Paralympian Ellie Simmonds has revealed for the first time that she was adopted when she was three months old but has now been reunited with her birth mother.
The gold medal-winning swimmer last year embarked on a search for her blood family after finding out she had been put up for adoption at 10 days old.
She was devastated to discover her mum wished she had died at birth after medics told her Ellie would be ridiculed and seen as “evil” and “stupid”.
But it didn’t stop Ellie, 28, who was born with achondroplasia, the most common form of dwarfism, from wanting to find her.
And after an emotional five-hour first meeting, she reveals the pair are still in touch and rebuilding their relationship.
“Until now, it’s never emotionally affected me, it never made me feel rejected or ask why do my birth parents not want me,” she says in a new ITV documentary. “I’ve been so focussed on the future and never thought about it.”
Ellie, who won five gold medals during her career in Beijing, London and Rio, has often talked about her parents as her biggest supporters but never before revealed how the couple, who have four other children, adopted her as a baby.
But when “questions started to bubble up” she decided to go in search of answers, beginning with photos and documents that her parents, of Aldridge West Mids, had kept for her.
“One of the reasons for being given up for adoption is dwarfism and maybe it can be a factor of why my personality is like it is, because of that rejection at the start,” she explains.
With the help of a specialist social worker, Ellie first got hold of the files relating to her birth.
Days after she was born the hospital confirmed Ellie had achondroplasia.
An information sheet given to her birth mother warned how her daughter would have a “large skull and depressed nasal bridge” and that children with her condition “tend to be muscular and acrobatic, which is perhaps the reason for them traditionally being involved in the circus and other forms of theatre”.
The form continued: “Children have to deal with being stared at and laughed at by other children. Indeed, there are those with normal height who equate short stature with evil and stupidity.”
Ellie, whose birth mother named her Eleanor, says: “Can you imagine reading that and thinking, ‘That’s my child’? In a way, I understand, when you don’t know anything about the disability and you get this. You’re going to be scared.”
In another blow, a social worker report described how her mother “feels very guilty regarding Eleanor’s disability and wishes she had an abortion, or that Eleanor had died”.
Shocked, Ellie nearly called off the search, but getting in touch with the family of her foster carer who looked after her from two weeks to three months old convinced her to carry on. Ellie wept as her foster mum’s daughter revealed she died last year. Her foster carer hadn’t wanted to reach out in case Ellie didn’t know she was adopted.
The daughter tells her: “I remember you coming to my mum’s. You were crying all the time, the first few weeks you were such a sad little girl and my mum just kept loving you and nursing you until you were fine.
“When you went to the Olympics she said to us, ‘I’m positive that’s Ellie who I fostered’. Because she remembered your adoptive parents had a swimming pool.
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“She watched you on telly and she’d have been so chuffed to know you knew you were fostered, it’s so sad she’s not here for you to tell her.”
Ellie, who last year competed in BBC1’s Strictly Come Dancing with professional partner Nikita Kuzmin, says: “What got me was the fact she knew. She was watching me on TV and knew it was me. I left it too late.” Her social worker eventually found contact details for her birth mother, who lived nearby. “I could have seen her walking down the street. I might have walked past her,” Ellie says.
The pair exchanged letters, and Ellie again breaks down in tears as she reads her mother’s letter: “Your father and I separated before I realised I was expecting you. Unfortunately it was very sad and traumatic in my life and I struggled with my mental health.
“I’ve suffered with guilt and self-hatred for not being strong enough to cope. I cannot express the happiness I feel to know your parents and siblings have provided you with such a loving environment, that you’re so happy. You’ve achieved so much.”
Finally, mother and daughter met in a hotel, when they spent five hours together and felt a special connection.
Ellie, who has decided to protect her identity, says: “It was amazing. I didn’t realise the time was passing by.
“We were howling with laughter, we’ve got the same sense of humour. I kept looking at her and thinking, ‘Wow that’s my mum’. I felt like her face was just like mine. What touched my heart was she said she thinks about me every day, and she still sees me as her daughter.
“It’s helped with finding out who I am, looking at someone who birthed me, the nature I’m from, it makes you a bit more whole.
“Questions I’ve carried for years have been answered. I’m proud of my life and I love my family, and maybe that family just got a bit bigger.”
- Ellie Simmonds: Finding My Secret Family, ITV1, Thursday, July 6, 9pm.
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