Trevor Noah
Trevor Noah unpacked the Cuomo scandal fallout at CNN, also known as “the channel you watch at the gym while you listen to a podcast”, the Daily Show host said on Wednesday evening.
Jeff Zucker resigns as CNN records another explosive, Cuomo-related scandal pic.twitter.com/5M0YxxM0mK
— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) February 3, 2022
Earlier in the day, the network’s president, Jeff Zucker, announced his surprise resignation after he disclosed a consensual relationship with a colleague. “As part of the investigation into Chris Cuomo’s tenure at CNN, I was asked about a consensual relationship with my closest colleague, someone I have worked with for more than 20 years,” Zucker said in a statement. “I acknowledged the relationship evolved in recent years. I was required to disclose it when it began but I didn’t. I was wrong.”
“Man, this must’ve been a really weird day for CNN,” Noah said. “On the one hand, it’s bad that your boss is resigning under a cloud of scandal. On the other hand, you got the scoop!
“You may not know this, but he’s the one who made CNN what it is today,” Noah added on Zucker, who joined CNN in 2013. “He’s the one who pushed it toward entertainment more, and less news. He’s the one who said, ‘Enough of those international correspondents, let’s just get people fighting on camera!’ Like you remember when CNN would just make us watch Trump’s empty podium for an hour? That was his choice.”
Zucker often kept Donald Trump on air, even before his election in 2016, “because he liked Trump”, Noah explained. “Because he knew Trump was good for ratings, because Jeff Zucker is the one who gave Trump the job for The Apprentice, and The Apprentice is the only reason that Trump went on to become the president – agh!!!”
But the craziest part of the story, Noah concluded, was how far the blast radius from former New York governor Andrew Cuomo’s scandals reached. “So Andrew Cuomo was such a creep that he took down himself, his brother Chris and the president of CNN,” Noah said. “He’s like Ronan Farrow but by accident.”
Seth Meyers
On Late Night, Seth Meyers responded to a statement from the National Archives that Trump tore up many of his official White House documents. “It doesn’t surprise me that Trump treated official presidential records the way the rest of us treat credit card offers from Discover or the way I treat autograph requests from my wife’s niece,” he said.
“Also, let’s all spare a thought for the federal employee who had to tape all of Donald Trump’s presidential records back together,” he added. “Just getting Ziploc after Ziploc of confetti soaked in hand sweat, trying to figure out which words to put together to form sentences. Piecing together Trump’s notes is like fishing a bunch of magnetic poetry out of a garbage disposal.”
Meyers also lamented more news of Trump’s attempts to overturn the 2020 election, such as a report from the House committee investigating January 6 that he directed Rudy Giuliani to ask the Department of Homeland Security about seizing voting machines in key states.
“Man, Trump tried everything: the justice department, homeland security, swing state lawmakers, even Rudy Giuliani,” Meyers said. “Of all people, I can’t believe and yet I can believe that he had Rudy call the Department of Homeland Security. Although, who knows with Rudy – it could’ve been a butt dial.”
Stephen Colbert
On The Late Show, Stephen Colbert looked into the lawsuit against the NFL by former Miami Dolphins coach Brian Flores for racial discrimination. “Now, sure, almost 70% of NFL players are Black, and there’s only one Black head coach in the entire league, but the NFL can’t be racist! They spray-painted a tiny ‘end racism’ next to the Kansas City Chiefs logo!” Colbert joked.
Flores was fired by Miami on 10 January, despite leading the team to its first back-to-back winning seasons since 2003. “Despite his overall record, winning seven of his last eight games this season, Flores was fired, apparently because he did not get along and go along with the owner,” Colbert said. But eight other teams also lost their coaches, and Flores got several interviews for open positions, including with the New York Giants.
Such coaching searches are bound by the NFL’s “Rooney Rule”, which requires NFL teams to interview a diverse range of candidates for head coaching jobs and other leadership positions. “It’s a great idea, gives everybody an opportunity, unless you don’t give an opportunity to anybody, which is what happened in this case,” Colbert explained.
Flores learned via mistaken text from Bill Belichick, the New England Patriots coach, that the head coaching job had gone to someone else – three days before his interview with the team. “So he’s saying they wasted his time just to check a pretend box about how they pretend care about diversity,” Colbert noted, “though I imagine it did take the pressure off the job interview – ‘Where do I see myself in five years? Uh, I don’t know, suing you?’”
Flores is still in the running for two other head coaching jobs, “which is what makes this lawsuit even more impressive”, Colbert concluded. “You see, the NFL, generally speaking – not very forgiving to anyone who stands up to them, or kneels near them. So Flores, who is only 40 years old, has put his future livelihood on the line here, but he’s doing it for a higher purpose.”
