After Olive Gully's husband was killed in a robbery gone wrong, she spent more than a decade being angry.
She wanted answers, and she wanted them from the man who did it.
"I wanted him to tell me his story," she said.
"I wrote a letter to him and he had the shock of his life."
Security guard Jason Gully was shot dead by Wally White during a robbery in Keysborough, in Melbourne's south-east, in 2004.
White was sentenced in 2008 to 26 years in prison, with 20 years non-parole.
In Ms Gully's letter to White, she asked if they could meet. She wanted to come to the prison where White was serving his sentence.
To her surprise, he agreed, so Ms Gully began a six-month process of getting permission from the prison to visit him, which she undertook with a specially trained support worker.
The process where perpetrators and people harmed by crime have a facilitated interaction about the impact of the offence, and reach a level of reconciliation, is called restorative justice.
Ms Gully remembers the day she finally got to go see White in February 2020.
"The weather was so kind to us through this beautiful day," she said.
She described the meeting as "divinely perfect timing", as both her and White were in a clear headspace to meet each other.
Ms Gully said she explained to White what it meant to lose her husband and the father of her child.
She said he listened, explained what led up to the day, and apologised for the grief he caused her. All up, they spoke for four hours.
"We cried together," Ms Gully said.
"We had lots of tears, we released a lot of pain, and then we made peace."
Restorative justice allows people to 'tell their story'
RMIT's Open Circle is the only community-based program in Victoria offering restorative justice in response to crimes committed by adults.
Open Circle manager Nareeda Lewers said there were a range of reasons people harmed may want to take part in restorative justice.
"They might want to tell their story their own way, not constrained by rules of evidence or legal processes," she said.
"I've heard people harmed say, 'One life has been lost, and we can't change that. I don't want two lives lost, so I don't want you to feel so consumed with guilt that your own life spirals.'"
She said the restorative justice process was not suitable for everyone, but some people harmed saw it as a way of ensuring accountability.
To increase its availability, Ms Lewers would like to see the state government put money towards training restorative justice practitioners, and to raising awareness about the services on offer.
Victorian prisons expanding restorative justice programs
The Victorian Department of Justice launched an expansion of its own program last week, which provides restorative justice services for people on the Victims Register and adults in prison or on parole.
A Department of Justice spokesperson said restorative justice was always optional, and a panel must be satisfied all parties are suitable to take part before they meet.
"Restorative justice services are initiated by victim-survivors and can provide a way to have safe conversations that can help to address harms and support healing," they said.
"Extensive planning and a range of assessments are completed ahead of any conferences, including participation suitability to ensure that no further harm will be caused to victims or any party involved."
The state government also offers a program for victims of family violence.
Aside from these, restorative justice for adult offenders in Victoria is only available through Open Circle and individual specialists like the one Ms Gully worked with.
Attorney-General Jaclyn Symes said the Victorian government had "provided record levels of investment to better support victims of crime".
"We are continuing to consider ways that these programs can be further developed and expanded upon in the future, including through the development of the 10 year whole of government strategy to prevent and address sexual violence, abuse and harm," she said.
Tracy felt 'nothing' when her daughter's boyfriend was sentenced
Tracy Larsen's world was torn apart when her 15-year-old daughter Georgia was killed in a car crash.
In February 2018, Georgia's 18-year-old boyfriend Joshua Lewis was driving her to school in Longwarry, south-east of Melbourne.
Mr Lewis swerved off a gravel road into a tree, killing Georgia.
He did not have a licence, so was sentenced to four years in a youth prison, serving 18 months before he was released.
The sentencing brought no respite to the grief Tracy and her husband Shannon felt.
"I remember Shannon and I both walking out just like, it's just nothing, like he could have got 20 years or one year and it wouldn't have made any difference to us," Ms Larsen said.
Through their court liaison, the Larsens heard about Open Circle.
A year and a half later, in December 2020, the Larsens were driving to prison to visit Mr Lewis.
"At the time, I was thinking, what are we doing? Like, why are we doing this to ourselves? We've been through so much," Ms Larsen said.
It was a daunting process, despite the careful counselling the Larsens and Mr Lewis had been through with Open Circle to determine what they wanted the meeting to look like.
"As soon as my husband saw him, he just hugged him. It's something I will never, never forget," Ms Larsen said.
They spoke for two and a half hours, and unlike in the trial, Ms Larsen finally felt like she had a voice.
"It gave us the power to ask the questions we wanted to in our way, and for him to understand the impact that it had," she said.
Mr Lewis said he read out a letter explaining "how sorry" he was, and how he blamed himself entirely for the crash.
"I didn't think I'd be able to speak because I was so nervous," he said.
Mr Lewis said he suffered post-traumatic stress and was filled with guilt after the crash, so hearing the Larsens say they wanted the best for him was life-changing.
"That was like a big thing for me, that OK, maybe my life isn’t worthless," the now 22-year-old said.
"It's a relief sort of feeling."
Restorative justice should be legislated, experts say
The Victorian Law Reform Commission tabled a report in state parliament in November last year recommending the government provide a legislative framework for restorative justice, including for sexual violence, chair Anthony North said.
"We got very powerful stories from people who had experienced sexual offending, about how sitting down and talking to the perpetrator in particular just released a lot of the burden of their experience," he said.
Mr North said restorative justice initiated by victim-survivors could offer an alternative to criminal trials.
"The criminal justice system often doesn't give justice to victims-survivors, not every victim-survivor wants the perpetrator to go to jail — particularly where the perpetrator is a family member," he said.
In its submission to the commission's report, Sexual Assault Services Victoria said "options for restorative justice should be available and promoted to clients".
"Often a [victim-survivor] may just want the perpetrator to understand the impacts of their behaviour, acknowledge the crime and/or offer an apology," the peak body said.
"They may not necessarily want the offender to serve jail time.
"An offender's participation needs to be motivated by genuine victim empathy."
Ms Lewers said she hoped the commission's recommendation was implemented, in particular so restorative justice was not only available post-sentencing.
"I think that having that legislative basis is key to making it more available and to making it something that's a regular feature of the criminal justice system," she said.
Mr North said there was evidence restorative justice could reduce recidivism rates.
In a Swinburne University study of youth offenders, participants were 41 per cent less likely to reoffend after going through restorative justice.
'You get tired of getting angry'
For Ms Larsen, grief will always be part of her life, but she no longer feels hatred.
"It doesn't mean that the grief is any less, it just means that you don't have that added burden on top of what you're already going through," she said.
"[Josh] had some really great plans to move forward and be a normal person in society, and that's all we wanted."
Ms Gully said not everyone harmed by crime would want to meet the offender, but it helped her find solace.
"You get tired of getting angry," she said.
"It's a huge weight off my shoulder — I dropped it off at prison and walked out light.
"Forgiveness doesn't change my past, but it frees me for a better future."
