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The Guardian - US
The Guardian - US
Technology
Matthew Cantor

Trump loses, Paltrow wins: Twitter marks a historic afternoon for America

Twitter celebrated a uniquely American day of jurisprudence.
Twitter celebrated a uniquely American day of jurisprudence. Composite: Kwangmoozaa/Getty/Reuters

An ex-president indicted for alleged hush money payments to a porn star. A wealthy actor and wellness guru vindicated in a nail-biting fight for justice against a retired optometrist. And all in the space of a few hours.

The reaction on Twitter was clear: God bless America.

Social media was quick to flood with users highlighting the remarkable timing of the verdicts. First came the supposedly untouchable Donald Trump, who was indicted by a New York grand jury over an alleged hush money payment made to the adult film actress Stormy Daniels during the 2016 election. Less than two hours later, in a Utah courtroom, a jury sided with Gwyneth Paltrow, finding her not at fault for a ski accident with Terry Sanderson at a posh mountain resort, and awarding her $1 in compensation.

Trump, whose other accomplishments include trying to overturn a legitimate election and seeking political counsel from a pillow salesman, will soon be fingerprinted and processed for a felony arrest – marking a first for a US president. Paltrow, a Hollywood nepo baby turned orgasm-candle salesperson, captivated onlookers during a weighty civil suit, which offered a rare glimpse into what it’s like to be absurdly rich.

Some Twitter users reacted with pure, unfiltered joy.

Others remarked that a better afternoon of legal drama couldn’t have been scripted for television.

The timing also led to speculation about how the two celebrities might feel about sharing the spotlight.

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