I was given a real insight into how life has changed for Olympic mothers when I did a joint interview with Denise Lewis a few months ago. Denise was an extraordinary competitor who won gold in the heptathlon at the 2000 Olympic Games in Sydney, at a time when little was expected of British athletes. But, 24 years later, she explained how horrendously she had been treated as a mum.
Denise described it as “a very lonely experience” because, after giving birth in 2002 to her daughter, Lauryn, she was told that her coaches and other support staff would talk to her only once she was back on “the performance pathway”. She was isolated and felt like “a performing animal with no heart and soul”.
I was really sad for Denise even though she stressed how much attitudes towards motherhood in elite sport have been transformed. But it’s shocking to think that such treatment happened in the 21st century.
Memories of our interview came flooding back last Sunday when I watched Amber Rutter win silver in the women’s skeet, three months after she became a mother. Amber was one of my teammates at the Rio Olympics in 2016, when she was 18. It’s incredible to think she gave birth to her son this April. In Paris, she lost a controversial shoot-off against Francisca Crovetto Chadid of Chile after they had ended with identical scores.
Amber was convinced, and the TV replays showed she was right, that she hit the last target but the judges decided otherwise. I don’t know how she managed to keep her composure but Amber showed so much class as she accepted the result. She was then met by her husband, James, who had surprised her and brought Tommy, their little ’un, with him. Amber has those photographs of them together to always remind her of an amazing achievement.
Flipping heck. Three months after giving birth I was barely walking so whenever I hear Amber Rutter’s name from now on I will think: “What a mother, what a woman.”
Nine mothers are in the Team GB squad and, besides Amber, we have seen gold medals for Katy Marchant and Ros Canter, a silver for Helen Glover and a bronze for Mathilda Hodgkins-Byrne.
The fact that it’s becoming normal for mothers to succeed at this level of sport presents a sharp contrast to even a decade ago. I remember my own reaction when hearing early in 2014 that Jess Ennis-Hill was pregnant but still hoped to defend her Olympic heptathlon title in 2016. My husband, Jason, and I looked at each other and said: “She’s mad. There is no way you can juggle motherhood with trying to win Olympic gold.” We thought she’d ended her career.
Thirteen months after Jess gave birth to her son, Reggie, she won the heptathlon at the world championships in Beijing. I was even more impressed by her silver medal at the 2016 Olympic Games in Rio. Until then, I’d always thought it was one or the other – you were either a current Olympian or a mother. Jess made me understand it was possible to be both.
Esme Matthews (then Taylor) was my physiologist at British Cycling and she is best mates with Jess. She put us in touch in 2017 and my first phone call with Jess lasted an hour and a half. I then went round to Jess’s for breakfast and she answered all my doubts and worries.
I would be asking really basic stuff like “how can I juggle it all?” Jess was so clear about the need to timetable everything. After giving birth, I used all her exercises during that key recovery time. In my sporting retirement Jess is still my go-to person when I need advice about being a mum of two living a very different life away from the intensity of Olympic competition.
Jess was also part of that interview I did with Denise and I was honoured to be in their company. Compared to everything Denise endured I had it easy. British Cycling and UK Sport now have pregnancy policies that are relaxed and supportive. There is no longer any pressure to come back immediately after the birth of your child. You can take eight months away before you need to even think about getting back on the bike and that’s not to get into racing shape. It’s just to gauge whether you have the desire to ride competitively again. I found it so positive and relaxed and I competed at the 2021 Tokyo Olympics after giving birth to my eldest boy, Albie, in 2017.
Parenting is still challenging and difficult, though. I have heard some horror stories, from two fathers involved in other sports, about children not being welcome at their training camps. I also found it draining mentally and emotionally trying to be a mum and a successful Olympian. Those aspects were far harder than the gruelling physicality.
I had lots of mum-guilt when I went to Tokyo and our families weren’t allowed to join us because of the pandemic. It was upsetting to leave Albie for two‑and‑a‑half weeks while Jason and I won gold again.
We knew Albie was fine, as he was with his grandparents, but that side of being an Olympic parent feels brutal. It meant I was no longer willing to keep riding to the Paris Games once our second son was born last year. I had suffered a miscarriage and an ectopic pregnancy before our yearning to have a second child was fulfilled by little Monty.
Seeing the joyful images of the Rutter family put everything into context. Amber just missed Olympic gold but it mattered far more to her that her baby boy was with her in those gorgeous photographs.
It was a reminder how much we sporting mums in Britain owe to modern pioneers such as the mighty Denise Lewis and Jess Ennis-Hill.
