Seth Meyers
On Tuesday’s Late Night, Seth Meyers touched on the Food and Drug Administration’s approval of Pfizer’s Covid-19 vaccine. Will it convince as-yet unvaccinated people that the shot is safe and effective? “I don’t know, something tells me they’re going to find a way to move the goal posts again,” said Meyers, mocking a vaccine skeptic: “Sure, it’s FDA-approved, but is it farm-to-table? Something that’s suddenly very important to me?”
The FDA-approved vaccine will be marketed under the name “Comirnaty,” a combination of the terms Covid-19, mRNA, community and immunity. “So now, people will start referring to the Pfizer vaccine as the Pfizer vaccine – it’s too late for a rebrand,” Meyers said.
“It’s like when your friend comes back from vacation and is like, ‘uh, actually everyone calls me Turbo now.’ No, they don’t. You’re Andrew, and you’re still kinda lame.”
In other news, the president of the Arizona senate announced the state’s rightwing “investigation” into the 2020 election would be delayed after several members of third-party contractor CyberNinjas became infected with Covid. “Man, at this rate, we’ll never get to find out what didn’t actually happen,” Meyers joked.
And Andrew Cuomo delivered his final speech as governor of New York on Monday, as he resigned after the state attorney general found he groped and sexually harassed members of his staff. Cuomo acknowledged the scandal in his speech, and claimed he was a victim of an unfair “political and media stampede”. “Yeah, what kind of white man whose dad was also governor only gets ten years in office?” Meyers responded.
Jimmy Fallon
On the Tonight Show, Jimmy Fallon discussed Sony’s release of a teaser trailer for Spider Man: No Way Home a day after it was leaked online. “Fans are going nuts – people haven’t been this excited about a kid who lives with his aunt since the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air,” he joked.
“In the trailer, Spider-Man visits Dr Strange and asks him to turn back time. Then President Biden shows up and asks for the same thing,” he quipped.
Fallon pivoted to the US intelligence report on the origins of Covid, which was delivered to the White House this week. The classified report, a redacted version of which will released to the public within days, was unable to definitively conclude whether the virus first emerged in China via animals or escaped a highly secure research facility in Wuhan, according to the Washington Post.
“And like everything with this pandemic, I’m sure Americans will fully accept the truth and it will put all conspiracy theories to rest,” Fallon said of the report.
The report will be released in a few days “or sooner, if Sony accidentally leaks it early,” he joked.
As for the Comirnaty rebrand – “Listen, if they really want people to take it, they should’ve just called it White Claw,” Fallon quipped.
