The slap
It was an eventful Oscars ceremony which included two chaotic fan-voted categories, the return of the red carpet – finally – and a tiny dog in attendance. But one moment overshadowed the rest, casting a shadow on the remainder of the proceedings: a violent outburst from Will Smith after comedian Chris Rock made a joke about the appearance of his wife, Jada Pinkett Smith.
“Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me,” Rock said, visibly shaken.
VIA JAPANESE TELEVISION: The uncensored exchange between Will Smith and Chris Rock pic.twitter.com/j0Z184ZyXa
— Timothy Burke (@bubbaprog) March 28, 2022
The incident was bleeped out in the US, but clips from both Japanese and Australian TV quickly flooded social media.
Congratulations to "via Japanese television" and "via Australian television" for jointly winning this year's Best Picture Oscar
— Michael Roston (@michaelroston) March 28, 2022
— Matt Burke (@matttburke) March 28, 2022
LUPITA IN THE BEHIND WILL SMITH IS KILLING ME #AcademyAwards pic.twitter.com/BtITt6SC4R
— matt murdocks gf ♡ (@omgmattmurdock) March 28, 2022
i know what needs to be taken to the red table …
— hunter harris (@hunteryharris) March 28, 2022
Suddenly Chris rock shows up in the in memoriam
— broti gupta (@BrotiGupta) March 28, 2022
Smith won best actor for his performance in King Richard later in the night, apologising for his actions – though not all were convinced. “I want to be a vessel for love,” he said, minutes after hitting someone on camera.
richard williams taught me to protect my family and that love will make you do crazy things, absolute goated excuse for assaulting someone on live tv, let him get away with it
— josh lewis (@thejoshl) March 28, 2022
Perhaps most egregiously, the slap eclipsed a pint-size pooch, seen gazing forlornly from Jamie Lee Curtis’ arms during a Betty White tribute.
— Vulture (@vulture) March 28, 2022
i'm sorry but jamie lee curtis holding a dog on stage during the in memoriam for betty white right after will smith punched chris rock is a 30 rock sketch
— aleksander chan (@aleksnotalex) March 28, 2022
Fan flop
Among the choices made by the Oscars in a bid to maximise flailing viewership was the inclusion of two fan-voted categories. One of these, the Oscars Cheer Moment, elicited exactly zero cheers for its winner: “The Flash enters the speed force from Zack Snyder’s Justice League”.
What is Cheer Moment? Where is the speed force? Who is voting for this? All great questions that went unanswered.
it says here “the flash enters the speed force" pic.twitter.com/W8MXFPJSz0
— Jacob Oller (@JacobOller) March 28, 2022
Not a day goes by that I don’t think of when “the flash enters the speed force” pic.twitter.com/btZ46y8WUP
— Natalia Winkelman (@nataliawinke) March 28, 2022
i'm hearing that the third hour of the Oscars will be presented entirely inside the speed force
— David Sims (@davidlsims) March 28, 2022
I liked the part in DRIVE MY CAR when Uncle Vanya entered the Speed Force.
— Sean Fennessey (@SeanFennessey) March 28, 2022
if you had told me a year ago that Ryûsuke Hamaguchi's downbeat 3-hour Chekhov movie was going to win an Oscar i probably would've been like "okay, next you'll tell me that The Flash Entering the Speed Force is going to be named the greatest Cheer Moment of all time." #Oscars
— david ehrlich (@davidehrlich) March 28, 2022
Isn’t this … an awards show?
Another strange move by the Academy also attracted an outpouring of anger: its decision to hand out many of its technical awards – including production design, editing, original score and sound – before the show began. Winners were instead announced on the Oscars Twitter account, then – in an even stranger move – celebrated in pre-recorded segments during the ceremony itself.
The Oscars wanted more viewers so they cut a few categories. Then the majority of those categories were won by Dune, a critically and commercially successful blockbuster. Makes sense to me!!
— Brandon Streussnig (@BrndnStrssng) March 27, 2022
lmao that DUNE, a movie that made $400 million worldwide, is absolutely sweeping the awards no one will see bc abc wanted the show to be more "populist"
— Alison Herman (@aherman2006) March 27, 2022
If this year has taught us anything, it’s that the Oscars remains allergic to audiences’ real desires (to see awards) in favour of chasing clout (from Snyder stans).
The Oscars wouldn’t fabricate a fake assault because they could never do anything even remotely that interesting on purpose
— chris person (@Papapishu) March 28, 2022
Chalamet shirt-off
It turns out all we needed to hook into the Oscars was the reinstating of the red carpet – and the coterie of young heartthrobs it brought along with it. The Power of the Dog lead Kodi Smit-McPhee showed off his best powder blue; Dune lead Timothée Chalamet – who starred in the multiple award-winning Dune – showed skin; Euphoria actor Jacob Elordi showed … us to our seats?
serving.. drinks https://t.co/8EgjjGfquW
— ًbella (@vauqhns) March 27, 2022
he's gonna lose so much water. has he even heard of desert power. https://t.co/gvMJ9cCxRm
— casey briggs (@CaseyBriggs) March 27, 2022
Timothee Chalamet is a great actor but I believe his true purpose is bringing Paula Abdul stagewear to men’s fashion. pic.twitter.com/54xKAYek1R
— Louis Virtel (@louisvirtel) March 27, 2022
Red carpet gatecrashers
But Smit-McPhee and Elordi weren’t alone on the red carpet. They were also accompanied – at least in many, many Photoshopped efforts which floated across Twitter – by intertextual friends near and far, including everyone from Dune’s sandworm to Baby Annette (who was snubbed).
dune worm pic.twitter.com/L25Fh0HiqK
— tomyOS 15.3.1 (@upandcummer) March 28, 2022
ROBERT PATTINSON ARRIVED #Oscars pic.twitter.com/AwawUYZNwh
— elle (@myspideyswift) March 27, 2022
ZENDAYA HAS ARRIVED YALL pic.twitter.com/ma9uCO9Zt4
— R♡E 🦢 (@dayasvirgo) March 27, 2022
Gabriel from Malignant has arrived at the #Oscars red carpet pic.twitter.com/FZ5Ya13iTG
— Jeff Zhang 张佶润 (@strangeharbors) March 27, 2022
Baby Annette just arrived at the #Oscars red carpet! pic.twitter.com/ONwDrpMMw0
— Rafa Sales Ross (@rafiews) March 27, 2022
Bond gets gnarly
In classic producer hijinks, a segment celebrating the 60th anniversary of James Bond was presented by a dynamic trio of Tony Hawk, Kelly Slater and Shaun White. In case you are wondering what this group of professional skateboarders and surfers have to do with the famously suave spy, the answer is: nothing.
We finally know why Tony Hawk, Kelly Slater, and Shaun White presented at the Oscars… because James Bond “takes it to the extreme”?
— Who? Weekly - #1 PODCAST IN THE COUNTRY (@whoweekly) March 28, 2022
the first thing i think of when i hear 'james bond' is tony hawk, kelly slater and shaun white #oscars
— Marlow Stern (@MarlowNYC) March 28, 2022
James Bond truly lived every day as if it were the X Games. and for that we salute him. #Oscars
— david ehrlich (@davidehrlich) March 28, 2022
i, for one, still remembered the existence of james bond and did not need reminding but ty oscars, good to know this little-known cultural figure will not be lost to time
— Kathryn VanArendonk (@kvanaren) March 28, 2022
Dream blunt rotation pic.twitter.com/o4RyGFEXgb
— Silver Screen Fiends Podcast (@ssfiendspodcast) March 28, 2022
Two thumbs up
And finally, this gift of a reaction image: Nicole Kidman cosplaying a parent at their kid’s school recital. Keep going Oscars, you’re doing great sweetie!
WHY ISN'T THIS ON TV pic.twitter.com/Pc963qDu09
— Matt Jacobs (@tarantallegra) March 27, 2022
