A ‘death cafe’ may not seem like an ideal place to spend an evening, but one Co Tyrone group are encouraging people to do exactly that to take the stigma away from end of life.
Yorkshire native Rose Mai Celeste had a fascination with death from an early age and ended up working as a carer for many people who died alone without family or friends.
Now she has started a group for people from all walks of life to get together to discuss death without stigma. The ‘death cafe’ concept was first created by John Underwood in London in 2011 and now there are many which take place across the UK and the world. Rose thought it would be a good idea to bring one to Dungannon .
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“My background is in care work and particularly in end of life care, that’s why I have such an interest in it,” Rose told MyTyrone.
“I had been to a death cafe a couple of years ago and I really got a lot from it. So I decided to set one up here in Dungannon.
“It’s the same structure mostly, there’s no agenda or any topic to discuss specifically. I’m not a teacher, I’m only really there as a host.
“We literally just open the space to share anything anybody wants about death. That can go in so many different directions.
“Sometimes it’s just people there to listen to other people’s stories. Sometimes it’s more of a discussion shared between everybody.
“People are sometimes confused about what a death cafe actually is or they think it’s a cult or something. But it’s just a safe space to talk about all things to do with end of life.”
Rose added her first experience of death came when a family member passed, and said she always wanted to help people understand and deal with death better.
She was also keen to stress that the group is not the same as a grief counselling session.
“I’ve always had a fascination and interest in death. I volunteered at a funeral home until I was about 16 and I did a health and social care qualification while caring for my great grandmother.
“She was the first person that I knew that had died and from there I just wanted to do something to do with end of life.
“I worked as a live in carer and often it was end of life experiences, so I was with quite a few people as they died, often without family.
“I feel like it’s a really sacred and important time in our lives that we don’t really always want to talk about. A lot of the people I cared for were so scared because they had never really had those conversations.”
“Now I feel like it’s so important to have those conversations before we get to that point. A lot of people that have come to the group have said they found it so uplifting.
“It’s quite liberating just to be able to freely talk in the space that we have and listen to others.”
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