In case you’ve been hiding under a rock this month: the Traitors is back.
The beloved gameshow sees contestants enter a castle in the remote Scottish highlands with the aim of winning a cash prize. The only issue: some of their number are Traitors, and they have murder on their mind.
The whole premise of the show screams camp, and the previous who seasons have done an awfully good job of delivering on that premise. This time around, the iconic moments have been fewer and further between – but we’ve still had some corkers.
Here’s our roundup of the best.
Charlotte putting on a Welsh accent
Of all the inexplicable decisions to make. Contestant Charlotte (from London) entered the castle, having decided to pose as a Welsh person because the accent is “more trustworthy”. It was a big swing to take – and she almost came unstuck right away, when she ran into actual Welshie Elen, who promptly asked where she was from.
In all fairness to Charlotte, the tactic has proved surprisingly successful – she’s still in the show, after all – so who are we to judge?
Lisa secretly being an Anglican vicar… then coming out as one
This has definitely been the season of questionable role-playing choices. In addition to Charlotte, we had priest Lisa deciding, um, not to confess the fact that she’s a priest to her fellow contestants. “Every good murder mystery needs a vicar,” she says chirpily at one point.
A rather extra bit of footage shows her taking off the dog collar – only for her to confess her true identity a few episodes in, after sparking suspicion for saying the words “as God is my witness” at the round table.
"I need to tell you all something," she told the group. "A lot of people have questioned the reason why I said 'As God is my witness.' I am an ordained Anglican priest, I'm ordained and I would never, ever take God's name in vain. The oath I took as a priest means I cannot deceive and I cannot be treacherous, but that lays me wide open now to be murdered. So if I don't see you tomorrow, I love you all!"
Surprisingly, she did actually last a couple more days. Then she was murdered.
Linda weeping at the breakfast table
Another OTT Linda moment: one of many. After coming under suspicion for her, er, rather Traitorly behaviour, the former opera singer decided to go method after she and Minah got together to murder Livi. The next morning, upon ‘finding out’ that Livi had been murdered, Linda broke down into very dramatic tears that had the whole table staring at her.
Linda insisted that Livi had been “like a daughter” to her on the show, but her fate was sealed: she was banished soon after. And thus went an icon.
‘Get over it’
The whole Death Match extravaganza was iconic, tbh. Instead of serving potential victims a poisoned chalice, a la The Traitors S2, Linda and Minah had to ‘murder’ some of the Faithfuls by nominating them to take part in a deadly card game. Fozia ultimately lost, and was served her murder notice by the Traitors – in person.
Cue Fozia telling a smirking Linda that "I knew it was you Linda, you won't get away with this.” As she stalked off, Linda called back, “Get over it!”
Bad footwear
The following day also saw plenty of drama, as the surviving players from the Death Match were slapped in coffins and hidden around the estate for the other contestants to find.
While Anna was found in the woods, Alexander’s coffin was found floating on a boat in the middle of a lake. Excellent stuff – but what was better was watching Frankie run to the water’s edge to help reel it in, whilst wearing "the most inappropriate footwear.” That is, snakeskin slingbacks.
Alexander’s pratfall
One of many moments to star the diplomat-turned-social media sensation Alexander. Earlier in the game, he plays a nice, relaxing game of badminton with Charlotte and Leanne – only to completely miss the target and veer off sideways into a bush.
“I’m sorry, but Alexander can do no wrong. Playing badminton and falling into a bush? An adorable icon,” one person wrote on Twitter. Indeed.
It’s classic slapstick, only bettered by…
Alexander going opera
That’s right, the dreaded doll’s house challenge. This classic Traitors task saw some of the contestants have to enter a haunted cabin the woods, filled with dolls. The aim: to figure out which dolls were singing nursery rhymes backwards, sing the copied refrain down the phone line to the group in the castle, and help them figure out what the nursery rhyme actually was.
Cue Alexander going full method and repeating the nonsense verses back to Francesca like an opera singer.
"Can I just say to anybody who is watching,” Claudia interjected halfway through. “Alexander is single." Music to our ears.
The Traitors is streaming now on BBC
