What was the strangest thing you ate on Eat the Invaders?
It’s got to be feral cat, right? It was strange, because I’d eaten everything else before, and probably culturally strange too because I don’t think it’s something Australians consider a food. It was also the yummiest. We had it in the Western Desert and cooked it in a fire, wrapped in foil. It tasted like the most delicious rotisserie chicken I’ve ever had.
What is harder on the body: playing AFL or getting up at 3:30am for breakfast telly?
AFL was actually good for your body, because you’re training and you’re getting fit. Getting up at 3.30am is fucking shit, right? I’ve been out of it for a little bit now and I’ll tell you what, I’ve never been more relaxed. I still wake up early but not at that time. It took about two months for me to finally start feeling normal again. I didn’t realise how much I was walking around like a zombie – you don’t realise how much you’re on autopilot until you come out the other end. That rings true for a lot of people who have worked those shift hours, like nurses and construction workers – I’ve got friends in both those industries. I don’t have that much spare brain power either, so I can’t afford to lose too much.
What’s your most controversial pop culture opinion?
Stop taking it so seriously. We are not changing the world. Everyone needs to get over themselves. We’re trying our hardest. We’re doing our best. Let’s not think about it much more than that. We’re all in entertainment, ladies and gentlemen – let’s entertain.
What’s the best lesson you’ve learned from someone you’ve worked with?
I learned this lesson from a few different people: prep your fucking arse off. When you care so much about doing something, particularly where it’s creative or it’s a performance, so much of it is out of your control – whether that is how it is perceived, or something can go wrong that can’t be helped. So prepare your arse off, do the thing, be proud of it – and then you’ve got to let it go. You can’t define success by how other people view what you do.
I haven’t acted or anything yet, but when I was doing live TV, I always knew that I’ve got it all in here [taps his head]. When something went wrong, I would love it because then you could actually see if you were any good. Anyone can read an Autocue – but when it is a bit stressful, that’s when you get to be in the moment.
What’s been your biggest fashion crime to date?
When I was about 14, SMP skater belts were so cool – you’d buy one that was a bit longer and let it hang down. Mum and I come from a pretty modest background, so I couldn’t afford a pair of skater shorts. I got given a skater belt for Christmas from one of my uncles but I had nothing to wear with it. Mum stitched some belt hoops on to a pair of board shorts, and I wore the skater belt with my boardies.
Fuck me, it was horrific. The massive skater shoes on the skinniest legs. I looked like shit. Back then I thought I looked awesome. Now I don’t really give a shit how I look, because if you like what you’re in, you’re pulling it off. You have just got to own it.
Which book, album or film do you always return to, and why?
An album I always return to is Is This It by the Strokes. What it meant for the scene at that time, coming out of New York – the first song, Is This It, is so apathetic, smug and melancholy. I just love it. I love what it meant.
As for books, I love fantasy and I really love Magician by Raymond E Feist. And film – it’s pretty embarrassing, but I fucking love Top Gun. It’s so cheesy but the good guys win and you can set your watch to Tom Cruise making massive bucks at the box office. He makes undeniably good films. You’re like, ‘I want to hate this. But I can’t!’
What has been your most cringeworthy run in with a celebrity?
Chad Smith, the drummer in the Red Hot Chili Peppers. When I was 16, I played drums and I went to a drum clinic when they came out to Australia in 2006. In my mind, I built it up. I was like, ‘I’m going to say the perfect sentence to Chad Smith when I get my drum skin signed, and he’s going to reply “Tony, would you like to be the backup drummer for the rest of the Australian tour?”’ But I shat the bed. I froze. And he could tell. He went, ‘Enjoy the show, kid!’ and signed my drum skin and I walked off. So cringeworthy, but cute. I reckon I might meet him again at some point, and I can’t wait to tell him.
If you had to fight a famous person, who would it be, how would you fight them, and who would win?
I thought Danny DeVito, but he freaks me out after watching Always Sunny. Maybe David Letterman, or someone old as fuck. Or Chad Smith, for the right to drum in the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
If you had a sandwich named after you, what would be in it?
It’d just be Katz’s Deli in New York. Imagine I’ve bought them out and renamed everything the Tony. There would be the Tony One, the Tony Two. And they’d all be deli sandwiches, with loads of cured meats, provolone and a pickle.
What’s your favourite place to visit?
Outside Australia, Copenhagen. I love it. I go back all the time to visit some Danish mates I met in a pub in London 15 years ago. They were complete strangers but we ended up sharing a long trestle table and we had a great time at dinner. Me and my mate George were sitting there having a durry and this one Dane comes over: ‘Oh, hello. Could my friends sit here with you?’ We said ‘No worries’ – and it was like clowns coming out of a clown car, 20 of them streamed out of the pub to sit with us. But we had a great evening with them and we did the same again the next night. After that, we were best mates. They’ve visited me in Australia. I go visit them every other year. There’s been weddings, there’s been kids born. It’s beautiful.
Eat the Invaders starts on ABC on Tuesday 7 January at 8.30pm
