I don't know if there's a special place in hell for Piers Morgan, arguably the biggest asshole in the whole of the United Kingdom, but there's certainly one for him here in the United States. And, as trumpeted by Rupert Murdoch's ubiquitous News Corp on Thursday, that place is — you guessed it! — Fox News. It might not be "hell," but it's sure close.
"Piers Morgan will join News Corp and FOX News Media in a global deal, launching a new TV show in early 2022," proclaimed a News Corp press release, adding that the infamously obnoxious bootlicker will also be hosting a series of columns for the Murdoch-owned The Sun and New York Post.
Morgan and Murdoch have long worked closely together, with the former launching his career in "journalism" (if you want to call it that) at the latter's various U.K. publications in the late '80s. And while Morgan is no stranger to Fox News as a guest, being granted his own show — albeit, as the press release notes, one to be aired in the U.S. on the network's Fox Nation streaming service — is a considerable step up on the ladder of abusive, bigoted, shamelessly divisive success for which the Fox umbrella is famous.
"I want my global show to be a fearless forum for lively debate and agenda-setting interviews," Morgan said in a statement released by News Corp. "A place that celebrates the right of everyone to have an opinion, and for those opinions to be vigorously examined and challenged."
Here, as a reminder, are some of those fearless opinions and agenda-setting issues upon which Morgan built his career in broadcasting:
- Genderless awards? Bah humbug!
- Muslim ban? No such thing (but it's good, regardless).
- It's totally fine to be friends with Donald Trump.
- Protests against his good friend Donald Trump were "vacuous" and the work of "rabid feminists."
- "Ching chang chong milk from the Chinese state."
Most recently, Morgan infamously quit his post on the U.K.'s popular Good Morning Britain talk show, after it was pointed out to him that mocking and disparaging Meghan Markle's claims of depression and suicidal ideation were, in fact, a real dick thing to do. Indeed, it was that ignominious episode in Morgan's long career of being a real schmuck that freed the broadcaster up for return to the welcoming embrace of the Murdoch media empire.
"Piers is the broadcaster every channel wants but is too afraid to hire," Murdoch said in the announcement of Morgan's hiring. This is, I suppose, technically true, in that every channel wants people to tune in and see how foppishly offensive one man can be, but is also too afraid to hire a bona fide dickhead who could scare off advertisers. But at Fox News, where not even Tucker Carlson's multi-day rants about Nicki Minaj's cousin's friend's swollen balls is beyond the pale for their brand of "journalism," it seems Morgan is truly, finally, among friends.
