her days around 3am. But at least in the summer she has natural light to guide her journey to work. In the autumn and winter, seeing as the local council has decided to turn off street lights between 1-5.30am, she has no choice but to ride her bike in total darkness – and it terrifies me.
Even my journey home at 6pm can sometimes feel sketchy. Yes, for the most part I am on public transport, but my commute also includes a walk during which I’m so much more aware of footsteps behind me and shadowy pathways that could be concealing someone.
Like many women, I dial the volume down on my headphones, grip my keys in between my fingers and avoid eye contact at all costs – and that’s all before I even get to go “out-out”.
I could be having a whale of a time with my friends, but the minute 9pm strikes, I start to feel anxious about my journey back and find myself shooting glances at the clock, unable to fully relax and escape in the moment. There’s a sort of self-imposed curfew on me that prevents me from staying out of an evening and revelling in the fun.
When I get back, the fear doesn’t necessarily leave me either. I’m all too aware that I shouldn’t turn the lights on when I get in, or go over to the window to draw the curtains when I’ve entered my building moments before. Why? Because you never know who’s followed you or who is looking in from the darkness, watching your every move.
It also bugs me that my neighbours double-lock the front door. No doubt it makes them feel safer inside, but it sends me into a total panic when I have to mess around with the lock when a guy is approaching or has followed me from the station (yes, it happens).
I might sound paranoid, but this is very much the reality. In fact, one in two women feel unsafe walking alone after dark, regardless of whether they’re in a busy area or not.
Rationally, I know 9pm isn’t late. I know that I should be free to stay out and not worry about ending up in a ditch somewhere. I should be able to lose myself in my music and not worry about being stalked. I should be able to go about my business and not play out worst-case scenarios in my head.
And not that I ever have, but if I want to go on a late-night run, I should be able to do just that, free of fear.
So, here’s a thought: scrap daylight saving time. It’s antiquated, unnecessary – and dangerous.
