This is For The Win’s daily newsletter, The Morning Win. Did a friend recommend or forward this to you? If so, subscribe here. Have feedback? Leave your questions, comments and concerns through this brief reader survey! Now, here’s Mike Sykes.
The Jets are not a real NFL team.
I don’t mean that in the sense that the Jets are just so incompetent that they don’t compare to a legitimate NFL team. Obviously, that’s true. But that’s not what I’m saying here, Winners.
What I’m saying is there’s no way the New York Jets are an actual football team.
I refuse to believe this anymore. I won’t continue to fall for this trick that everyone is playing on us and you shouldn’t either. There’s got to be something else going on in the background that keeps those doors open every day. How else do you reasonably explain anything that happens around this team?
The “team” — if we’re still calling it that — operates more like an ABC workplace comedy sitcom than an actual football team. A rotating cast of characters comes in each day with new hijinks.
Usually, it’s Aaron Rodgers stepping on a rake and hitting himself in the face with the handle. Not today, though! Today, it’s Woody Johnson, the 77-year-old owner who is only open to the whims of his teenage boys, Brick and Jack, when running his team.
That’s the reported explanation for why Johnson nixed a trade for Jerry Jeudy. His teenage sons didn’t like his Madden rating, according to reporting from The Athletic.
HIS MADDEN RATING, y’all. Woody Johnson doesn’t even know what Madden is, man.
I need someone to explain to me — like I’m 5 years old — how the Jets aren’t simply a front for something. Has anybody peeked inside at the Jets’ front office lately? Are we sure it exists? What are they selling back there? My guess is jailbroken Firesticks with NFL League Pass included. That’s how unserious this operation is.
The good news for Jets fans — if you *do* actually exist out there — is that Johnson will probably be out of your hair soon if he goes to work for the first-ever president-elect to be a convicted felon.
The bad news is that Aaron Rodgers is inevitable. Sorry.
Jeremiah Fears has no fear
Sorry. I’ve been itching to type that headline for the last 12 hours. You’ve probably already seen 16 different variations of it online, but whatever. It’s perfect. And it’s true.
Oklahoma’s Jeremiah Fears’ game-winning shot against Michigan on Wednesday night is the stuff of legend.
The Sooners need 3-points to tie the game and send it to overtime. Fears did them exactly one point better. He hit the three and got the foul.
Oklahoma is undefeated at 11-0 and looks like one of the best teams in the country. For Fears to be this team’s leader as a freshman is extremely impressive, considering that he reclassified to play for Oklahoma this year.
He should be planning prom-posals and getting ready to graduate. Instead, he’s hitting big buckets and getting ready to cash in at the NBA draft next summer.
The value of an NBA team
Mat Ishbia and the Phoenix Suns decided to sell concessions for $2 in the Phoenix Suns arena, which is absolutely reasonable and exactly how it should be.
It was always ridiculous that people were paying more than that for bags of chips that were half filled with air and bottles of water that somehow still leave you thirsty.
Considering how much these teams are worth, those prices are even more absurd. Sportico released its annual NBA valuation data and the numbers are staggering.
A few numbers for you:
- NBA teams are collectively valued at $138 billion.
- The average NBA team is worth around $4.6 billion.
- The Warriors were the highest team valued at $9.14 billion. The Grizzlies were the lowest at $3.06 billion.
You catch my drift here. The cheapest team in the league is worth multiple billions of dollars. You and I could pool together our resources with a few thousand other people like us and we probably still couldn’t buy a sliver of this team.
I’ll never buy another bag of chips from an arena again.
Quick hits: Doug Gottlieb the doofus … Diego Pavia is back … and more
— Doug Gottlieb really put his foot in his mouth with this one. Meg Hall has more on his hilarious blunder.
— Diego Pavia is returning to Vandy. Watch out, Hugh Freeze. Christian D’Andrea has more here.
— Here are our straight-up picks for Week 16 in the NFL. There are some good games on the slate this weekend.
— I love a fake punt-pass but this one takes the cake. Cory Woodroof has more.
— Josh Allen is head over heels, y’all. I love this. Robert Zeglinski has more.
— Mike Penix Jr. was doing the funniest thing when he got the news that he was the Falcons’ starting QB.
That’s a wrap, folks. Thanks so much for reading. Have a happy Thursday. Peace.
-Sykes ✌️
