A child psychologist has shared a small change you can make to your school drop-off routine to try and avoid a meltdown - but it's not always easy to implement.
Tears and tantrums at the school gates are not uncommon, and it can be exhausting for parents who have to peel away their little one morning after morning. Even if you've tried several settling-in ideas, helping a highly sensitive child go back to school can be tough to navigate and that moment when you part ways is one of many parents' back-to-school worries.
But there's one common drop-off habit that could be adding to children's upset. According to child psychologist Amanda Abel, one of the top things parents should avoid doing when taking their kid to school is sneaking off without saying goodbye.
Writing for Kidspot, Amanda said, "This is arguably the most anxiety-building mistake a parent can make during this time." She goes on to explain that this is because a lot of children start childcare around the time when separation anxiety is peaking - which is why the school drop-off can be such an emotional time for them.
Amanda warns, "As much as it may seem like a less painful option, NEVER sneak away when saying your goodbyes. Sneaking away will just create further anxiety for your child and confuse the concept."
If you've been fleeing from school when your kid's back is turned, you're most certainly not alone and we totally get why you want to save yourself the anguish of peeling away from a crying child. Plus, if they're starting to look distracted, you might not want to draw their attention back to you.
Fortunately, Amanda also shared some tips on how to manage a 'good-goodbye', so you can build a more positive drop-off routine.
How to manage a 'good goodbye'
- Pass your child to the educator.
- Say your goodbyes and tell them you’ll be back later to pick them up.
- A lot of children will have a meltdown and be upset at this time, but most are totally fine within five minutes - there are lots of distractions to keep them busy.
- Never lie to them and make sure to offer them realistic expectations; e.g. if another family member or carer will collect them at the end of the day, give your child full warning so they can mentally prepare for this.
Amanda adds that every child is different, and some will find the milestone of starting school or nursery more difficult than others. But she encourages parents to remember, "Attending kindergarten and/or daycare is a positive step for your child, it’s providing them with socialisation and educational opportunities that help prepare them for their future."
She adds, "Be consistent with your goodbyes and everyone will settle into their new norms in no time."
In other news, teachers have revealed the best ways to get your kids back-to-school ready and we've rounded up 19 great first day of school traditions to do with your kids. One mum shared the ten things she wishes she'd known before her child started school, and our Family Editor shared why moving schools was the best decision for her five-year-old.
