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Irish Mirror
Irish Mirror
Entertainment
Janine Yaqoob & Susan Knox

Vanessa Feltz's ex claims he's homeless after she threw him out over sexting and flirting

Ben Ofoedu has claimed that he is now homeless after ex-fiancée Vanessa Feltz kicked him out of their home after he confessed to sleeping with an older woman in Ibiza while Vanessa was at home.

Vanessa's ex-partner of 16 years, admitted to a secret sexting relationship with a fan of his pop band Phats and Small - and he further betrayed Vanessa by getting flirty with a woman he met at a Butlin's holiday camp.

The revelations come days after it emerged TV host Vanessa has dumped Ben after 16 years together.

Singer Ben now tells Sunday Mirror how he had sex with an older woman in Ibiza three times behind Vanessa’s back and kept the infidelity a secret for months.

Describing the illicit encounters as a 'chore', Ben, 50, says distraught Vanessa, 60, later discovered he’d been playing away while gigging abroad - but she eventually forgave him.

Vanessa Feltz's ex claims he's homeless after she threw him out over sexting and flirting (Phil Harris)

The couple then kept the betrayal secret for eight years, with them only coming to light this week.

Speaking of his devastation at losing the 'love of his life', Ben lifts the lid on the extent of his betrayal for the first time.

Ashamed Ben said: “I’ve broken her trust. She gave me another chance. I’ve gone and destroyed that.”

Seven weeks ago, on Christmas Day, This Morning agony aunt Vanessa discovered Ben had been sexting a younger female fan who sent him naked pictures on Instagram.

And we can reveal how another woman contacted Vanessa to say he said something sexually suggestive to her at a Butlins gig in December.

Ben has held his hands up and admitted to doing wrong (Phil Harris)

It was the last straw for mum-of-two Vanessa - whose ex husband Michael Krurer cheated on her - who told Ben to leave their £3.5million north London home.

“So many people have been hurt, not just Vanessa. I was so close to her grandchildren, her daughters, their husbands. We’re a close knit family. My family have been appalled by it as well. There’s been a lot of pain," Ben told.

Meeting through mutual friends in 2001, the pair began dating in 2005 and were engaged the following year.

Although their romance appeared to be perfect, last year, as Ben dealt with the ill health and subsequent death of his much-loved brother Roy, he turned to drink and began pulling away from Vanessa.

Vanessa and Ben had been together for 16-years (Ken McKay/ITV/REX/Shutterstock)

In the spring he struck up an initially innocent friendship with a fan over social media. But it eventually turned into more, leading to suggestive messages and nude pictures.

Nine months of messaging up to three times a week - Vanessa caught sight of them on Christmas Day while Ben was in panto in Southsea, Hampshire, and later called him out.

“Vanessa saw the messages,” he told. “I was sex texting somebody. It was the last straw. It’s well documented that Vanessa’s been hurt before in marriage, by infidelity, and she couldn’t take anymore.”

“The sexting came about from a woman that was following me on Instagram. She started complimenting me and we built a friendship. She first messaged about nine months ago. We’d message once a week, then twice, three times a week, then a nude.

"I never sent one back. She said ‘Oops, sorry’. I should have blocked her but I didn’t. I said ‘It doesn’t matter’.

Ben knows he has done wrong by Vanessa (PA)
Ben says he will never forgive himself (PA)

"She asked me what I thought and I didn’t answer. A week later another one came through. Then we’d sent flirty messages back and forth. When you’re in a relationship you shouldn’t be talking to someone who your other half doesn’t know about. I can’t justify it, I knew I was in the wrong.

"I felt guilty but it was a light hearted relief and distraction which turned into a monster and destroyed my life.”

Ben says he has been doing lots of soul searching since Vanessa split with him three weeks ago and he has since been living with a church friend in London.

“I don’t know why I did it,” he sighed. “Someone will tell me one day. I’m still processing it. It’s still fresh. I should have got some help after the first dalliance. I knew there was an insecurity. But I papered over the cracks and if you don’t tackle something it reared its head.

“I cheated because I was insecure."

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