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Salon
Salon
Lifestyle
Gabriella Ferrigine

Stephen Colbert: "Don't shoot anyone"

Stephen Colbert on Tuesday's episode of "The Late Show" addressed gun owners directly, following the most recent apparent assassination attempt on former president Donald Trump.

“I just want to state the obvious right off the bat: Political violence has no place in America,” the host said, noting how he'd been at the Emmy Awards in Los Angeles on the day of the alleged attempt, which took place at Trump's West Palm Beach golf course. 

"In fact, can I talk to all the gun owners for just a second? Don’t shoot anyone. If you have even the vaguest idea that you might shoot someone, sell your gun and use that money to buy yourself a little treat," Colbert said, suggesting the money could be used to purchase “pancakes” or “one of those bicycle license plates with your name on it.”

“Or, you know what, a flute,” Colbert added. “Learn the flute. Call your kids and tell them you’re trading your guns for a flute. They might visit.”

Colbert continued by describing the suspect, Ryan Wesley Routh, who reportedly had staked out a hole on the ex-president's course and was equipped with an AK-47-style rifle with a scope. Routh, who Colbert described as a "truly deranged man" for spending 12 hours camped out on the course, was charged with federal firearms offenses on Monday, with The Associated Press noting that additional charges, including attempted murder, could be brought. 

“That sounds like an evil plot straight out of 'Looney Tunes,'” Colbert quipped, before observing Routh's meandering political affiliations. Social media posts revealed prior support for MAGA, former Democratic representative turned GOPer Tulsi Gabbard, Nikki Haley, and Vivek Ramaswamy. “That’s like saying: ‘I’ll have the soup and if you don’t have that I will take sneakers,’” the host jested. "And if you don't have that, I'll take Vivek Ramaswamy."

Colbert also called out Trump for trying to foist blame for the attack on his Democratic opponents — President Joe Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris — citing a recent Fox News appearance in which Trump said, “Their rhetoric is causing me to be shot at, when ... they are the ones that are destroying the country — both from the inside and out.”

“Nothing like blaming someone else for something you’re doing in the same sentence,” Colbert said. “‘Darling, you calling me unattractive hurts my feelings—marriage should be built on love, and I’m beginning to think you’re too fugly to understand that.’”

For Harris' part, she shared on X that she was "glad" Trump was safe. "Violence has no place in America,” she wrote.

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