![Clockwise from top left … Bauhaus teapot, Shrigley sculpture, Dark Side of the Spoon, Doggy Parton pet attire, water tower plant pot, pop playing cards.](https://media.guim.co.uk/e04326e50b90df8c4bec6848dc06406557d135b9/0_0_2560_1536/1000.jpg)
007 socks
From jumping headfirst off a dam to avoiding Colonel Rosa Klebb’s poison-tipped dagger shoes, James Bond’s greatest exploits can now be worn on your feet. There’s even a vodka martini one, very shaken of course. thelondonsockexchange.net, £12
ENO’s Choose Opera T-shirt
As worn by the cast for the curtain call of Yeomen of the Guard the day after the ACE’s devastating cuts were announced. A great way to show your support for ENO – and an artform that’s just lost 30% of its public funding across the country. londoncoliseum.org, £20
Fear Eats the Soul tea tray
Fancy paying homage to Fassbinder’s cinematic masterpiece while serving up tea and biscuits? You clearly need this handy home improvement by artist Rirkrit Tiravanija. newmuseumstore.org, $140
Faith Ringgold Sunflower jigsaw
Numbering 1,000 pieces, this puzzle should see you through Christmas. And given that the Ringgold painting it’s based on depicts nine legendary Black women shoving Van Gogh to the sidelines as they unroll a sunflower quilt, there’s plenty to trigger any bigoted uncle on Christmas Day. store.moma.org, £20
Richard Smith: Artworks
The British artist, credited with putting on the first pop art show in New York, is celebrated in this 272-page hardback spilling over with colour and seeking to finally give him his due. Francis Bacon Publishing with Thames and Hudson, £60
Shining hotel socks
Nothing says Happy Christmas like fancy socks. But in a terrifying twist, these have the same pattern as the carpet in the Overlook Hotel, scene of many a terrifying scene in Stanley Kubrick’s iconic horror The Shining. shop.bfi.org.uk, £12.99
Play It As It Lays beach towel
Mark the first anniversary of Joan Didion’s death by buying this sun-worshipper’s essential. Emblazoned with the cover of the writer’s ruthless dissection of 60s America, it’s created by artist and singer Seth Bogart. wackywacko.com, $49.99
![Clockwise from top left: 007 socks, Tinky Winky’s pride tote bag, every Strictly result ever tea towel, Faith Ringgold Sunflower jigsaw, Murder She Wrote T-shirt, lindy hop coasters, AC/DC Monopoly, Welsh tea party Christmas cards.](https://media.guim.co.uk/e744671bf26343996e5069e88723b45642c330f6/0_0_2560_1536/1000.jpg)
Why Is Art Full of Naked People?
This and 21 other vital questions are answered in Susie Hodge’s admirably plain-speaking book destined to excite the young art-lover in your life. Thames and Hudson, £12.95
Modern Women: 21st Century Dance Colouring Book
Created during the shuttered days of Covid, this is a fun way for enthusiasts of all ages to illustrate and explore innovative women in dance today. Using photographs from the last 20 years, New York’s biggest names are lifted from the stage or studio and given new “worlds” to perform in. etsy.com, £21
Martha Graham quote T-shirt
She danced and taught for over 70 years and now the US star’s wisdom can be worn on a T-shirt. “The body says what words cannot,” it reads – a message that will only get truer the sweatier it becomes. etsy.com, £20
Ballet shoe keyring
A long overdue entry into the world of merch for the iconic pointe footwear. This leather keyring is stamped by your favourite maker, from Crown to Clef, from Fish to Triangle. store.freedoflondon.com, £4
Every Strictly result ever tea towel
From actor and tango ninja Kara Tointon to fast bowler Darren Gough’s fiendish foxtrot, this dish-drying sensation celebrates all the mirror-ball victors and more. etsy.com, £9.95
Lindy hop coasters
Say goodbye to drink stain misery with these energetic additions to any parlour. The set of six swinging couples have great titles too: Airplane Charleston, Boy You Turn Me, Collegiate Shag, Swingout, That Friday Feeling and Toe-Tappin’. etsy.com, £27
Tinky Winky’s pride tote bag
Tinky Winky was attacked by US televangelists for normalising gay lifestyles when he/she carried a handbag on Teletubbies. So teach your toddler the importance of tolerance and diversity with this bag depicting the transgressive teletubby carrying a pride flag. Eh-oh! redbubble.com, $28.54
Hannah Starkey: Inspire Sisterhood print
“This was a place full of women,” said Starkey of this picture of solidarity taken at the 2017 Women’s March in London. “They all wanted to be photographed. They wanted to be seen. They’d made these beautiful signs. They were angry.” shop.hepworthwakefield.org, edition of 50, £450
Stranger Things VHS tape light
Is a secretive lab operating at night near your house? Are you worried about waking in the Upside Down? Well, banish your bedtime fears with this light from the 80s throwback horror series. amazon.co.uk, £19.99
Murder She Wrote T-shirt
Angela Lansbury, the grande dame of the easygoing whodunnit, is immortalised in this distressed vintage garment. As the English teacher turned supersleuth might say: “I may be wrong about this one but, frankly, I doubt it.” truffleshuffle.co.uk, £19.99
David Shrigley foot sculpture
This porcelain left foot can be displayed as an eye-catching sculpture in your home. Given its shallow dip at the ankle, though, the foot can also be used to hold paperclips, rock salt, watercress or even a boiled egg. shrigshop.com, €40
![Clockwise from top left: Protest stencil toolkit, Play It As It Lays beach towel, Hannah Starkey: Inspire Sisterhood print, Christmas playlist advent calendar, Fear Eats The Soul tea tray, ENO Choose Opera T-shirt, Stranger Things VHS tape light, Why Is Art Full of Naked People.](https://media.guim.co.uk/2761eea363d7e9aef889b40978437bf91e2196dd/0_0_2560_1536/1000.jpg)
Doggy Parton sequined dress, guitar, and wig for pets
This homage to Dolly Parton is endorsed by the country music colossus herself, who brandishes the garment on the website. The ensemble includes a pink ruffled tulle dress paired with a matching faux pink guitar and finished off with a curly blonde wig. doggyparton.com, $29.99
The Last Days of the Opera
A coffee-table-busting opera anthology, spilling over with pictures of ravishing sets and stagings. Explores the art form’s past, present and future in an unstable world, there are essays from the likes of mezzo-soprano Cecilia Bartoli, as well as musician Laurie Anderson, exiled Iranian artist Shirin Neshat and theatre director Katie Mitchell. skira.net, published 8 December, €45
Badly drawn author T-shirts
From an eye-patched James Joyce to a stoic Toni Morrison, this is your chance to adorn your torso with a scratchy yet stylish drawing of your favourite writer. Thomas Pynchon, naturally, is represented by a blank space. etsy.com, £25
Dark Side of the Spoon rock cookbook
Want to know how to make Smashing Pumpkin Pie? Keen to find out what goes into Rolling Scones? Fancy rustling up a Mötley Stüe? Then put this on your Santa wish-list. darksideofthespooncookbook.co.uk, £10
Christmas playlist advent calendar
Each door on this Spotify countdown calendar reveals a new yuletide track, all culminating in a festive playlist for the big day. Just pull open a door, hold up your phone and it’ll be beginning to look a lot like Christmas in no time at all. notonthehighstreet.com, £12.50
Arctic Monkeys The Car keyring
Inspired by the Sheffield band’s heavily orchestrated recent album, this leather accessory will turn any set of car keys into a cultural talking point bound to liven up any dull drive. store.arcticmonkeys.com, £6
AC/DC Monopoly
I’m on a highway to Pentonville! This headbanging take on the family board game casts aside the dog, the iron and the boat and ushers in Angus’s hat, stacks of cash and the bell – all of which have to dodge recording studio fees, bankruptcy and jail. amazon.co.uk, £29.99
Artists as mugs
The unmistakable eyebrows of Frida Kahlo are just one of the delights in this range designed by Jorge Mora. Salvador Dalí’s flyaway moustache is another, along with the plaster over Van Gogh’s ear. trouva.com, £27.99
Musician playing cards
Goodbye hearts, clubs, diamonds and spades! These 52 playing cards, divided into four musical genres, feature all the big names, from Madonna to Johnny Cash to Amy Winehouse. The jokers are Björk and David Bowie. trouva.com, £9.99
PO-80 Record Factory
Cut your own piece of red-hot vinyl with this compact and portable disc maker. Simply plug in any audio device and get into the groove – literally! teenage.engineering, £149
Protest stencil toolkit
What do we want? Christmas presents! When do we want them? Christmas Day! This stencil library not only lets you make everything from eye-catching banners to bedroom-door signs, it also includes classic symbols from great protest movements. laurenceking.com, £19.99
Cool Danish museum posters
The Louisiana Museum outside Copenhagen is a kind of Danish MoMA and a browse through its range of art posters is like spending an afternoon at a great gallery. At the moment they’re offering ones connected to its exhibition about Weimar Germany. butik.louisiana.dk/collections/all, prices vary
![Clockwise from top left: Badly drawn author James Joyce T-shirt, miniature Daily Mail, PO-80 Record Factory, Kit Kat club champagne glasses, Arctic Monkeys The Car keyring, Midcentury modernist birdhouse, Grace Jones egg cup, Yinka Ilori umbrella.](https://media.guim.co.uk/c8bda3e4b8a57df289f24d88eab303cb5ad05f62/0_0_2560_1536/1000.jpg)
Story Box
Create your own fairy tales using puzzle pieces that can we switched around to take plots in all sorts of directions. Can you find the missing elf before he’s eaten by the big bad wolf? How will you stop the giant pink rabbit from terrorising the castle? vam.ac.uk, £12.99
Welsh tea party Christmas cards
Treat your most miserable neighbour to a Christmas card bearing a truly funereal scene from the National Museum Cardiff’s photography collection, called Welsh Tea Party in the 1860s. shop.museum.wales, £5 for five-pack
Miniature Daily Mail
This 32-pager comes with a Diana: The Enemy Within magazine and features headlines such as “The real racists are the people who call me racist when I’m being racist” and “Rich people failing to integrate into British society”. spellingmistakescostlives.com, £8
Grace Jones egg cup
Pull up to the breakfast baby, with this kitchen essential inspired by the imperious Afrofuturist icon. katchskinnerceramics.com, £25
Concrete water tower plant pots
Bring a taste of India to your patio with these distinctive pots, part of a collection of planters and vases inspired by the brutalist water towers and flyover infrastructure pillars found in the country. tiipoi.com, £69
Midcentury modernist birdhouse
Show our fine feathered friends you care for them with this dynamic addition to any garden, proving that good design needn’t stop at the back door. etsy.com, £218
Curtain Up: Behind the Scenes at the Royal Opera House
Offering an insight into some of the venue’s most lavish ballets and operas, this child-friendly tour is led by Figaro, the opera house’s resident cat. shop.roh.org.uk, £12.99
Kit Kat club champagne glasses
Give someone special the clink of decadence with these coupe glasses inspired by Cabaret, the book/play/movie/musical set in Berlin’s Kit Kat club. kitkat.shopping, £50
Yinka Ilori homeware
Liven up the drab winter months with the colour tsunami that is the British-Nigerian designer’s trademark. Throws, stools, cushions, rugs, bowls, mugs and an umbrella that will make you pray for rain! shop.yinkailori.com, various prices
Bauhaus teapot
You can’t beat a good brew. But tea has never been very geometrical – until now, thanks to this pot inspired by the German rectangle enthusiasts. Just look at that yellow spout! designk.co.uk, £68
• Contributors: Imogen Tilden, Jonathan Jones, Alex Needham, Lucy Knight, Lyndsey Winship, Stuart Jeffries, Hannah Clugston Wilson, Kate Abbott, Dave Simpson, Mee-Lai Stone, Paul Simon, Craille Maguire Gillies, Tim Jonze, Oliver Wainwright, Chris Wiegand.