Five years ago they were two single mums feeling lonely who had started a small walking group in Cardiff. Now they help thousands of other single parents across Wales with more than £1.4m in grants for projects, research and support.
Amy Holland and Rachel Cule were both struggling to cope as single parents when they met on an online forum for parents in 2017. Rachel, whose marriage broke down when her son Joe, now 11, was two, was suffering on and off with depression. Amy, who moved to Penarth with her two small boys after her relationship broke down, felt such a huge stigma being a single parent to two toddler boys that she felt uncomfortable going out.
“At first it was just a walking group. Then I found being outside in nature really helped my mental health and helped me not feel anxious about going out,” said Amy, now 38 and mum to Finley, nine, and Ruben, seven. You can get more education news and other story updates straight to your inbox by subscribing to our newsletters here.
Read more: 'I got pregnant at 14 and had my daughter when I was 15 but still did my exams and went to uni'
Rachel, 45, a naturally sociable person, felt lonely because her married friends were busy at weekends and holidays and she wanted to mix with other single parents.
Soon the walking group grew by word of mouth and it became clear single parents from all different backgrounds, were looking for mutual support. Rachel and Amy set up Single Parents Wellbeing, securing funding for self-help and advice sessions.
The organisation quickly grew and now has more than 2,000 members, employs eight members of staff, and has 70 active volunteers running events and workshops with childcare. Much of that work went online during Covid when they also lobbied politicians to allow single parents to bubble for support.
As well as securing £1.4m in Big Lottery funding to run wellbeing workshops for single parents, SPW has just won a £900,000 contract from the National Lottery Community Fund to create a mental health manifesto for young people in single-parent homes.
A group of 10 to 24-year-olds from single-parent families in SPW will work with Swansea University, Public health Wales and the Mental Health Foundation. Findings from the four-year project will be shared with health services, politicians and others to create “mental health safe” lives for people in one-parent families.
Rachel said the project was vital after the Covid pandemic which left single parents even more isolated than usual.
She said: “Research shows young people suffered with their mental health through lockdowns and even more so for those from single parent families. On the project they will look at how they might change services and campaign to help improve mental health for people in single-parent families.”
The group’s members are a diverse bunch of people - both fathers and mothers aged from 19 to middle age from right across Wales.
The oldest is a grandmother in her sixties who became a single parent to her grandchild when her daughter died. The group includes professionals such as lawyers, doctors and teachers as well as students, healthcare workers and the unemployed. All are feeling the pinch in the cost of living crisis and many use food banks, said Amy.
“Although 70% of single parents work it is more expensive if you are on your own. There is lots of poverty among single parents and the cost of living has made it harder. Lots more are using foodbanks, including some who work, even those in well-paid jobs.”
Rachel and Amy are proud that they have helped so many people and said their focus is on being compassionate and caring.
Working from a light, airy and friendly base in Riverside they are constantly busy setting up or running events and workshops from first aid to tie dye sessions and a parent and child creative class. Both women said it has helped all the children come together and see people in the same situation and not feel different for not having two parents together.
“I grew up with family outings and weekends and holidays and wanted that for my children. Now we have outings together with SPW,” said Rachel.
Although one in 10 children now grows up in a single-parent household across the UK and there are more than 90,000 single parents in Wales, it can still feel isolating, they said.
“I think there is still a stigma about being a single parent, although I don’t feel it any more thanks to the group,” said Amy.
“And single parents are three times more likely to suffer with their mental health. Our wellbeing workshops run for six weeks, are fully funded and look at things like confidence, childcare, the positive aspects of being a parent and self-care.”
The group also offers legal and financial advice, runs creative workshops and outings as well as wellbeing sessions with childcare provided. A member of staff has been taken on in north Wales and online sessions, started during lockdowns, still run, although the aim is to get together.
Looking back on the last five years Rachel and Amy can’t quite believe how fast and large the group has grown. They said it mushroomed because there was a need for support.
“We have members who are broken hearted because they have become single parents through break ups or bereavement, or were always single parents. We are diverse and inclusive and people don’t have to leave if they have partners,” said Rachel.
Both women said their confidence has grown seeing what they have achieved. Amy, who used to work for a housing association, and Rachel, a former PA, both now work for SPW and said it is a surrogate family as well as work.
“I am proud of what we have done,” said Rachel, “This is not a job, it is about helping each other and we have always been about compassion first.”
“I never in a million years thought it would develop into what it has. I feel proud of Amy as she is the business head.”
Amy and Rachel are also proud of members, especially the young members who gave such a good presentation that they won the £900,000 funding to run the mental health manifesto project.
“We are a real community and that is what is most important,” said Amy.
Read more:
- 17 free things to do with the family in Wales during the summer holidays
- Half of children in single-parent families living in 'relative poverty'
- Father of two speaks candidly about the wonder of raising kids in a same sex relationship and the one issue they've faced
- Wales presses ahead with plans to reshape the school year despite most people being happy as it is
- Cheap last-minute Cardiff Airport flights and holiday deals this summer
