Deathly silence on the terraces is not usually a sign that things are going exactly to plan on the pitch but last weekend, the tumbleweed-inducing silence that swept many football grounds across England could not have been more welcome, to my ears anyway.
The reason for this silence was for the English FA’s ‘Silent Support’ initiative, which encourages parents and other spectators on the sidelines of kids’ football games to, basically, keep their mouths shut.
I could not be more supportive of this imaginative initiative.
The “input” from some individuals on the sidelines at youth football, as well as a variety of other sports, is becoming, in many cases, a serious problem.
It’s now not uncommon to hear reports of referees of kids football, many of whom are young people themselves, be verbally or even physically assaulted by an irate parent who thinks a decision hasn’t gone the way of their child's team. Nor is it uncommon for parents to castigate or chastise their own kid for making a mistake, not trying hard enough or not making what they deem to be the right decision in that moment.
What has to be made clear in the first instance is that the result of any children's football match matters not a jot.
Whether they’re 6 years old or 10 years old or even a teenager, winning and losing doesn’t matter. Or at least it shouldn’t.
Yet we all know there’s some adults who either fundamentally disagree with this reality, or are unable to moderate their behaviour in accordance with it.
Across Britain, there’s individuals on the sidelines every weekend who spend the entirety of kids’ football games talking, shouting or just generally making noise in the direction of the players.
It can’t be repeated enough: constant input doesn’t help. At all.
Of course, everyone realises that abuse from the sidelines is detrimental and is a hugely damaging aspect that’s, anecdotally at least, becoming an increasing problem within children's football.
But then there’s the parents and other supporters who, since they’re not explicitly abusing anyone, think it’s okay for an endless stream of “input” to come out their mouths.
For the sake of the kids, stop it. Stop making any noise, other than some basic applause.
I’ve had experience of this on both sides of the fence; as a professional athlete myself and now as a parent on the sidelines to a 6-year-old who plays football. And I can say with complete certainty that shouting from the sidelines when a kid is playing sport is almost exclusively detrimental.
This is exactly why the English FA has made such a push to introduce the Silent Support weekend annually. Its purpose is, in the first instance, to draw attention and, ideally, stop abuse from the sidelines. But it’s also to help parents recognise that even what sounds like positive input is potentially damaging to the child.
Constant shouting of instructions doesn’t help young players, it only distracts them and prevents them from thinking for themselves.
If there’s constant noise coming from the sidelines, it’s impossible for any child to filter that out and solve any problems for themselves. Constant information and instructions being forced upon them do nothing except make it impossible for them to use their own problem-solving abilities. And its these abilities that’ll serve them well as they develop through the sporting ranks.
Even constant encouragement in the form of shouting isn’t helpful; the same theory applies that constant noise just makes it impossible for kids to have the space to think.
There are, of course, those who say the ‘Silent Support’ initiative is “woke rubbish”. In some ways, I can see their point. But what the English FA is encouraging is not complete silence but rather as little distraction as possible for the kids on the pitch. How, in any sensible world, can this be argued with?
Parents who are the culprits of this constant “input” more often than not think they’re being helpful. They think that if they just give their child that little bit of a push, they just might become the “next big thing”.
Much of this belief is because of examples such as Tiger Woods, the Williams sisters or David Beckham.
In Woods’ case, he had a golf club in his hand as soon as he could walk. In the Williams sisters case, their father had determined they would be elite tennis players before they’d even been born. And in the case of Beckham, his dad would send him out into their garden to practice free kicks for hours on end.
Except, this couldn’t be further from the truth.
Yes, Woods, the Williams’ and Beckham’s development was aided by pushy parents. But in all likelihood, they’d have made it anyway because they’re just truly exceptional individuals.
Most kids do not have what Woods, the Williams sisters and Beckham have. I know just how hard it is to make it in elite sport. If a kid doesn’t have every tool needed, they just won’t succeed, however hard they’re pushed.
For every Beckham in Britain, there’s literally a million or more kids who never made it.
And, spoiler alert, the chances that any parent reading this have a future David Beckham on their hands is virtually nil.
In reality, by shouting and screaming on the sidelines of a kids football game, what’s far more likely to happen is that every bit of joy will be sucked out of the sport for the child. They might very well end up chucking it entirely.
So while an entirely silent atmosphere isn’t ideal, it’s far preferable to the constant unhelpful noise that accompanies kids football matches every weekend across Britain.
For now, it’s only England that’s introduced the Silent Support weekend, but if it comes to Scotland too, it won’t be a minute too soon.
