SPINNING AND WEAVING
After hours of dodging questions, circumnavigating answers, and diverting blame elsewhere as Crikey reports, former prime minister Scott Morrison conceded to the robodebt royal commission yesterday that the scheme was (not initially, but eventually) illegal. The caveat? He had great trust and “confidence” in his officials so the matter of legality (and illegality) rested in their capable hands, writes the AFR. Morrison maintained it was their “obligation and duty” to warn him of any issues and that he frankly found it “distressing” that they never did, adds Guardian Australia.
The royal commission was established to investigate the “distress” caused to hundreds of thousands of victims targeted by the unlawful Centrelink debt recovery scheme dreamed up in 2015 when Morrison was social services minister. It ran until late 2019, and relied on average Tax Office income data to falsely claim recipients received too much money. The onus was on them to prove otherwise. Hearings will continue in Brisbane today.
HIGH AND PRETTY MIGHTY
The numbers are in for the Victorian Legislative Council and the Greens (alongside Legalise Cannabis) are set to hold the balance of power, Guardian Australia reports. The 40-member chamber will be 15 Labor (three down), 14 Liberals (three up), four Greens (a 400% improvement), two Legalise Cannabis (a party first), and a series of standalone representatives from minor parties, adds the ABC. Despite Labor’s solid majority in the lower house — one-upping itself on last election with 56 (out of 88) seats — negotiations must be had in the upper house to pass legislation. Six of 11 crossbenchers will need convincing. The Greens-Legalise Cannabis combo has been deemed the path of least resistance for Premier Daniel Andrews, despite its demands to decriminalise marijuana (not on the premier’s current to-do list).
On the other side of the country, former WA MP Brian Ellis has pleaded guilty for lying under oath and literally attempting to sink evidence during a 2019 Corruption and Crime Commission (CCC) investigation into his misuse of taxpayer dollars for the purposes of baths and strip clubs, The Australian ($) reports. At the time Ellis said he tossed his phone in the bin, but that testimony was false. The phone was alive and well… until he threw it in the ocean a week later, replaced it with a replica, and handed that in as evidence. Ellis will learn next week whether his poor choice in method of disposal will land him in jail. He’s facing a maximum penalty of three years behind bars and $60,000 in fines for wilfully obstructing the investigation and as many as five years’ imprisonment and a $100,000 fine for giving false evidence.
PULLING THE PLUG
Australia’s eSafety Commission will release a report today detailing tech giants’ behind-the-scenes management (or lack thereof) of online child sexual abuse, the SMH ($) reports. Companies including Apple, Microsoft and Meta were found to not only turn a blind eye but “effectively created a paedophile paradise”. Apple leaned into user privacy as reason for lax monitoring (only 160 instances of abuse were reported last year), Microsoft only picks up content that is shared not stored, and while WhatsApp bans 300,000 accounts a month for child exploitation violations, it does not talk to sister platforms Facebook or Instagram despite account cross-over. What was most “gobsmacking” to eSafety commissioner Julie Inman Grant was that none of the companies justified their failure to act.
Speaking of disgraced tech, Elon Musk is no longer head honcho of the global rich list, says Guardian Australia. He (reluctantly) hands over the top spot to France’s Bernard Arnault, chief executive of luxury group LVMH, after Tesla shares continued to plummet. The electric car company has lost more than half its market value since Musk first made a bid for Twitter in April. Back home, the AFR ($) reports that Binance Australia — the Australian arm of the world’s largest crypto exchange — has been hit with a hefty $2 million fine for inundating inboxes with spam. In six months, Binance served Australians 5.7 million opt-out or no-opt-out emails (some non-consensual) in a bid to counteract mass withdrawal of customer funds. Small fry compared with founder of the failed cryptocurrency exchange FTX Sam Bankman-Fried who faces eight criminal charges following an $11 billion shortfall, the ABC reports. He’s holed up in the Bahamas, denied bail, and awaiting extradition to the US.
ON A LIGHTER NOTE
In breaking news: the clitoris has finally been located… on snakes, at least. The reptiles were formally admitted into the “animal kingdom’s clitoris club” after researchers from the US and Australia found the genitalia of female snakes to be “as diverse” as that of their male counterparts, the ABC reports. Ranging from “extremely tiny” to “large” to “almost muscular” and “thin and stretched out” (please see accompanying visuals), researchers believe the diversity of designs show the snakes could well be seeking pleasure, not simply serving as succession machines.
Until recently, snake mating has been understood as a coercive practice. Why? Because male snakes have a “formidable assortment of penises” often adorned with one-directional barbs and spines that slide in… and snag out. These come in pairs and go by “hemipenes”, a complement to the females “hemiclitores”. That’s right, folks, female snakes have not one but two clitorises. Seen through the male gaze, these were long mistaken for underdeveloped penises. Surprise me. Clarity over the female anatomy now gives researchers a better understanding of the ins and outs of “snake sexy time”. Sexual servitude to be replaced with “stimulation” and maybe even a spot of “seduction”. There remains “much to learn” about the ins and outs of animal (and human) anatomy, but the discovery of the snake clitoris certainly has researchers excited.
Hoping you too discover something new today, folks.
SAY WHAT?
Mr Morrison can I get you to stick to answering the question a bit more? I do understand that you come from a background where rhetoric is important, but it is necessary to listen to the question and just answer it without extra detail, unnecessary detail, if you can.
Catherine Holmes
The robodebt royal commissioner told the former prime minister, social services minister et al, to keep his political waffle and “wandering” to a minimum while giving evidence during the commission hearing. Holmes implored Morrison to listen and give relevance a go, but Morrison would not, could not. One question took him 10 minutes to muster a simple “no”. Never fear, he said, I am available tomorrow and the day after that. Would someone please pass on to the PM past that Parliament sits today and in his capacity as a federal member (side hustle or no), he is expected to attend.
CRIKEY RECAP
Experts renew warnings about threat of conspiracy and sovereign citizen movements after Queensland shooting
“Little has been made public by police about the shooters’ motivations for the attack. Experts who spoke to Crikey stressed that understanding the reasons behind an act of violence like this can be a difficult process and cautioned against speculation until more information comes to light.
“However, they mentioned that aspects of what is known about the Wieambilla shooters highlight concerns about extremism and online radicalisation in the community and the potential for violence.”
Where are they now? Catching up with the MPs who lost their seats in 2022
“The two-party system collapsing in May like a bridge made of sodden Weet-Bix meant a remarkable number of high-profile MPs on both sides of the aisle lost their jobs. Today Crikey checks in on the election’s casualties.
The former treasurer [Josh Frydenberg], unsurprisingly, didn’t have to wait long — it feels like we waited longer for his deeply reluctant concession call to Monique Ryan in Kooyong than to see him find his next job. He joined investment bank Goldman Sachs in July as a senior regional adviser for the Asia Pacific.”
Morrison’s foreign investment power plan raises more questions about secret ministries
“Scott Morrison secretly swore himself in as treasurer in order to get power over foreign investment proposals, new documents have revealed.
“A trove of emails and other papers released by the Department of Prime Minister and Cabinet under a freedom of information law reveals a senior bureaucrat told a select group of colleagues in April 2021 ‘the Treasury swearing relates to FIRB’. (FIRB is short for the Foreign Investment Review Board, a non-statutory body that advises the treasurer on foreign investments.)”
READ ALL ABOUT IT
NASA to conduct first global water survey from space (Reuters)
Number of journalists imprisoned worldwide hits new record: RSF (Al Jazeera)
How will China fare with COVID? ‘Meaningless’ data clouds the picture. (The New York Times)
Migrant worker dies at World Cup after falling from top of Lusail Stadium (The Guardian)
Iran likely to be ousted from UN women’s commission (Reuters)
Son sues Meta over father’s killing in Ethiopia (BBC)
Netherlands set to formally apologise for 250 years of slavery (Al Jazeera)
To live and die in Tijuana, Mexico’s new fentanyl capital (The Washington Post)
Republican who wanted Trump to declare ‘Marshall’ law only regrets the misspelling (The Guardian)
THE COMMENTARIAT
An Indigenous Voice to Parliament will not give ‘special rights’ or create a veto— Anne Twomey (The Conversation): “The expert group unanimously agreed this form of an amendment would not result in the Voice having a veto power over the actions of Parliament or the executive government. The power and function of the Voice is to make representations. It cannot dictate, demand or veto.
“What use the Parliament or the executive government makes of those representations is a matter for it, as is appropriate in a system of representative and responsible government.”
Warne, Barty, Buddy and ScoMo: the best and worst of the sporting year that was — Peter FitzSimons (SMH): “Biggest yawn-fest: the cricket. What happened this year? It’s so hard to keep track I’ve had to put another man on, and even then my eyes glaze over. Yes, I know we won the Ashes handsomely, but much of it since then just seems to be a blur of formats against sides that are no sooner flown in than they have gone again …
“Biggest ‘Oops, did I say that, pardon my French’ moment: that would be Phil Mickelson talking about the LIV Golf mob, backed by the Saudi regime who among other atrocities had organised the murder of Washington Post journalist Jamal Khashoggi in 2018. ‘They’re scary motherf—–s to get involved with,’ Mickelson was quoted as saying in an unauthorised biography. ‘We know they killed Khashoggi and have a horrible record on human rights. They execute people over there for being gay. Knowing all of this, why would I even consider it? Because this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to reshape how the PGA tour operates … The Saudi money has finally given us leverage.’ ”
WHAT’S ON TODAY
Eora Nation Country (also known as Sydney)
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On the 8th anniversary of the Lindt Cafe Siege, an anonymous member of the NSW Police Tactical Operations Unit who goes by ‘Officer A’ will launch their book Tiger! Tiger! Tiger! at Wentworth Gallery. They will be joined by former PM Tony Abbott, former NSW Premier Mike Baird, siege survivor Louisa Hope and former CEO of Beyond Blue and Lifeline, Dawn O’Neil.
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