While some friends become the people you can’t imagine your life without over time, others might make it increasingly more difficult; and that’s when ending the friendship is likely to be the best decision.
Some friendships are simply not meant to last, and there can be hundreds of reasons why. Members of the ‘Ask Men’ community discussed such reasons after the user ‘Background-Grape8026’ asked them what made them want to end a friendship with a guy friend of theirs. The netizens' answers covered all sorts of scenarios, ranging from heartbreaking to frustrating, showing that not all friends are there for the long run. Scroll down to find them on the list below.
#1
When I found out how badly he treated his gf, he had a very different set of values towards women than I did. Ended the friendship and supported her while she got out of that abusive relationship.He became a bit extreme with his politics. I don't mind talking economic strategy, but when you start coming off as hateful towards people, I start not wanting to be around you.A dude I was friends with in high school decided it was a good idea to bring three truckloads of his dips**t friends I'd never met to my family's land and trash the place. I was out of town at trade school and this place has been in our family for four generations. I told him the rules and he broke them. There were 25 square yards of broken liquor bottles and other s**t I had to clean up. When I confronted him about it he outright lied to me saying he didn't know anything about it. I called his a*s out. I told him if saw him up there again it'd be the last place he set foot.He constantly tried to one-up me in conversation. I couldn't have a "win" in life without him trying to talk about how he "won" more. I didn't need it in my life anymore.We were great friends in junior high and part of high school. Into early adulthood, he ONLY called me when he needed something. Quit taking his calls.I am kind of outgrowing them. I like staying in and relaxing with my weekend, and he still gets drunk at the bar at least once a week. We have fun sometimes but I would prefer to just be at my house.I’ve lost a few over the years:
- kept breaking up and getting back together with a girl he thought was super boring and he really didn’t like but she was always there. Got tired of him moaning about her but then stringing her a long. Thought it was cruel and realized that’s not the type of man I want to hang out with.
- developed a sour attitude in life about how he couldn’t get ahead. He slowly got jealous of the groups of guys we hang out with success and got mean spirited. We ALL tried to help him, get him jobs, interviews, hired him etc to get him experience but the f****r wouldn’t work hard at all.
- did way too many drugs and partied but didn’t clean up for work and important things. Was a liability to keep hanging out with himMy best friend from childhood became a white supremacist. I’m not white. Even his family had no idea what happened to him.He helped my soon-to-be ex-wife steal everything i own.Was friends with a dude for like 15 years, played in a band with him, drank every other weekend. Then I saw him on Creep Catchers. Haven't talked since.He was my best man and I wasn't even in his wedding party.Finding out he had been, in the least, snooping in my best friend's house while house sitting and reading my best friend's wife's journal.Unfortunately for me it was a group of guy friends. As I grew older I realised what the group would call "banter" was actually just really toxic arsehole-ish behaviour. They would constantly try to one up each other until someone would get upset. I don't have time for that kind of negativity anymore.He asked me if I could send him $700.00, at 8pm on a Saturday, but he needed the money the next day and all this is after he moved out of state months prior.
He gave me a sob story about having a rough time since he moved. Problem is this wasn't the first story he's given me, I had also sent him $50.00 a few weeks earlier, but despite his promises to pay me back a few days later I was ghosted. But that $700 was the last straw, I was done.
He moved back to town a year or so ago, he tried a few times to contact me. I've never replied, I hope he's doing better, but f**k him.Breach of trust. Theft, adultery, betrayal.He slept with two of my girlfriends. I had texts and a video to prove it. And I confronted him about it on both occasions, and he said 'it wasn’t me' like he was Shaggy. Look, if he would have been a man and admitted it to me, I would have been OK with it and moved on because he was one of my best friends. But, because he continued to lie to me, I cut him off. Now after 10 years, he randomly decided to come clean. Like, f**k you, you had your chance.I was his only friend. Other friends had ghosted him and now I know why. No boundaries and depended on me for all of his social outlet. It was too much.
Not only did I want to end the friendship, I did end it.He revels in being a source of chaos, wallows in crude and socially-unacceptable behavior, and thinks that other people react badly to it all because they're jealous that he "does what he wants." There was a string of incidents, and finally it was just too exhausting to stay connected to him. Sad part of it was that when we first met, he was funny and puckish but not a jacka*s. His divorce messed him up and added an edge of destructiveness to it all.My best friend if 16 years let me know 2 hours before his shift that he was quitting the job I hired him for, that's not the reason but it gets better, his GF was also working for me. He broke up with her, quit on me and then started posting all over social media saying that I was banging her at work, he started saying how he could never work for an organization that took everything that was important to him, threatening me, threatening her and even showing up to the work place to try start s**t. A few months later he tried reaching out but he still had it in his head that I was hooking up with her at work, which is complete BS. I worked hard to get where I am and wouldn't risk it for an office-fling with one of my subordinates. My best friend of 16 years should have had the presence of mind to be a man and talk to me about it before assuming all this c**p. I'm friends with his ex and apparently he still brings up my name as the reason why they broke up even though it's almost been a year. It makes me wonder why I was friends with such a loser for over half my lifeHe thought he was too popular for me;
I introduced him to all my friends and I invited him to all the parties I threw. People finally started to acknowledge him and all this ‘new found fame’ got to his head. He started acting all cocky to me and to everyone else and he changed up his attitude, different from when I first met him. He didn’t know many people when I first met him but I dropped him because of his attitude, he’s clearly off without me. I was also at lunch with my other friend once and he was there. He was making plans with the other friend for a lunch on Friday. He looked at me dead in the eye and told me not to come. That really was my final straw. The only reason he thinks he’s popular too is because people laugh at him and at the foolish things he does but he thinks they are laughing with him.He was my childhood best friend. I went to the military, and he became a m**h addict. When I got out of the military, I realized he was involved in stuff I wanted no part in. I let his family know about his drug problems since I was close with them. The only time I spoke with him after that was the day he got out of prison.They stole a pushbike and told our neighbours it was me that stole the bike and they kept saying things like the Australian Aboriginals were neanderthals that needed to be skull-dragged into the 20th century. So with me... I came to find out he didn't really support anything positive I was doing or accomplishing. I realized this was a bitter person who didn't actually want me to be happy because he wasn't.When he made a pass at my now wife years ago.
I ended the friendship immediatelyWhen I realized my best friend was a narcissist and only kept people in his life because of what utility he could get out of them. We didn't have a friendship, we had a strong alliance. I became convinced that he would gladly burn that alliance if his internal calculus showed it to be more profitable to do so. After these realizations I couldn't keep him in my life and still respect myself.He slept with to many of my ex's, one being while I still had feelings for her, while he continously cheated on gf/wife (now). If he can't respect the girl he claims to love he sure as hell hasn't and won't respect me.>1. His anger issues and that he SA'd our mutual friend. >2. I tried getting my ex-best friend to ask out a girl, I ended up dating her, then she cheated on me with him.We kept making plans to hang out and when the time came he was always too hung over... So I stopped reaching out... Sucked thoughWhen I realized that his entire brand of humour is racist and other offensive jokes, and that to him they aren't "just jokes" if you catch my drift.He took me for granted, so I left.He got hyper political and just became a drag to be around because he tried to steer every conversation back to it.Letting his depression and insecurities run wild. Making everything a competition that would weigh on his self esteem most of the time. Just a lot of stuff like that.Lies and the way they treated ladiesHe ended it first. Didn't like my GF. Came back a year later, saying he wanted to be friends again, not because he missed hanging out with me, but because it felt weird to not be friends. Everything after that just felt strained and forced.
I left town a few years later, and came back for a quick visit. I made it clear this was the last time I'd be in town. Hangouts were forced and relatively quiet, and at the end of it all instead of saying goodbye, he was more concerned about a stray cat that he thought snuck into his garage.
This was my best friend of 10 years, who I'd been there through thick and thin with since we were kids.He was missing and lacking self awarenessFlakiness.I used to play csgo and dota 2 and talk on discord with 3 other guys who were close friends, they invited one of their friends who bullied me in the past, at first i thought it was fine (its been 7 years since we all saw each other and i try to believe people change over time)
So now there was 4 of them + me and we had a 5 man party for both dota and csgo
Slowly he (the bully guy from the past started treating me like s**t) i said something to the 3 of them and they didnt speak to him about it once over a 3 month period.
This happened when i was 23 i basically gave them an ultimatum, either get him to stop treating me like absolute garbage, or were done, they didnt respond to my ultimatum and i told them all as well as the bully in a facebook chat we had and discord that they all can go f**k themselves as well as a bunch of other swear words.
It was the best decision i ever made, no one should have to go through mental gymnastics all because they invited 1 person who is total scum just to play games with your friends.
The sad thing is i really, really enjoyed playing with them. Ill admit i cried alittle when i realised this was the end of my friendship. 2 of the 3 i knew since primary school in year 1 all because they wouldnt say something to 1 guy who always treated me like total garbage.I walked in on him and my ex…… a******s made tacos without me. You don’t come back from that.Dude gossiped more than my female friends and had a big target on his back. Yeah, nah. I'm good. Have a nice life.Mental health: I had an entire group of friends that I often would game with, tabletop mind you. I left for work in a different state, I learn that the entire group had gone dark and hasn't been gaming or even hanging out with anyone, just being little hermits. I come back home a few years later to reconnect and I learn that their mental health had hit an all time low and I couldn't even get them to communicate to me via any sort of means. They were a good group of people but I'm not going to poison my own self and drag them out of this weird spot they are in. Months later I still haven't heard from them.
