Dealing with a life-altering stroke is not a challenge most of us would expect to strike us in our 30s or 40s.
Many of us believe that stroke is an illness that only impacts the elderly. Sadly, suffering a stroke under 50 is a reality for more people across Northern Ireland than we might expect.
As a result of this stigma around age, being struck by stroke while younger can very well be an extremely isolating experience.
Read more: Co Antrim stroke survivor backs calls for greater psychological and emotional support
However, three young women who all went through life-changing strokes last year found support, rehabilitation and comradery at their local Northern Ireland Chest Heart and Stroke (NICHS) Post Rehab Exercise Programme (PREP) programme.
It was at the Lurgan PREP group that three amazing young mothers, Jolene and Charlene, both 34 and Eilish, 47, met and shared their stories of how stroke has impacted their lives.
PREP is designed to provide additional support for stroke survivors after their statutory rehab has ended by helping people to rebuild their lives and gain confidence through a combination of education and physio-developed exercises.
After redeveloping the programme to be delivered online via Zoom during the pandemic, the charity has been delighted in the last few months to be able to return to delivering this life-changing programme face-to-face once more in communities across Northern Ireland.
Jolene McAdam from Armagh was an ordinary, busy mum to three kids under seven when life as she knew it was turned upside down by a sudden stroke, aged just 34.
“I was working away, a mum, perfectly healthy, and then boom - a stroke out of the blue,” Jolene recalled.
“I’ll never forget that day. It was May 26th 2021. I was in the car travelling home from Portrush when I began to feel very sick and started vomiting. I thought nothing of it at first, but then all of a sudden, I saw a big white flash, like a camera going off, and I couldn’t see.”
“I thought it would pass in a minute because I would have been prone to visual migraines, but after a few minutes it didn’t go away, and I started to really panic. We pulled up to the nearest doctors and when the doctor came out to the car, I could only see half of her.”
“The doctor said I could be having a type of migraine that mimics a stroke, or it could be a full-blown stroke. She advised me to go to hospital, so we called an ambulance.”
Once the ambulance arrived, it became even more apparent something was very wrong with Jolene.
“When the paramedics came they had to put me on a stretcher because I couldn’t walk. By this stage, I couldn’t move my whole right side. I started finding it difficult to communicate,” she said.
“In the ambulance, the paramedic was asking me questions and it came to a stage where I just shook my head at him. I couldn’t even think or understand. I remember him asking me my name and I told him my maiden name - I knew that wasn’t right, but I couldn’t remember what my name was.”
Jolene was brought to Antrim Hospital and tests began to find out what was wrong.
“The doctors were assessing me, showing me pictures and seeing how much I could see. At this point my whole right side was completely gone. I remember looking down the bed and my arm was just hanging off the bed and I couldn’t move it. I couldn’t communicate - they were talking to me and all I could do was either nod or shake my head,” she added.
“I was thinking, if this is a visual migraine this is horrendous and felt a bit embarrassed that I was in such a bad way. But then I was taken into another ward and I remember this woman coming up to me and saying ‘Jolene, you’ve had a stroke’. I just felt like her face, everything, just zoned out. It was a total shock.”
Jolene adds: “It was difficult being looked after in hospital and losing my independence. I’m a nurse and look after people with disabilities and having the roles reversed was really difficult to deal with.
“It took me a long time to accept what had happened. For me it was the wee things you lost independence in. I remember being asked if I wanted a bib to eat because I was spilling my food, and I thought, ‘No, I don’t want one, I don’t need one!’ I was determined, and I wouldn’t accept that I had lost my independence - I was always pushing saying ‘I can do this myself’. I really wanted my independence back.”
When she was discharged from hospital, Jolene says she returned to a very different life than the one she had left behind that day.
“It affected everything like being able to do things for myself, getting out and about, socialising. At the start, I couldn’t even have a conversation with anyone. When I came home, I could only see half the TV screen and I would have to turn my whole head to watch it. I couldn’t even tolerate the noise of the TV.
“Everything was exhausting. I needed help with everything - cooking, cleaning, looking after the kids. My youngest, Kaiden, was only one and a half and I couldn’t change his nappy, I couldn’t even lift him to carry him or bathe him. Back then, after getting up and getting dressed, I was ready for bed again. Looking back now, I’ve come a long way from that.
“I still have vision loss - I lost my peripheral vision in the right side of my eye. I also have numbness in my mouth and my tongue, and a slight right sided weakness. I was also diagnosed with Holmes Tremor after my stroke, which makes things really difficult.
“It’s also very frustrating because people often don’t understand. To look at me I look fine. You can’t see the difficulties beneath the surface.”
Jolene took part in PREP online as well as the charity’s outdoor Stroke Walking Group before the programme returned to face-to-face delivery.
“With the group, it was the emotional support of having people who had been through it and totally understood which was so important. It was brilliant to meet the other girls and see I wasn’t alone – we’re all young mums and going through the same thing.”
Jolene is determined to keep recovering. “I hate saying life is hard, because that’s so negative. Life has changed, but it’s about looking at the things I can do.”
Charlene Edwards from Lurgan was only 34 years old, a mum to two boys, when she had a stroke on October 23rd 2020 while in her brother’s house and having a drink for his birthday.
“I started feeling really dizzy, so I decided to head home. When I got into my house, I went to the bathroom and was sick. Then, my symptoms got much worse and I realised I was having a stroke,” she recalled.
“I lost power in my leg and hand on my right-hand side, and my ability to talk. I managed to crawl to my bedroom, but I couldn’t get up on the bed. I lay there waiting for someone to find me all night. My dad didn’t come down until the next day, when he called an ambulance.”
Charlene was brought to Craigavon hospital where she was told she had suffered a massive stroke. She was then transferred to Belfast, where she underwent surgery to have a stent fitted in an artery in her neck.
Following her operation, Charlene faced a long road to recovery. “I was in hospital for six weeks and I couldn’t speak a word when I got out. I stayed at my mum’s house for the first week, but I have two boys, Odhran and Daitihi, and I care for Odhran as he uses a wheelchair. I wanted to get back home for them.”
Gradually, with the help of a Speech and Language Therapist and Occupational Therapist, Charlene’s speech and right-sided weakness began to improve.
“They gave me exercises to do which helped, but my speech is still coming back now. It’s called Aphasia. I still jumble my words and find it hard to communicate. I would be helping my son get ready for school and I would say, ‘Put on your jumper’ when he already had his jumper on, and I’d do the same with his shirt, his coat…it would take me much longer to be able to say what I mean.”
Charlene then heard about the PREP group from Jolene who told me to go to the group. I knew her through a mutual friend, and then one day my mum bumped into Jolene’s mum, who said ‘Jolene had a stroke’. My mum said, ‘So did Charlene!’ We got together, and I started going to PREP.”
“The PREP group was brilliant – we were made really welcome. The physio gave us lots of exercises to do which were really helpful. Although the others at the group didn’t have Aphasia like me, it was still helpful to speak to them and we could all share what we were going through.”
Charlene has this advice for anyone going through what she went through:“Keep going – it’s not the end!”
After suffering a devastating stroke last year, mum-of-four Eilish Briggs, 47, from Banbridge says PREP ‘saved her’.
A carer to her teenage son, Michael, it was a normal, hectic day for Eilish when she was struck by her stroke.
“I was getting Michael ready when my face started to feel funny. I looked in the mirror and I could see my mouth was drooping on the left-hand side. My twin sister has Bell's Palsy and sometimes her face would droop because of that. I thought, oh no, is this going to be me now with the same thing?” she said.
“I carried on getting Michael ready and the droop was getting worse. Then when I’d finished, I took a picture of my face and sent it to my sister. She replied and said you might be having a stroke, you need to get seen. I sent the photo to another friend too and she phoned me straight away and said the same and told me to call an ambulance.”
“My boyfriend at the time drove me down to Daisy Hill Hospital, and while we were on the way, my arm and leg began to go numb as well. When we got into the hospital it was all systems go. I have no concept of time while we were in there, but they took me for a CT scan and told me I’d had a stroke while I was still lying in the scanner.”
“They gave me Thrombolysis treatment and I was transferred to the stroke unit, where I stayed for nine days. I was seen by a physio and some of the movement came back in my arm and my leg, although they felt extremely heavy and I didn’t have much grip. My speech had also been affected but it came back too. I thought to myself, ‘Thank goodness I’m okay’ – but I didn’t know yet just how much it would affect me mentally.”
Eilish is now passionate about raising awareness of the invisible impact a stroke can have on a survivor.
“Everybody knows the signs of a stroke and the FAST acronym, but they often aren’t aware of how it affects people, even as they get their mobility back. It can be the other stuff that can be just as hard to deal with. It affects your thinking, your understanding.
“When I’m really tired, that side of my face can droop again, and my leg would get heavy and it’s nearly like it’s happening all over again – it’s very scary. And the fatigue just hits you – it’s an absolutely shocking part of it. People look at you and they think you look fine, so you must be fine - and you’re not. You’re struggling on.”
Eilish was referred to the Lurgan PREP group and says she found it to be a lifeline for her.
“The programme I feel saved me. I felt completely and utterly lost. As much as my family is great, nobody truly understands how it affects you emotionally. You don’t react to things the same way - sometimes you just feel completely and utterly numb, or sometimes you overreact and might break down crying over something small.
“But with the group, being able to talk to each other about what had been going on, how we were feeling, what we were struggling with and then understanding was so helpful. I no longer felt alone,” she added.
“With the other girls, and everyone at the group, even though we all might have been affected in slightly different ways or to different extents, we all understood, we all listened, and we could all bounce things off each other.
“The physio exercises we did at the group were also brilliant – I did them at home too and noticed a big difference in my weak side. We also had information sessions about stroke and our health with a cup of tea or coffee at the end, and those were so beneficial as well.
“There were things I never knew about fatigue that I learned, and it helped make what you were going through make sense. It was relatable.”
To someone going through a stroke like her, Eilish says this: “Go along to a group as soon as you can and get that support - because you need it.”
Jolene, Charlene and Eilish are telling their stories on World Stroke Day to raise awareness of stroke in younger people and of how the charity helped them on their journeys towards recovery.
Ursula Ferguson, Director of Care Services at NICHS added: “Having a stroke is a life-changing reality for thousands of people in our local community every year. As well as the negative impact on physical wellbeing, stroke can reduce independence, confidence and happiness.
“Stroke can also affect relationships, take away jobs and careers and render some families isolated within their own homes- but NICHS is here to help with expert care and support.
“The help available from our Care Services team is extensive and, alongside PREP, includes family support, health education programmes, our Wellness Sessions, Young Stroke groups, a Return to Work programme and emotional support.
“Our team works across Northern Ireland with people of all ages affected by stroke, alongside their families and carers. They are dedicated to supporting people in adjusting to life with a stroke condition, helping them to enjoy life to the full, re-engage with hobbies, and improve their confidence, independence and overall quality of life.”
If you have been affected by stroke and need support visit www.nichs.org.uk/our-support-services/stroke for further information about NI Chest Heart & Stroke’s stroke support services.
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