GLENDALE, Ariz. – After walking away from the promotion he called home for nearly a decade, Uriah Hall found himself in a very dark place.
Hall, a former UFC middleweight contender, became familiar with households on Season 17 of “The Ultimate Fighter” in 2013. After 19 fights with the promotion, Hall decided it was time to hang up the gloves and walk away from MMA in August.
However, that move left him with more questions than answers, and depression began to set in. While alone in his home, Hall admits he had thoughts of taking his own life as the uncertainty of his future became a massive burden.
“I was in a weird place,” Hall told reporters including MMA Junkie during a media scrum at the open workouts for Paul vs. Silva. “After leaving MMA, man, I fell into a really deep hole. If I could talk about it, I fell into a deep depression. A lot of athletes, when you do something for so long, that’s what you identify as, you know? You’re a football player only or you’re a fighter only. People don’t see that when you walk outside you’re like, ‘Wait, there’s nothing else for me to do?’
“I spent the last 20 years of my life committing myself, my soul to one attribute, and then all of a sudden it’s gone, it’s taken away. So, it was some really dark, deep places, and luckily I had the right people around me to support me.”
Thankfully, Hall did not see those dark thoughts through, and was able to deliver his message just days ahead of stepping into the boxing ring to face former NFL standout Le’Veon Bell. The bout will be the co-main event ahead of Anderson Silva vs. Jake Paul at Desert Diamond Arena.
Hall admits boxing was not on his radar after leaving MMA, but the challenge presented itself and he took it, perhaps for the best to keep his competitive juices flowing.
“When I say I felt depressed, I even at one point looked at my firearm,” Hall said. “Like, wait a minute, I can go down a really dark path if I don’t get out of this. And people don’t talk about that sh*t.
“Depression is a real thing, and if you don’t have the right support group, support system, you won’t get out of it, man. If you look at like Robin Williams and all those types of people, you’re like, ‘How the f*ck did you kill yourself?’ I get it. Like, at that moment, I finally f*cking understood. … I sat on my couch for literally a week straight not knowing what to do. I remember opening the door for the first time seeing sunlight, I was like, ‘What the f*ck.'”
The UFC offers athletes access to remote therapy to address mental heath care concerns through the UFC Performance Institute, however, it is unclear if that service extends to retired fighters.
With a fresh challenge just days ahead in his pro boxing debut, Hall is glad he had the right people around him and the new venture to help pull him out of his dark place.
“It was really dark and I’m just so happy to get out of that,” Hall said. “I encourage people, I know it’s hard to even talk about it or talk to someone about it, but I know activeness does something. Literally, by me just getting up and just walking outside, it helped my mentality.”
For complete coverage of the card, check out MMA Junkie’s event page for Paul vs. Silva.
