For many of the survivors who live inside a domestic violence refuge, a normal Christmas will be something they've only dreamed of.
At one refuge in Bolton, run by the organisation Fortalice - most of the families living there will have painful memories of the festive season. Others will be miles away from friends and family.
In the past, women say they've had to lie to their children about Father Christmas being ill. Having no control of your own finances makes it impossible to plan.
READ MORE: The unspoken signs of domestic abuse every woman needs to know about
That's why the charity's Chief Executive, Gill Smallwood, does everything she can to ensure the refuge, which consists of 22 self-contained apartments, boasts the festive cheer so many of us take for granted.
Families forced to stay in the refuge for their own safety are provided with all the ingredients to cook their own Christmas dinner. And kids are gifted brand new toys to play with - something many of them will never have received before.
"Some of the people who come in here are separated from their family and friends for their safety so people often feel isolated initially," Gill said, speaking to the M.E.N.
"A lot of the families that come in don't know what a special Christmas is. Someone once said to me in years gone by they had to pretend to their children Santa was ill because they were in an abusive relationship."
![](https://i2-prod.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/incoming/article25763221.ece/ALTERNATES/s810/0_gill-smallwood-cropped.jpg)
Families who have since left the refuge say the Christmas they spent there was among the best they'd ever had, due to the safety, kindness and freedom it offers.
"They are not living in fear anymore," Gill said. "People are often waiting on a razor edge for something to happen and they are free from that fear here.
"We just try to create that safe and happy environment for them. They feel safe and secure and well looked after here. Every flat is independent and some people want to spend time with just their children.
"Others will want to spend time together. Previously we did a cinema night which got all the women and children together on Christmas Eve which was great.
"Someone donated some vouchers to us one Christmas as most of the women and children will have never had control of their own finances. I will always remember the look on one boy’s face of sheer astonishment t that someone had given him something. He asked ‘why are people being kind to me?’"
The organisation, which receives incredible support from the local Bolton community, was set up in 1977. Their services support women, men, families and children and young people in the surrounding areas who have been affected by domestic abuse.
"What we tend to see is that the build up to Christmas is good for relationships and then once it's over there's an impact," Gill said.
"Debts can be a trigger and arguments can start. We will definitely receive some calls after Christmas. Families all want the perfect Christmas so they will often put up with a relationship until after it's over."
Gill says they have received plenty of toy donations this year, but are calling for financial help too, as the organisation has been hit badly by soaring energy bills and costs.
"I want to say a real special thank you to everyone who has donated this year," she said. "What we really need now are financial donations. I am concerned about the impact of bills and our ability to continue to keep women safe."
For more information about Fortalice, and the services they provide, click here.
Domestic Abuse helplines
- National Domestic Abuse Helpline – 0808 2000 247 – www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/ (run by Refuge)
- The Men’s Advice Line, for male domestic abuse survivors – 0808 801 0327 (run by Respect)
- The Mix, free information and support for under 25s in the UK – 0808 808 4994
- National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline – 0800 999 5428 (run by Galop)
- Samaritans (24/7 service) – 116 123
- Rights of Women advice lines, there are a range of services available.
READ NEXT: