Not once in my entire life have I swiped right on a man holding a fish on Tinder, but hear me out because if he was holding the giant demonic seahorse-looking motherfucker I am about to tell you about, I’d propose on the spot.
Two Aussie dudes in the Northern Territory have shared a photo of the giant oarfish they caught off the coast of Melville Island last week and I’m no marine biologist but that’s a prehistoric seahorse if I’ve ever seen one (I haven’t).
“Our skipper Curtis Peterson from Tiwi Islands Adventures has caught some wild fish for a young fisho, but this one takes the cake,” a post on the Fishing Australia TV Facebook page reads.
The beast, which took both mens’ strength to lift, had a horse-like head and eyes the size of dessert plates that will haunt my dreams for the rest of eternity.
According to the Australian Museum, the oarfish is the longest species of fish, growing to about 8m long — with some specimens being reported to be as long as 17m in length. To make them even weirder, they also swim vertically and are only seen in shallow waters and near the surface when they are dying.
But if its physical appearance isn’t enough to have you terrified, wait until you find out that the oarfish is nicknamed the “doomsday fish” because people believe its presence “foreshadows natural disasters, such as earthquakes or tsunamis.”
The original post has garnered more than 1.4k comments as social media users had a field day trying to work out what the creature actually is.
“Surely it’s this big thing from the never-ending story,” one commenter wrote alongside a photo of the weird flying dog from the film.
“Dinosaur-sized seahorse,” another added.
“Put it back in the water,” a third commenter — and presumably the only one with a brain — said.
“Of course that’s a seahorse which refused to go extinct when the world wiped out dinosaurs,” another commented.
Anyway, this is probably a sign that doomsday is nigh. Or… neigh.
Lead image: Fishing Australia TV
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