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Daily Mirror
Daily Mirror
Beth Kilgallon & Danielle Kate Wroe

UK's most unconventional parents' say they won't teach their children to read or write

When you're a parent, the likelihood is that you'll want your kids to have the best start in life, and to many, this looks like teaching your little ones to read and write when you feel like they're old enough.

But the UK's most 'unconventional parents' don't agree with the traditional methods of bringing a child up. They let their three children make the decisions, don't believe in the healthcare or education systems, and they prefer to 'unschool' them as they believe in child autonomy.

Adele Allen, 39, from Brighton, and her husband Matt say they don't force their kids Ulysses, 12, Ostara, eight, and Kai, four, to read and write.

Instead, they're encouraged to make their own choices about what they want to know more about through Adele's unique approach.

The children don't have a fixed schedule, bedtime, or mealtime, and the parents believe their unconventional parenting method gives their kids more sense of identity as they are not doing what others tell them to.

Adele, a stay-at-home mum, said: "We got into natural living before we had our kids, so it just became a natural progression that continued and began to affect all of our decisions after I fell pregnant.

"I didn't have any medicalised births, and we started doing things alternatively and out of this system, but they just didn't make sense to us.

"We didn't do vaccinations for our kids, which people say is cruel of us, and we don't use the healthcare system. Instead, we use natural and herbal remedies.

"We also don't use the education system. Instead, we unschool our kids. This means they have to show an interest in something for us to explore it with them, instead of following a curriculum and telling them what they are going to learn.

"We believe in child autonomy and enabling kids to take governance of their life, make their own choices, and decide what goes on in their life rather than dictating to them.

"However, this doesn't mean no guidance. It's just about involving them in the decisions.

"We don't believe it is up to the parents to choose what kids do. We follow our kids' passions and what makes them happy and then just go with that.

"For example, our daughter Ostara started to show an interest in sewing so we bought her a sewing machine and some lessons, and we'll take that as far as she wants to take it.

"We just follow their lead. If they want to do a club and try a new group for a little bit, we just provide that for them.

"Our eldest, Ulysses, is more of an animal and computer person so we take him on trips to sea life centres and animal parks."

Adele believes that children will pick up everything they need to know, despite the naysayers who panic about her parenting methods because she doesn't force her children to read and write.

She said her son was 10 when he picked up a pen and paper and taught himself to write, saying there "isn't the pressure there" as her children are not in a classroom, admitting there's "no strict schedule."

Adele continued: "We never force kids to do chores. But we do actively encourage them to help out. They help us look after our animals, garden in our allotment, and keep their rooms tidy.

"They're all pretty close to being vegetarian, but they do make their own food choices too.

"They were all breastfed full-term, until a minimum of three years old, which gives them a good healthy foundation. It sets them up for eating healthier and being healthier in the future."

But some people have criticised Adele's parenting style as "lazy", but she said the thought makes her "laugh" as she believes it's the "opposite of lazy", saying they're taking "full responsibility for their development."

Would you use this parenting style? Let us know in the comments.

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