Vicky Pattison has shared an honest post about her day 'getting the better of her' prior to her very personal documentary airing. The reality star has opened up about her binge drinking past in her new one-off Channel 4 programme, Vicky Pattison: My Dad, Alcohol and Me.
She recalled being used "as a human walking stick" by her dad John as his drinking became worse and admitting to becoming "frightened" at the idea of his alcoholism being passed on to her. Ahead of the film airing on Tuesday night (August 2) Vicky bravely took to Instagram after months of "spending the last month talking about things that I've kept bottled up for years."
The 34-year-old shared a snap of herself looking tearful in the bathroom, alongside a string of snaps of her magazine and newspaper articles and TV appearance as she promoted her alcohol addiction documentary.
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"Today got the better of me…" Vicky began her emotional post. "I’ve spent the last month talking about things that I've kept bottled up for years- in the hopes that people will watch my documentary tonight and understand a little bit more about addiction and alcoholism.
"But I'd be lying if I said it hasn't left me completely emotionally exhausted. Every interview I did I grew closer and closer to tears." She went on: "I went and hid in the toilets at the BBC today and had a little cry after my chat- which I'd been threatening to do all day if I'm honest with myself.
“If this documentary helps just one person feel less alone or brings one family closer together I'll consider it a job well done. And honestly, I don't regret a single thing, I'm proud of the show, so proud of my dad and finally I feel more in control of my life and future than I ever have before. But all of that still doesn't stop me from wishing things were different sometimes... and I know I'm not the only one who feels that way.
"I hope you all get something from the show tonight. I hope it brings you some clarity and peace and more than anything I hope it helps you understand what those struggling with addiction and those that love them have to face on a daily basis."
The former Geordie Shore star was quickly flooded with support from her celebrity pals and loyal followers. Former Bake Off winner Candice Brown said: "So proud of you angel." Former Love Island star Faye Winter replied: "You’re an incredible soul and we will be watching."
Former TOWIE star Samantha Faiers wrote: "Very brave Vicky xxxx excited to watch," while her sister Billie added: "Really looking forward to watching tonight. Lots of love darling." Fans, meanwhile, called Vicky 'brave' and while sharing their pride for the star.
The documentary was also well received with many flocking to social media to share their thoughts.
Following an appearance on BBC Breakfast on Wednesday morning (August 3) and a tearful chat on This Morning on Tuesday, Vicky has joked on Instagram: "Wondering if their is a TV programme that I haven't cried on yey?" She then added: "I think no!"
She has since shared a fresh post to social media. Alongside a picture of her embracing her dad, Vicky spoke about how recovery 'is not a race' before adding: "I am forever grateful to @channel4 and @firecrackerfilms for taking a chance on me and allowing me to and my dad to make this documentary. I had a firm belief that this documentary needed to be made, that it would help people, make people feel less alone... I had no idea that it would end up saving me from myself.
"Thankyou everyone for your gorgeous messages of support and kindness- I knew this was going to resonate with people but I genuinely had no idea how many people have been affected by alcoholism- it just further reaffirms my belief that we need to talk more openly and candidly about addiction and our experiences with it."
She ended with a poignant message to her dad, John, writing: "Finally I just wanted to say that I love my dad more than anything in the world and I'm so proud of him for being for honest, raw and above all else incredibly brave. You're amazing @johnpattison58."
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